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Housekeeping

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This New Year, The Fledglings are Flying a new approach

824 replies

HillsBesideTheSea · 31/12/2021 16:54

Hello and welcome to new and old.

If you are new around here. Hi, introduce yourself around the fire pit in the naughty corner where we are all sitting comfortably. The naughty corner is decked out with comfy, and snacks, and a place just to have a chat when things haven't gone to plan. We are a very long running thread but do love new blood stopping by to join us.

Welcome to those who are returning.

We had a chat on the previous thread about possibly trying a new twist on the fly lady system. We all know that the fly lady system is good for establishing routines when we follow it. But we also know that sometimes we need a quick hit of a big declutter. And that life has a habit of throwing curve balls making it very difficult to stay on track.

So this is the plan. Each evening I will post the babystep, a thought point and the flylady daily focuses. We are not giving up on the fly lady system but just bringing it into line with the individuality of our lives, and trying to resolve some of the issues that comes from being the family brain, trying to do all the things and generally having modern busy lives. The thought point is to try to get you to think differently. And may require a click on a link (video), a discussion on the thread, or just you considering things. I do not promise it will make you feel better, or magically change your house straight away. But hopefully it will help with the overall flow and approach. And may just tweak the twee out of the fly lady system to the point where it is now your system.

But before you entirely regret your choices in letting my try this craziness we are going to start with some key basics that I really do think has been incorporated well into the Flylady system.

  1. the mess, disorder and chaos did not happen over night. Give yourself the grace and time to fix it. (also known as roman weren't built in a day so don't kill yourself trying to get your house immaculate in a day)
  1. Goals vs system.
We will go into this a little more shortly but to start, the fly lady system has an end goal - a house which is tidy and clean that comes second nature. It achieves it by building habits and routines that make the steps needed to achieve that goal second nature. There is a lot of research that says goals don't work, systems do. And systems are built on the formation of habits.
  1. You are never behind.
You might not be making the progress you would like, you may have taken a break. But you are not behind. So again, give yourself a break and drop the guilt. There is probably a reason why you have taken a break - illness, other demands on time, mental health etc etc. And yes some days it is an effort to make sure that everyone is fed and ok. But that is ok, so give yourself grace that on that day that was exactly what was needed and thus you succeeded in the essential goal of the day. guilt is just going to make things harder than it needs to be. It is ok not to feel guilty if you did not do all the things.

I will be back later with links for tomo. I am posting them in the evening the night before because some of us are morning people, and some of us are night people. And this way everyone will be able to see prior to when they need to consider it.

Come park your broom in the new thread for a little while and have a natter whilst we wait to bring in the New year.

OP posts:
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6
StillUp · 09/01/2022 21:38

Oops, went a bit AWOL. Just caught up with you all with a camomile tea and a hiccuppy baby on my shoulder. We’ve had a busy weekend with visitors, lunch out and a ‘family fun’ morning out.

I feel a bit guilty posting at the minute as you are all flying and I’m delegating to DH Grin. I do have some ta Das though:
😊 sorted out paperwork and found a better, more accessible, home for the files
😊 used the now-empty paperwork box to store DD1’s board games more neatly
😊 did some ironing and several LOLs, including school uniform
😊 reading and maths app with DD
😊 sorted birthday present for visiting relative
😊 finished the first of my Christmas books
😊 have been out and about for a few walks with DD2/the school run.

Welcome Battleaxe, and welcome to any newbies I’ve missed 👋

Well done on finishing the assignment That, and good luck for the next one.

Love the cakes Red. The black looks very effective.

Hope you had a lovely birthday weekend Wassailing.

IWasWillingToGoWassailing · 09/01/2022 21:44

Like the namechange, That, although I'm certain you can't be unorganised if 6 Little Thatlettes (sounds like a children's book!) are fed, clean and getting to school / nursery / naptime etc!

Red what beautiful winter cakes! You have a real talent for it.

Mc hope you get some time of your own. I remember toddlerhood being among the 18 most challenging of the Technical Mothering years 😂.

Zoo well done on the meal plan and getting "D" P to at least drive you to Sainsbury's. Hope he has not upset the system and driven you made this evening.

Ta da:
❤️ 45 min dog walk with DH
🧡 Kitchen located and DW rotated
💛 Stripped our bed
💚 Moved things up and down stairs to their correct places
💙 January work and house planning set up and partially filled in
💜 Got DH to make the Nest doorbell work from my attic so I spend less time running up and down stairs
❤️ Started to sort out my email. Turns out nothing has been back up for 2.5 years 😱. Need to pay Fasthosts more money to integrate email with Outlook, apparently 🤬
🧡 Made cheese scones to have with defrosted soup for tea
💛 2x LOL washed and dried
💚 Bed remade
💙 3 x dry LOL sorted and handed out
💜 Kitchen found again
❤️ Second dog walk - have done over 6,000 steps today which is a record since my operation
🧡 Set up Pilates things and kit for tomorrow.so I can't really duck out of it first thing
💛 Brushed teeth and run bath
💚 Got cottage pie out of the freezer for DH's andy dinner tomorrow; asked Ds3 to think about what he will have.

To do:
🐧 Have bath and defrost legs
🐧 Choose clothes for tomorrow (building good habits)
🐧 Prep breakfast and packed lunch for tomorrow
🐧 Write brain dump to clear head
🐧 Read a bit of Word Hord
🐧 Sleep, hopefully by 11.

Best get on with it before the bath goes cold, I suppose!

SingToTheSky · 09/01/2022 21:48

Ah mc toddlers are bloody exhausting and much as I loved cosleeping I absolutely recognise the need to sleep alone too! 💐

Love the highly relatable name change that!

It’s been a much more productive day today. Seem to be over the worst of the jab effects now, pain has subsided a lot it’s just the PoTS flare so I’m still getting tired quickly.

ExtremelyDetermined · 09/01/2022 21:51

Evening all,

Sing - we've just watched Encanto too, DD watched it last night and asked me to watch it with her again tonight, it was lovely. Makes a change from her asking me to watch 3 hour long Marvel films with her Grin.

Granny - welcome on board.

Red - the cakes look beautiful, as does your dresser.

Merry - I like pannetone toasted with salted butter. I've been reading Nigel Slater's Christmas Chronicles and he has a recipe for a toasted pannetone and mincemeat sandwich which I will have to try next year.

Tada!

Backed up photos from phone and made a start on organising the last two years worth for photobooks. I don't know why I always put this off, I actually find it quite relaxing when I do it, but think I have some residual anxiety dating back to a hard drive malfunction years ago when I thought I'd lost the lot (I hadn't but it took a few months to retrieve them all from an assortment of old external hard drives).

Started tax return
Did a few other admin type jobs
Weekly shop - have got out of the routine of booking my click and collect
Baked sourdough bread.
Several LOL
Took DS to football and back
Listed some decluttered things on the Olio app (it's for giving and receiving unwanted things). Agreed collection of them during the week.
Put up a picture on the living room wall (has been propped up in a corner for 2 months).
Got cans of paint and filler out and touched up wall where the holes were put in the wrong place Blush and did a few bits in other rooms too.
Put out some stuff to take to the tip next week.

Folliwng Hills "Flying Blocks" thought process, I emptied a drawer in my bedside cabinet of old card games last week. On Friday I took them to the charity shop and yesterday I found some baskets and put them in the drawer with all my nail varnishes in - I've usually got at least about 50 of them Blush. So that clears some space in the dressing table drawers that I can now move stuff off the top into. Yay! Oh and managed to only buy one new nail varnish when I was in town taking the card games to the charity shop.

frankiefirstyear · 09/01/2022 22:20

Happy Birthday wassailing! Hope you had a lovely weekend 😃

Red we must live pretty near each other 🤯😃 I've looked at all the local rescues but no matches. I will look on the KC website tomorrow thanks so much for the info! Will avert my eyes to any puppy photos, thanks for the warning 🙈

The weekends are always bonkers here so got very little 'extra' jobs done, got my booster today too so one arm is out of action for tomorrow no doubt because it's so sore and itchy today! Also feeling sick now since coming to bed 🙄.
Did get a couple of batch cooks done though so pleased with that, cooking bores me so any batching is a win for me.

Tomorrow I must try to clear out my car 😱 it's almost spilling out when I open the doors but going to take it easy other than that, I need a rest day for sure 😴

HazelNuttyElf · 09/01/2022 23:12

wassailing the insurance adjuster went on Wednesday with someone who can do the repairs. They told her 6-9 months to get it done, new kitchen, paint and ceilings through the house etc, and that's after they get done with the job they're doing, I believe. They (her and my brother) are staying at his house until it is sold and then the insurance people will find somewhere for her to live while the work is done. His house is under contract, they are just waiting for a date. Thanks for asking, I just found out today.

zoo I know cleaning isn't taking time for myself, but it did need to be done 😳

Ta Das:
🧩 rotated DW & started it
🧩 washed DS bedding and put it back on his bed
🧩 put away all clean LOLs
🧩 sorted the pantry out, now we'll be able to find things
🧩 Skyped mum
🧩 played scrabble with DH & DS
🧩 worked on some of a puzzle with DH and DS

I'm struggling right now to stay awake, so I'm thinking it's nap time, it's a little late though (just after 4pm) so I don't want to sleep for long

Ladyrattles · 09/01/2022 23:35

Sing big fans of Encanto in our house since we watched it at Christmas. I keep finding myself singing 'We don't talk about Bruno' lol

Granny welcome 👋

I got up, showered and dressed but haven't done anything in the house today. We had a lovely day out and went to Corbridge Roman Town EH site & museum. We even came back with a proper Roman helmet.

Tonight is what we call Solo Sunday... so everyone makes their own evening meal. We've been doing it for about 9 months and it's been brilliant to not worry about what people are eating one day a week... but our autistic kiddo made stir fry and it looks like a bomb siteConfused

SingToTheSky · 09/01/2022 23:50

Ha I was just coming back to ask ED if she’d had that song as an ear worm yet :o

I’ve had quite a productive day. Feeling quite restless and keen to do more stuff now, but I know I should go to bed really or tomorrow will be harder.

SingToTheSky · 10/01/2022 00:04

ta da
👣reading
👣shower
👣laundry in dryer
👣tiny bit of BRC diving
👣planned DS’ first week back to home ed with DH
👣sorted a bit of recycling
👣put up poster for Cagletini
👣diary check and weekly planner writing (Caglets’ jabs turned out to be fine)
👣wrapped DH’s presents
👣emptied and checked contents of wrapping paper box, decluttered and reorganised with bags for string etc
👣quick tidy of home ed stuff and toys
👣put laundry away
👣listened to audiobook while putting laundry away - normally watch Netflix on my phone so this was a nice change
👣painted mini chest of drawers (will be pen storage)

Going to listen to a bit more audiobook. Previous chapter was about habit stacking which turns out to be what I’ve started attempting without realising :o

Redsquirrel5 · 10/01/2022 00:31

Thank you re the cakes I enjoyed doing them this year.
ED I snuck another plate in before Christmas. I love those plates but didn’t have room for all 12 so I chose the birthday months and December. I need an August as I was sent the wrong one( eBay) however it is DS3 best friends months and he was here a lot of the time that he felt like the four son! I was busy at the time so didn’t chase it up.

Frankie I suspect Lady isn’t too far away either especially going to Corbridge. BF loves the antique shop there. I will have to get her to have a dayLady have you been to Vindolanda and Birdoswald? Both great visits for Hadrian’s Wall.

Up you have had major surgery. You don’t need to be flying yet even the fat fairy would agree. I hope you are not lifting the ironing board.

Thatsupermum would be more appropriate for you.

Hazel although it seems a long time off it will soon come around. A chance for altering the layout perhaps and choosing new cupboards, stove etc is quite exciting. Pinterest is her friend.

Sing glad the day has been productive, starts the week off well.

Started knitting a hat🙃

Redsquirrel5 · 10/01/2022 00:35

Wow what a list!

Audiobook is a good idea. Perhaps we will all be making that a habit for putting away laundry 🧺

HazelNuttyElf · 10/01/2022 01:09

Red your cakes are beautiful 😍
Mum was needing a new kitchen since the one she had wasn't functional for her any more. She had been looking at them, but kept changing her mind.

I had my nap, I feel better for it. Although I've been on the couch too long as my back is starting to ache. Good thing it's time to get up and start on dinner. Dd is now home so might actually get to play another game of scrabble with her after dinner.
🍒👋 to everyone, sorry for lack of personals

Stilllivinginazoo · 10/01/2022 05:03

redcakes are gorgeous🥰
That😁.agree with red thatsupermum would be apt!
Hazel hope your nap doesn't disturb tonight's sleep.i had one at 3(20 mins) and been awake since 2..only went bed at 11😭
Edwell-done on nail varnish rehoming.i have quite a collection.hufg tune I started wearing it again used regular paint toenails ..

HazelNuttyElf · 10/01/2022 05:42

Oh no zoo I hope you're able to get more sleep at some point. I hope I don't have any troubles, about to find out as it's time for bed 😴

Also, you've reminded me, I need to do my toe nails tomorrow night, I thought about doing them this afternoon, but had a nap instead 🤦‍♀️

GrannyBattleaxe · 10/01/2022 06:01

Thanks for your greetings everyone. @HillsBesideTheSeas I don’t mind either, Granny or Battleaxe are both fine.

My Ta-Das for yesterday
😇 Cleared the tops of all the kitchen cupboards & cleaned.
😇 Organised under the sink to put a washing-up bowl there. (A friend has done this for years, I just thought it pointless with my large family but I’m going to persevere.)
😇 Got all 10 of us out to good friends, including the teens (!!), and were all much happier after.

Today the plan is simply to drive safely as I have 7 hours of driving for a health appointment for DD4, get home and zonk out!
Happy Monday everyone.

Stilllivinginazoo · 10/01/2022 07:22

hazelnope I gave up and got up!

Tada
Cats fed
Wash on
Harpic lav
Clear and scrub dining table
Sweep living room floor
Tidy away three BRC
Deal "d"p as he didn't wait til I woke him at 7,and then kept want talk whilst I was in kitchen try do stuff- can't hear him so had keep coming back in.random twaddle not important stuff,making me want stab him in the eyes with a spoon as long sly digs about porridge taking ages.i was Manning the grill for toast for the girls and it's awkward so I not pissing around on oats til that was done as D's was having it too and he wasn't up at that point
I've already had enough of him for today!
Wash in drier
More in

The plan
About sort lunches
Try not kill him(purely as be more stuff to clear up)
Clean bathroom
Sort littertrays
Walk girls to school/pop Morrisons for new pants for lil zoo
Apparently also need go post office today(that's 30 minutes other direction,having walk 45 mins to Morrisons as he "fancies the walk")
I need be on a teams meet with camhs by 12,so it's going to have to be brisk bloody walking everywhere.FML

Stilllivinginazoo · 10/01/2022 07:23

*he's due to leave at 6pm(so can see the girls after-school).please think thoughts to get rid of him sooner or I'm go LMFS

Stilllivinginazoo · 10/01/2022 07:24

*and before anyone says tell him to piss off,D's is in his element having him here to game with all afternoon yesterday,and share stupid comments whilst rest us try listen to TV etc...

Stilllivinginazoo · 10/01/2022 07:25

I will now stop spamming you guys and go get dressed and sort lunches for school run

HillsBesideTheSea · 10/01/2022 07:44

Morning Zoo good to have you back spamming us first thing in the morning.

Ok so it is week 2.
Monday is home bleurgh. (home blessing but with less twee)
baby step: yesterday was the room rescue (i think i forgot to post) and today is the power of 15mins
Launch pad here

OP posts:
HillsBesideTheSea · 10/01/2022 08:28

Thinking point is one about blocking habits.

What habits and 5things do you do that stop you making process towards your goal? In this house we are very good at the setting up and the doing, but terrible at the putting away. So things get left half finished, tools get left because you might do some more of that. What ever the reason the end result is that clutter builds up simply because it was not put away, things become harder to find. What things can you work on to reduce the impact of this?

OP posts:
SingToTheSky · 10/01/2022 08:48

Interesting thought point hills!

Granny wow ten of you! Definitely deserve a medal for getting everyone ready and out!

I’m sleepy and haven’t got up properly yet, I’ve done my teeth and listened to a couple of chapters (including noting a few studies that may be useful for one of the assignments in my course) but the next time I get up I need to get in the shower and the thought of that is exhausting 😳

Want to get lots done today. Back to maths tutoring tomorrow and need to prepare. Also didn’t get a chance to talk to DD1 about studying etc so really must prioritise that.

Slingingcontest · 10/01/2022 08:53

Hi all, good morning, sorry I can't keep up with thread, aargh, and we are not half way through January yet! Grin Grin

A warm welcome to Granny and all newcomers I have missed! Hope newcomers getting on ok!

Those cakes are amazing RedSquirrel bravo! I love your dresser too!
Good luck with getting hands on medical appt. Have you considered that pain might be exacerbated by stress ? (It came on just before you went out I mean, and you had a lot of pain over Christmas ; apologies if I am way off but DD gets that sometimes when she is stressed, all the tension goes to her stomach - although she also has a functional issue too - but stress induced pain very real and no joke.) Hope you manage to get it sorted anyway! Flowers

Sorry your mother's house is going to take so long to reconstruct Hazel Sad That sounds really stressful for everyone Flowers

Sorry your morning has been so stressful already Zoo and good luck with meeting today!

Glad you had a good birthday Willow!

And glad you are delegating Stillup! Smile. Hope baby hiccups fleeting!

Bravo for getting your assignment done That; you are a machine! Star

I like the idea of solo Sunday Ladyrattles!

Frankie I really sympathize with you being without a dog! Fwiw, both of our dogs were private adoptions owing to (1) new baby in one owner's family and (2) divorce in another. We didn't pay anything for either dog. They both arrived when they were quite young (about 5 years apart). They were both quite damaged in many ways Sad . The first (we discovered gradually) had been locked in garden shed Sad not socialised at all, didn't know how to walk on a lead, was afraid of everything, had skin, teeth and sight issues, hadn't had proper vaccinations so had a weakened immune system , was very nervous and bit all of us in the first year and we nearly had to re-home him again but happily we soldiered on. (He is now a true gentleman, very respectful and is the apple of my eye Grin). You have to be careful of him on the rare occasion he is injured though but that's all! (Certainly makes getting to vet entertaining!) The second had been carried about in a bag Hmmand had her claws painted with nail varnish and didn't know she was a dog Sad very gentle but very intelligent/active/barky and slightly loopy and we are still working on her - both are happy lovely dogs now - who get lots of exercise and freedom to dig - but overall I wouldn't recommend private adoption without the support of a shelter unless you are really, really committed and open to the fact that previous owners will not be telling you the whole truth and you may have a long road ahead of you in terms of re-training and many vets bills! The fact that dog (1) walked straight out of his former home and in to our car without a backward glance, all those years ago, should have been a clue!

Cocker spaniels really lovely but you have to avoid some strains of the red variety who get "the rage"apparently although there is controversy over whether that is an actual thing or not.

Anyway Frankie wishing you the best of luck with finding "the one" ; they do say that in actual fact they find you Grin. I am certain it will happen soon! So many lockdown puppies now being abandoned very sadly Sad.

Mc3209 hope you have time to recharge a bit Flowers

ED I need to follow your good example and do a digital declutter!

Great lists Sing and Merry!

Hope all ok Hills and you are not overdoing it!

Sorry, cannot scroll any longer! But best wishes to everyone and hope you all have a successful and productive Flying week!

Incidentally, I love panettone (which should NOT be dry!) . Unfortunately for my waistline I have eaten a slice with some leftover fruit salad for breakfast!

ExtremelyDetermined · 10/01/2022 09:10

Hills - I wish I knew. DH is the absolute worst for this, it's not even because he thinks he'll do more of whatever it is, it seems that as soon as the job in hand is finished his brain switches off and he doesn't see anything after that. It's not just the equipment, it's for example the old part which he has replaced with a new one. He replaced our bathroom door handle a couple of years ago and the old one sat on the floor in the dining room for a year before I finally said something about it. I noticed it every single time I walked through the room, he never did. It does also mean things get lost, replaced and then found again hence us owning about 5 tape measures but never being able to find one.

ExtremelyDetermined · 10/01/2022 09:15

I actually think he just has a different view on untidyness, that it is all equal and that whoever is tidying will just tidy everything away regardless of who left it there. Whereas I think that to a large extent everyone should be responsible for their own things or the stuff they have used, with exceptions such as the person who cooked not having to clear the kitchen (but they should make some effort as they go along).

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