What did his ex mean by this?

[merrysunflower]

Last week I attended a sporting event for my partners son.
during the match my partner and her partner were cheering on the team. I think it turned into a little bit of who could shout the loudest. She pulled her partner back and was speaking to him and I heard her say ‘we don’t have to love them the loudest’ the partner instantly reined it in.

it’s really played on my mind all week. What do you think was behind that comment?

It does in the sense that the OP seems mostly concerned that the child’s mother was having a dig rather than recognising that the adults were behaving like children themselves.

The men were having a d!ck swinging contest and it was not about cheering the kid on. Mum noticed and told them to pack it in.

Well done mum.

Thanks for the perspective.
The comment just doesn’t align with what I’ve been led to believe about her. I’m having some issues in my own relationship and that comment just really stuck in my head and made me question things. Things I’ve thought about her and things in my own relationship.
my partner tried to tell me it was intentional to have this exact affect on me.
but the more of these events, the more I see of her, the more I struggle to see the version I’ve been sold.
definitely not bitter or out to cause trouble with her at all.

Ah right, so your partner has sold her to you as the evil ex, and now you’re starting to see that perhaps he’s twisting the narrative?

Let's just say that out of her, the dad and the step dad, she came out as the better person. Probably best you get to know her rather than the version you've been sold.

No, that's not what I mean. It's a shame that your view of step-parenting is an automatic assumtion about it becoming a pissing contest. When adults can actually behave as adults, there should be zero issues with step parents being as supportive as bio parents. I'm a teacher and once had Mum and Step-Mum turn up to parents evening together - those kids were so loved and supported, just as it should be.