Most amazing job advert ever

[samarrange]

Make sure you are not drinking anything when you read this, because you will blow liquid out of your nose. https://www.tes.com/jobs/vacancy/private-tutor-london-england-oxfordshire-2256768

Oh, here's the funny thing, there's no single 'American Curriculum'...it's all different based on states, school boards, neighborhoods...we don't have any national standardized high school curriculum. And there's no single teacher who could possibly teach everything needed for a high school diploma. They'd have to know math, English, history, chemistry, biology, physics, US government, shop, etc.

Ooof!

Darn why did my parents have to be middle class instead of upper class

I can play 3 blind mice on the recorder and speak right good English for £180,000

Professor Higgings?

I have a 'golden child' son who could do this job. National sportsman, top school, Westminster contacts. Does 'the season'.

Would he do it? Probably not as fancies himself as the big cheese one day!

*applications will not be considered from candidates who have not taught the American curriculum.” (My emphasis)

They do say they want a tutor “with a breadth of subject knowledge”.
Breadth? I think you can have a narrow breadth as well as a wide one. You can certainly have a narrow width.

If you’re a teacher, or anyone perhaps, you’ll probably enjoy reading the descriptions of the student and the tutor here.

Will probably whisper Shakespeare while the child sleeps

4 weeks holiday a year? No thank you.

This has me intrigued? KM was a hacker but why would this link be compromised and how is clicking it harmful?

It’s how BBC newsreaders used to speak back in the day! English but well spoken with no accent! Meant to sound posh! If you listen to a news article from 40 years ago you will hear the difference to newsreaders now.

Sounds like something that batshit couple from the real housewives of New York would have written but about French culture.

Ooh yes. Does any of this fit in with Kate’s early years programme?

Yeah, the 5 year old is clearly already a huge disappointment!

The student’s hobbies have included golf, boxing, and cosmetology

She spends her time currently fannying around on tiktok watching make up videos.

“The family have encountered classroom teachers who seem to have social agendas that they inappropriately include into unrelated teaching of their subjects. As such the Tutor should be discreet regarding their opinions and certainly not bring overly personal matters into the educational arena.”

The student has got mixed up in gender crap and the family are taking her out of school.
It’ll be a busy day starting with 9 holes of golf, following online learning and then doing all the tutor stuff. That’ll keep them off TikTok though.

I assumed the gender there. Possibly wrongly.

Gosh, that poor child. And the older sibling, doomed because the education started too late at 5.

It was the reference to local polo matches that young sir might enjoy that really had me giggling.

(edited as I also assumed sir… then questioned self.. then reread )

Entirely your prerogative - although the TES is generally considered to be reputable; but I don't know what you'll get from this thread if you don't know what everybody is talking about!

I wonder if they serve mashed up banana and spaghetti hoops in the elite polo club restaurant?!

It's not just 5 hours a day though. It says they expect more hours in order to "prep" raising "the boy". Poor child will definitely have attachment issues, basically raised by a Nanny, Tutor and driver plus probably numerous other staff. . The Nanny must have it made, just faffing about ironing a few baby clothes for 5 hours a day.

That kid would end up looking down on his parents' culture. Already happens when Asian parents send their kids to private schools.

$284,000 with 9 weeks off!

$284,000 with 9 weeks off

At first I thought that was a lot of holiday, and then I realised that teachers normally get more than that. When I worked in a boarding school we had the whole of July and August off - 8 weeks - plus Christmas (3), Easter (3) and three half terms (just over 3).

I didn't get £200 000 pa, though.

You cannot buy what you are not.
I went to Oxford but got dumped by my titled boyfriend at wife hunting time. The reason? Not enough land.
He's an unhappy thrice mariied drunk, I'm still married to the first Mr Luce.

I've got an RP accent, I'll do it. I mean, I don't plan highly creative activities for my own one year old, but he doesn't pay me £180k a year, so...

No. Because obviously I’m thick. At least I think that’s what you’re implying in your lovely passive aggressive manner.