3rd or more time lucky - IVF cycle buddies October

[Hobbes39]

Hi Just wondering of there are folks on here who are about to go through their 3rd + time of IVF who want a cycle buddy? I dont mean it badly towards anyone who is starting their IVF journey for the first time, (i was there just this time last year after all) but I feel a bit like I cant be as optomistic about it as I was, so dont want to drag any first timers down? Hope that makes sense!
Anyway, just to explain about me:
TTC #2 for over 2.5 years now
Unexplained Secondary Infertility (have 4 year old DS)
Age 40.5
AMH: 15.4
2 failed fresh and 1 falied FET (with single frozen 3BB embryo we got from 2nd fresh round)
about to start 3rd fresh round when my period starts in approx 7-10 days, so will probably be late october EC.
anyone else a bit jaded, but still vaguely hopeful want to join me?
xx

wanda pleased you have at least 2 to freeze. Fingers crossed the others catch up too.
Hope everyone else ok

Yeah wanda! You have something for the freezer.
hobbes, user and fab hang in there.
Bjones remember to drink loads of water when taking burselin to avoid the headaches.
I have ET sheduled for tomorrow afternoon- slightly panicked today just at thought of 2ww 😬

Hope it goes well tomorrow decafplease. Have you got anything in your diary over the next 2 weeks to take your mind off the 2ww a bit? If I'd been starting mine today I think it would have been better than last time, as my work diary is quite varied for the next week or so. Never mind.

Have lost track of whose OTD is first. Think either Hobbes or user?

DW is disappointed to have only 2 blasts from 7 eggs. I think 2 is better than nothing, though the embryologist did say he expected at least 3. Some people seem to end up with several. It all seems so random sometimes.

Feeling quite low at the moment as have had pinkish and brown cm so think may be our girlies x

Try not to worry user. Is it too late for it to be implantation bleeding?

@1Wanda1 I really don't know but worried that it seems to have been doing it for 24 hours now on and off. Admittedly not a lot but enough for concern x

Hopefully it will not turn into anything more, user, and you can get through the next couple of days. I've just read back through the thread and see that your OTD is Friday, not too long now.

Hi @user1497036202 - can't remember if you are fresh or FET? I spotted around this time on my cycle last time and that was a BFP (albeit MC later) so it could be anything. I know you know your own body best, so you will probably know if it's def your period coming, but will keep everything crossed. X
@1Wanda1 - that's great you have at least 2 Frosties - to go from possibly cancelling the whole thing to having 2 good quality embryos is great - good luck for the others.
Good luck for tomorrow @Decafplease X
AFM - I stupidly did an IC test this am. (6dp5dt)It was blindingly white, not even a hint of a line. I know it's still early, and I know I am a mass of contradiction as I said I wouldn't, but this morning I just did it thinking I need to prepare myself. I just feel it hasn't worked - my cervix is low when I insert the pessaries, I just feel so negative... anyway, my OTD is same as user, I go into hospital for blood test. I haven't got any other HPTs so will just wait til then. Will prob pick up a HPT on way back from blood test if period hasn't started as I'd prefer to know before the call in the afternoon.
Feeling so deflated. If this hasn't worked that's 8 embryos transferred in total over 5 transfers and still no baby. At the beginning of this journey I was repeatedly told that the fact I had a naturally conceived DS meant that I should be able to get pregnant again no bother... then when that didn't happen I was told that I had a higher chance of success with IVF cos of it... but 0 from 8 is not beating the odds!
I'm so scared I'm just too old and should give up ☹️.
(You an probably tell the kicking up the backside I had myself didn't work!) x
Hi to everyone else & hope you are all doing ok x

user it could be nothing, prev cycle buddies have had bleeds but still BFPs. Hope so for you!
AFM, booked the rest of the week off. Work with a bunch of stuff you are supposed to avoid if pregnant. Every time i do a cycle i have to make up excuses so i can avoid the dangerous stuff. Each time my female co-workers give me knowing looks thinking i am pregnant already and it stresses me out! Would take the whole 2ww off if i could...

Good luck for tomorrow decaf
hobbes and user try and hang on in there - so hard as we all know only 3 sleeps until your test date.

That's hard @Decafplease - I just hate those knowing looks! Mine isn't the same but my work get so suspicious when I am not drinking - I just make up excuses cabs head home! X

hobbes we must have cross posted, i didnt see your message. Infertility is shit & the the 2ww is the worst. Hope you are not feeling so down today.
Thanks user, bjones and wanda for the good wishes. Trying to calm myself as much as possible before this afternoon. Told myself i wasnt going to do any woo stuff this cycle but last minute bought frozen pineapple, meditation app and this morning was trying to remember what i wore to last partially successful transfer...DH thinks i’ve finally gone round tge bend...🤷‍♀️

decafplease your post made me laugh! In similarly woo mindset I have already bought myself a load of supplements for next cycle, booked acupuncture, am getting the meditation app, and will probably also be eating pineapple core while necking pomegranate juice and Brazil nuts.

I hope today goes well for you. Sending lots of positive thoughts.

Hi guys just to keep you posted I started bleeding a lot this morning so is looking like a definite no - even the clinic has said it looks like bad news. Feeling down in the dumps and just terrified now that this means we will not have our own children. Will take some getting used to I think x

user I'm so sorry. It really is shit isn't it. un-musnetty hugs to you x

@user1497036202 so devastating 😢😢 I hope you can try again in the future, or go on to adopt, and they will be your children, once you have them home xx

User I'm so sorry to read your news, you must be feeling devastated right now. Please be kind to yourself. X

I remembered I found this list of what was happening day by day really helpful, especially in the early days. I'm 6dp5dt now. 14 feels like forever away.

5 DAY TRANSFER

Days past transfer Embryo Development
1 The blastocyst begins to hatch out of its shell
2 The blastocyst continues to hatch out of its shell and begins to attach itself to the uterus
3 The blastocyst attaches deeper into the uterine lining, beginning implantation
4 Implantation continues
5 Implantation is complete, cells that will eventually become the placenta and fetal cells begin to develop
6 Placenta cells secrete human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) starts to enter the blood stream
7 Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted
8 Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted
9 Levels of hCG are now high enough to detect a pregnancy on HPT

Hobbs have you read Is My Body Baby Friendly? By Dr Beer? I had undiagnosed infertility but following reading that book and a conversation with my (private) consultant who studied under Dr Beer for a while (I think - having a brain fart at the moment) I went on to have the Chicago Tests and discovered that I have a few auto immune ishoos which may well have affected my ability to conceive. Certainly the first 2 rounds I did with 3 embies each weren't successful and he 3 round with lots of auto immune support and 2 2 day old embies was a lot more successful! It's definitely worth a read IMHO.

PS. Ain't nothing wrong with a bit of woo! Emma Cannon's Baby Making Bible is excellent if you want some of the nice stuff. I've been doing lots of womb warming stuff so only eating warm food (oh how I'd love a salad but I daren't!), keeping my feet warm and am off for acupuncture tomorrow.

@user1497036202 - I'm so sorry . It's just f£&king shit isn't it? I'm so so sorry, no one should have to go through this x thinking of you and hope you have good support around you x
AFM - I'm 99% certain I'm out too. FRER (99% accurate 4 days before missed period supposedly) is stark white. I know I'm so lucky to have our DS so I know those of you on here who don't have any DC have it much harder, but I'm heartbroken for him as well as me. We have one (less good) frostie left... going to start thinking about that now, then I don't know... as can't accept its never meant to be yet, but can't keep going much longer for money/sanity/ health/life reasons.
Good luck to everyone else xx

user I am so sorry, you must be feeling crushed. It will take some time to come to terms with this, I know.

Hobbes39 don't give up yet. I have seen plenty of threads where a negative FRER becomes positive. In fact my hairdresser , who is pregnant, told me that she was 3 days late for AF and did a test and it came back negative, did another 2 days later and positive - and she had regular cycles.

AFM, we have just had follow up call with the clinic, where the doctor agreed that that the clinic had made a mistake in failing to increase my dose of progynova at the second scan. On the previous cycle, where it was increased, lining got to 9.7mm. This time only 6.3mm. I am so annoyed and disappointed. This means that as well as the extra costs of a FET cycle now, I have to wait probably another 4 months even to be able to do another cycle, as last time it took 11 weeks from the downreg injection before I had a period. I'm not getting any younger and don't really have time on my side.

Hobbs I didn't get a BFP until 19dpo with my DS so please don't count yourself out just yet. Can you schedule a blood test for your OTD so you can get complete clarity on it? Also a friend of mine didn't get a BFP until she was about 30dpo. It was driving her mad!!

@Fabuluce - was your DS from ivf? I'd love to cling on to some hope, but I just feel that the inaccuracy with tests is usually down to naturally conceived pregnancies where people actually ovulate later than they thought? I have always had at least a squinter of a line at this stage the 3 times i have been pregnant.... plus my cervix is now so low I can barely get the pessaries in...so don't want to kid myself. I'm still taking them on the chance of a miracle and they do blood test me on Friday.

Yep he was IVF. I tested at day 16 BFN. Gutted of course, especially as we'd agreed that it was going to be our last go (3rd full round of IVF, no Frosties on any round). The clinic told me to keep taking the drugs and test 3 days later. I did and got a BFP! Then I had to have a blood test that day so raced up to London and that came up positive but relatively low numbers (hence the delayed BFP) so I had to repeat the blood test 2 days later to see if it was viable. Cue more stress! Repeat blood test and the numbers tripled. Hallefuckinlujah! All in all though, almost a full week to find out if I was properly pregnant was fairly up there on my list of stressful things to do in my life so far.

Oh my goodness @Fabuluce - I've literally never heard of anyone else having an IVF BFP so late! That's amazing...! I shall cling on to the tiny shred of hope still there, thank you, but I don't want to get my hopes up.
Thank you tho xx

Totally and completely understand. Hope becomes a bit of a swearword in our household when used in conjunction with IVF. You can feel like you have nothing left and then that bastard word slips into your brain making you think maybe....just maybe.....

And yet it did in fact happen for me so you really do never know what's going to happen.

No Idea where I am with this one though. As always, all symptoms could be the drugs talking. On and off cramping, the mere whisper of boob tingling, felt vommish last night following by being starving, sleep has been on and off. Meh. Who knows!!