Why the Friggity Frig <GLARES> didn't anyone, not one of you, think

[Honeydragon]

to tell me what a piece of piss Chicken and Sweetcorn soup is to make! It takes 5 minutes and costs fuck all. I have being buying this stuff you know? With ACTUAL money.

One idle google and 10 minutes later dd and I have a pan full for lunch, it's lovely.

It was bad enough finding out about cleaning washing machines, and Veet to unclog hairy plug holes.... and now you failed to tell me this

Well you horrible lot, what else have you being holding out on, and keeping from me?????

I want to know why mumsnet never told me that when you go to the hair dresser to have your hair dyed a permanent colour you should leave your hair unwashed?

I went today and thought I'd do them a favour by washing and brushing my hair before I got there as it's really long and curly and takes ages.

They all laughed at me and said "ah how sweet". I honestly thought one was going to pat me on the head and tell me I was a good girl.

Only then did they decide to tell me that they couldn't do my hair. I felt so bloody stupid and have decided to blame you lot for not telling me! Yes. I know IABU but I don't care!

:o at plastic fruit.....blardy genius idea :o

I've never made the talk round up

Oh my God, I just read this and who knew what a bloody pain in the arse having a Tortoise was?

I am never going to get one, not now.

You people whingeing about e-cloths - the problem isn't the cloth, its your hands. (talk about bad workmen blaming their tools ). I know what it must be - you've missed yet another Thing Which Everyone Should Know. Namely, Flexitol. You anoint your feet with it every night (and knees, backs of arms, anywhere else inclined to be rough... not quite everywhere ). And lo and behold, into the bargain you get lovely soft hands which don't stick to e-cloths.

grin @ Chaos' warning!

Fail

:o at the warning for Chaos :o

It can't be my hands, they are lovely and soft as I never do any housework

(runs off to buy plastic fruit, although knowing my luck ds2 who will never eat the fruit in his lunch will try to eat the plastic fruit)

Grimma, if this stuff goes on your feet does that mean I have to do cleaning with my e cloth with my feet??
I struggle to clean with my hands....

No, you fool, you put the cream on your feet using your hands, thereby softening your hands at the same time.

I'm such an idiot!!

There's so much "stuff I need to know"
Where does everyone learn it all from

My dd is 14, I'm starting to teach her this stuff now-apart from the bizarre sex stuff which she probably knows more about than me

Oh my crossing out didn't work :(

Years of experience, m'dear. Over half a century in my case. MN is excellent for learning from other peoples mistakes experience of course.

Im 34 though, I feel about 12 reading all this stuff I don t know :(

FFS I can't ever have a crumpet again. Years ago when I was 12 I saw a photo in a newspaper of a baby with 2 cigarettes coming out of its head. Many things remind me of it, and it is really awful, and now the bloody crumpet will remind me of it.

You were warned!!

That was just from reading "Holes," I didn't even click on any link or google!!

Definitely don't then. :)

I love crumpets :)
Debating whether to look......no i will be strong!
--I'm a liar, I read the first couple of "itchy vagine" posts and had to stop cos my dd is cooking dinner and I want to be able to eat it.

I love crumpets therefore I will NOT look as will never forgive you lot if you take away my crumpet eating joy

I've read the thread, but couldn't find the link . Admittedly I did have to go and make tea for the DC so lost my place.

Don't you think it's strange that we all KNOW it's going to be disgusting but still want to look?

DO NOT. You will regret it. It has nothing to do with actual crumpets but you will never want them again.

I wonder if what it actually is, is worse than what I'm now picturing in my head?

Don't oven cleaning men have to take your oven out and clean it in a dodgy looking van in the street?

Also, I find that blueberries always make my fridge smell bad! Yes blueberries... but only when they come in a container with a clear film cover, not when they come in a plastic container with a proper lid.