I panicked feeling unprepared for parenthood at 38 weeks and took a tree identification course to help me be the kind of parent I wanted to be. What a plonker!

[nevergoogledragonbutter]

DH and I were remembering the other day that we were so worried that we weren't ready to become parents and we didn't know enough to pass on to our unborn child.

I promptly booked us onto a tree identification walk in a local ancient woodland and spent the day filling our heads with information we could teach our child.

I was so pregnant I didn't fit through the kissing gate and they had to open up the big farm gate for my waddling self.

He'll be 5 this week and has still never asked us about particular types of trees.

His favourite tree is 'a green one'.

The other day he spent hours quizzing us on killer whales and DH said, 'Can't you ask us about trees?'

I'm really really hoping somebody else is going to come along and tell me what stupid things they felt necessary to being a prepared parent so I don't feel quite so silly.

Haha, nice one, Dragon! A tree-identifcation course - best one I've heard!

I don't think I'll take a leaf out of your book, though. People would think I was barking mad.

(Might be some tree puns left for someone else, branch, roots, nuts, etc.)

ROFL at Morningpaper and the Golf.
All I can remember is that I intended to go volunteer in nurseries for a few weeks before the birth, because I knew had no practical experience whatsoever in caring for babies. This was 10 years ago, and maybe I would have been accepted as a volunteer back then (in reality, I decided to sit on the sofa, eat lots of chocolate and generally enjoy brooding).

Can you imagine getting a volunteer job at a nursery today, the leaps and hoops of getting CRB checked and suitable-person vetted?

Yay! We made it into the roundup.

Still waiting for the day i make it into the round up for saying something ridiculous rather than just being ridiculous. but hey ho.