It's July, Fledglings are Flying towards Freedom (hopefully!)

[EverythingDelegated]

Hello and welcome to the July 2021 Fledgling Flylady Thread. Thank you Willow for an excellent pair of June threads. Welcome to one and all, old hands and newbies, lurkers and longtime posters and anyone in between. This thread keeps us vaguely on track with Flylady and is where we post our Ta Das and Yes Ta Das (what we did yesterday 😁), our To Dos and To Didn'ts, and discuss anything that comes to mind (often not housekeeping!).

The beauty of Flylady is that you are never behind, the whole system repeats every month, just jump in wherever. The aim is to gradually get into good habits and regular routines that keep the house ticking over rather than having a huge blitz on it.

To help you with this I'll be posting links to Flyady's Flight Plan and other useful parts of the website, which is updated daily, it's also good to go in and have a browse (some of it is a bit twee though). Do NOT sign up for the emails, you will be inundated.

The system divides the house up into weekly zones, then in each zone there will be timefor decluttering, a small daily task (the Mission) and each day of the week has a theme too (eg Errand Day). You can switch things around to suit your circumstances, there is a weekly Sneak Peek page to help you plan ahead. There are also 31 Babysteps, small daily habits to adopt (eg wearing shoes around the house if you'd rather not). Finally Flylady wants you to make time for you and your family, so weekends are more relaxed.

Jargon
Flylady (and the thread!) has a little bit of her own peculiar jargon it can help to know:
S&S - swish and swipe - a quick go round a bathroom or cloakroom to keep it acceptably fresh
LoL load of laundry. We are not collapsing into hysterical laughter over the state of our washing baskets
Hotspots any areas that tend to collect clutter no matter how often you clear them - mine is definitely the corner of the worksurface by the kitchen door, and the bookshelf at the bottom of the stairs
5 minute room rescue a quick whizz round any room to create a semblance of order
Weekly Home Blessing (often Home Bleugh here) - an hour a week to keep the house acceptable. I think this can only be done in an hour if you only have one bed in the house to change, so take it with a pinch of salt. I spread mine over the week as I cannot get it down to an hour and don't have an hour to give to it either.
Ned and Ted - imaginary friends often draughted in to assist with washing and ironing
BRC Bag, or box, of Random Crap
(D)LMS (Didn't) Lose My Shit - often a necessary acronym around spouses and teens!
Naughty Corner - the thread's imaginary space for rest and recuperation when it all gets too much. Often stocked with soft cushions, blankets, drinks and snacks. May or may not have a free bar, fire place, sunloungers, hot and cold running barmen etc.
Cherry waves 🍒👋 - lovely type for cheery wave that stuck!
All Fed and No One Dead - a good outcome to a busy day.

The beauty of Flylady is that is can be adapted to any household setup - lots of DC or just one, or none; a partner / spouse, or ex, or those going it alone; those working within or outside the home; shiftwork, you name it.

Our motto is No Fledgling Left Behind, so if you are a returner or a lurker, welcome on board, there is always space her for more Fledglings.

Zoo 💐

po3.whatever
❗️Phone psychiatrist again re meds
❗️Eat something proper
❗️Laundry away while watching something on my phone

sing - very well done. Enjoy the rest of your afternoon!

zoo - I am truly sorry to read what's been going on. You'll be able to clarify matters with Social Services. Withholding snacks for a very good reason should not be a problem. not looking forward to having a teen

On note masks, how's everyone feeling about rule change?
zoo - I'm not sure what the rules will be up here but I will continue to wear a mask in indoor spaces and maintain social distancing. We don't have any family to see here and have been seeing friends online. Not sure when we'll make it back to work in a workplace. I have ordered nice new masks which were on sale so that I am à la mode

ah MC I thought I saw a very early morning post this morning from you. That is rubbish of dh. Is it any consolation to you that Michelle Obama had much the same problem with Barack in that he was a little tardy getting up in the night for their first child? She fixed it by going to the gym at 5am - she got a workout and he had to deal with baby. Not sure gym at 5 would be your solution but it's sobering that the Leader of the Free World was reluctant to deal with his own child baby. I think it's just men see kidmin

hope glad it's not just me.some of the posts on MN make me feel like I'm a right over nervous Nellie!

Tada
Short nap
Made pumpkin falafel
Bit more front room sorting

Still needs work

Oh Zoo what a little madam she is being. I would be so upset. In years to come she will hopefully realise and apologise. Meanwhile I hope you get support.

Sing marvellous fingers crossed.

MC perhaps he will enjoy him more as he gets older. DH wasn’t that great with them as babies.

I have been for my last app. Counsellor said I have come a long way. She has been lovely to work with. I and free to ring for an appointment in the future if I need one.
I wanted to go to a friend’s cafe afterwards for lunch but DH said no. I am really annoyed because a few weeks ago I suggested we went after my appointment. I was feeling great and wanted to go as a bit of a celebration to moving on. I really get fed up with him. We only go out on his terms. Petty but next time I won’t be willing. I wanted to go and support them. They had the pub and couldn’t risk losing the money when lockdown came as they had to renew the lease. Then end of last year they found this cafe. They have put loads of work into it and it was their opening day today.

Kitchen.
Cleaned the wall unit this morning while waiting for the kettle to boil.
Took load of books to Hospice Bookshop.
Asked a very nice lady about volunteering. Can do half a day or full day several to chose from. Going to apply after end of July. I will start on half a day a week. Quite pleased with self for asking about it.

Pm
Wiped top of dresser.
Removed all ornaments and cleaned.
Cleaned dresser.
Washed window sill
Polished.
Removed flowers with green white fly.
Put brushes away in shed.

Just need to wipe bottom units fronts.

red how frustrating of dh

Just spoken to someone from school offering D's placement for sept.its a hub within the schoolwith own entry point and fenced outside area.its capacity is 20,10 will be start sept from year 7-11.all are expected to be like ds- "high functioning"-bloody hate that terminology...but with significant anxiety issues.i do hope it's the right fit.hard to tell really as it's not even up and running.a big leap of faith but tbh I haven't got a better option I can ask for instead..

More washing done
Lil zoo in a mood
Dd2 in panicking stress and working self into a frenzy about having a stranger in the camp tom

Just catching up on the thread while I’m relaxing, and have half an eye on the football. Before the match we all worked together to get the stuff ready for the metal collectors - turned out we have much more than we thought, and I’ve also made a separate little pile of stuff they might class as worth taking. DH also removed the baby gates (they’re screw fit and we haven’t actually used them in forever) so lots of stuff leaving the house.

In sorting this though I discovered yet more hidden BRCs 😭😬 and some Christmas stuff too?! So that’s some stuff to sort tomorrow.

Also discovered some spilled paint and now seem to have it on my trousers, so I guess it’s LOL time.

Ah shit, the mood has somewhat dropped in the house now ⚽️😩

🤞 for you Sing although it sounds like you did well in the interview. It's so nice when things leave the house too, or even just put away where it belongs.
zoo 💐 for dealing with teenagers - they're hard work.
Red sorry DH was being such an arse, was there no way you could have gone to your friends cafe by yourself. Definitely go next time you have the opportunity.

These last few days have been busy, I don't want to type a long post so I'll try to keep my ta das brief. It was the 4th of July weekend here so decided to use USA flags - it also meant I had a 4 day weekend.
🇺🇲 Rearranged living room with help from DH
🇺🇲 Went bulk shopping
🇺🇲 Had dinner at ILs x2
🇺🇲 Helped ILs with their fence
🇺🇲 Watched fireworks x2
🇺🇲 Went to the parade on Monday
🇺🇲 Did gel on my nails - fingers & toes
🇺🇲 Worked today 10hrs
🇺🇲 Expanded the fire pit area, after work today, now it's ready for our fire pit, which is at SILs house
🇺🇲 Got my lunch and clothes ready for tomorrow (I usually do though when I work the next day).
Sorry there's not more personals, it's late here and I'm so tired. 🍒👋 to everyone

Interesting 🤔 my flags showed up as UM - whatever that is 🤷‍♀️
I wonder if this works 🇺🇸

I can see the flags :)

I haven’t slept 🤦🏽‍♀️😵‍💫

I had forgotten this happened when I first started the meds and it’s such that even a few days off can make a difference (it’s not one that builds up like SSRIs etc). Also probably still wired from the whole experience really. However my sanity is still intact and I’m just rolling with it 🤣 I won’t be able to nap while DH has his zoom appt though as that’s when the people are coming to take the metal stuff.

I’m guessing I won’t get the other planned decluttering done today though 🤣

Morning all,

Today's flight plan is here.

Our mission is to scrub our kitchen counters. Thursday is Errand Day and our monthly habit is Swish and Swipe

Babysteps - I keep forgetting to post these. Small steps that build to become a regular routine - here is a link that takes you through all of them (there are also separate daily links at the bottom of the Flight Plan Page) babysteps

Morning. I've been awol and far from flying - just coping with work.

Po3:
-load dw to max and put on
-lol
-put clean laundry away

Any news Sing?

First po3 done plus I've filled and put out a bag for charity that's being collected today. Only one bag out this time but it's still an out!

Zoo sorry to hear you've got these troubles going on. Is she particularly skinny or something? I think it's odd for school to take not being able to help herself to snacks as a cause for concern - lots of people parent that way don't they?

Think I got a couple of hours’ sleep in the end. Aaargh.

Nothing yet honey but they have another day of interviewing today as they have two different vacancies. Apparently everyone will hear today (phone if yes, email if no) and I’m wondering if it’s possible to simultaneously check my email and not check it 😳

po3.1
❗️Get dressed
❗️Other meds with a drink and breakfast
❗️Get DS set up to start maths

Oooh sing - fingers crossed for you.

Busy morning in work so no flying done. Dismal day here but contemplating a walk. Need to do a quick tidy.

I have an errand to run.

I keep thinking it's Friday today. Totally bamboozled because of it.

This thread moves fast but I have been trying to read. zoo sounds like it's full on with the teenagers. I also have a teenage "high functioning" boy. I hate that term too. I don't know about you, but I am finding that now DS is a teen, his A is really showing. He has also got really clingy and this can get emotionally exhausting. This is on top of DP having only gone back to work after x months of stress and me having just come off my meds. We are a mess.

sing fingers crossed. It's nerve-racking (or is it wracking? I can never remember) waiting to hear.

Honey-Badger - surviving work is just enough sometimes.

Anyway, I do have ta-das to report:

Swept futility room
Side tracked into cleaning and organising the tool box (I don't know why but, hey-ho it does look neat!)
LOL put away.
LOL washed and out to dry.
Put away everything on landing windowsill hot-spot
Put away clothes and tidied up the towels on the bannister
Took mum shopping to buy bits and pieces for family wedding
Washed up breakfast stuff

I'm really flummoxed as the date and time on my laptop taskbar has disappeared. Anyone know how to get it back? I've looked at Taskbar settings but...

I have loads of work to do this weekend for work. I try not to work at home as I'm not paid but needs must unfortunately.

Quiet today!

Well done on your ta da yup and I too have “high functioning” DCs… in fact I’m diagnosed autistic at “high functioning” level myself and I also hate the term!

Didn’t get the job. However the manager phoned me rather than emailing as she wanted to give feedback and she explained they were really impressed with my interview (and that they’ve had great feedback from my supervisor about my volunteering). But they’ve gone with someone who was already doing this exact role in another charity.

So I’m pretty pleased with that really, although obviously disappointed as I would love the job. But it does at least seem to imply that I am capable of it.

What next?! I’ve kind of put everything else on hold to apply for this, so now I need to think of what else to do to round out my experience. But I’m definitely giving myself a few days off from that to get some other stuff done.

Sorry the job didn't come off, Sing, but great feedback there. Take some time to think about where you could take this next.

Yup no idea about the task bar, sorry! I too have a high functioning autist who masked for years before diagnosis at 14 and my is she is a feisty one. I too loathe the label, it doesn't allow for the things they do find hard and makes it seem like the academic side is everything. Well done on your ta das.

Zoo have you told LilZoo how much of a bomb she may have set off with her false disclosure to get back at you? I know she's unhappy and struggling, but I would find it very hard to tolerate such manipulation even if SS are going to see straight through it once you show them the stuff from the ED clinic. As to binding, I'd suggests a sports bra. I suspect part of what she's struggling with is that so many teen bras as padded now, for "modesty" and larger girls really don't need it.

I thoroughly enjoyed my day off, it was SO QUIET. I sat in the living room sewing in silence and it was so lovely. I did have to spend most of yesterday running round like a mad thing as a result, though.

Ta das:
❤️ Accepted DH's delivery of tropical fish before 8am
🧡 Properly scrubbed the bathroom
💛 2 x LOL
💚 Made the bed and tidied up my dressing table
💙 Fed DS3 and got him through early lessons and homework
💜 Hunted for some notes from 11 years ago that I think I put out 🤬
🤎 Received IKEA parcel of my new sewing chair. Found it had base and seat but no pneumatic pole to join the two 🤦
🖤 Sent an email about Cornish tin mining.
❤️ Arranged for DM to send DS1 a birthday present.
🧡 Walked up to town for benelyn for DD, who has a shocker of a cold, and accidentally came home with Belgian buns 🤭
💛 Sat in garden with DH to eat my bun
💚 Had a nap
💙 Had DD's meds review online

Ok,.today is not as much of a write off as I thought! Was afraid I'd had a Totally Useless Thursday.😁

Think I will put tea in to cook (chicken tikka with rice) and go and sort the clean washing out.

Historically though high functioning was only used to clarify that with support this individual is capable of functioning independantly in society, as apposed to low functioning which was used to denote an individual who would never be able to independently live in society.
which is why it is often applied to downs and autism.
It sucks but that is why it is what it is.

I am not back. Still technology issues.

Zoo

zoo Just adding to IWillWash advice about binders. Im pretty sure binders can cause short term and long term health problems for developing breasts. My friend persuaded her daughter to wear a high impact sports bra, but only for school, not all the time. Her daughter was happy with the compromise tbf. Hopefully your DD will be too.

Well done sing - good things will come of this even though you didn't get the job on this occasion.

Glad quiet day went well willow. Really annoying about the missing chair part. 🐟🐠🐡 Was it fish for tea so? 😉😁

It’s amazing how terms change in meaning whether officially or not - and how the weight of them changes IYSWIM.

I am having quite a useless evening, DH has two slightly overlapping zoom meetings tonight and is also collecting DD1 from dance. She didn’t want to go tonight despite begging me to book last night having missed lots due to isolating. She’s really anxious at the moment, not eating properly etc and then getting anxious about the fact she’s not eating properly and has apparently lost weight. I feel like she’s a bit burned out maybe, but I’ve no clue what to do about it, especially because she is the opposite to me in her need for alone time - she can’t handle it.

I’ve updated various people on the job hunting and sent an email about tap class next week. I had so much j wanted to get done today but I think I will just make sure I get the laundry in the dryer and that’ll be about it.

I had a long sofa nap earlier too 😳

Tomorrow I have a phone call from the national careers service to talk through my CV etc so that will be useful (I would’ve kept it even if I’d got the job). Also DS needs shoes so might need to send DH to town with him.

That's interesting Hills. I'm assuming no one says low functioning anymore. (Thank goodness.) Just the high functioning has remained.

Oh and the psychiatrists never phoned back so I’m unmedicated again. Thankfully it just seems to be tiredness and brain fog so far - I still have my anxiety meds so it’s really more the functioning that is affected which is frustrating but hopefully my mood can remain vaguely stable and I’ll just be sleepy and useless 🤣 I suppose clutching at straws some people swear by having breaks from their adhd meds so maybe this will be good in the long run 🙄

Soooo much metal stuff left the house today for free which is great. Hopefully I can get some decent sleep tonight and resume decluttering tomorrow.