University packing lists including condoms: is this now standard advice?

[Maybeshesbornwithitmaybeitssertraline]

My ds2 has got his essential packing list for university, including condoms. I know, better to do it safely than not but really?

When I was 18 you only needed condoms if you were in a long term relationship. Is it so different these days?

I'll admit that I'm struggling with the idea that my 18 year old us old enough to go to university so the idea of him needing condoms as well is a bit out of my comfort zone.

Most 18-19 year olds will have sex. No harm at all - and possibly some good - reminding them of the need to be safe.

Do you seriously think that 18 year olds only have sex inside a long term relationship? That wasn't true when I was 18, nearly 40 years ago!

And it's his packing list. Not yours. You don't have to go out and buy them for him.

I was handed lots of condoms at a Freshers Fair in 1991 with advice about no petroleum based lubes, HIV risk reduction if having anal sex, & using for vaginal sex even if on hormonal contraception to prevent STI transmission.

Not sure it was on the packing list but we bought them a few packets

Manchester uni did a kit for new students (Well their student union did), condoms, pot noodle and tampax.
There may have been other things.

Blimey how old are you @Maybeshesbornwithitmaybeitssertraline ? I was born in 1955 and your attitude was old fashioned when I left school in 1973 . Most girls i knew were having sex at 16.

If you have a child just off to Uni then I’m assuming you’re a similar age to me (my DCs are 18 and 20). So we were probably teens/young adults around the same time. I don’t know where you grew up but where I was, condoms were getting a lot of use. Hardly anyone was in a long-term relationship but there was plenty of sex going on. Condoms are essential, especially for short-term/one night events.

Are you very religious perhaps? Your experience and viewpoint is quite unusual for someone of your generation (I’m assuming you’re most likely between 45-55 years old).

when DS1 went to uni , his younger brother made him a photo frame with a condom behind the glass and words that said

‘in case of miracle break glass’

DS1 was not amused! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

It has been 25 years plus since I started University and they were handed out in welcome pack and available in the Student Union building. Sex is not limited to long term relationship.

Would you rather he get someone pregnant or get an STI? People have sex, better its safe sex. Pretending your kid 'doesn't do that' or 'isn't old enough' is what results in high teen pregnancy rates. Education on safe sex reduces the rates.

Same here. I was 17.

I find this attitude really quite bizarre. Why wouldn’t a teenager want to have sex? It’s a nice thing to do and feels lovely and we are programmed to procreate. Treating its like it’s a moral failing is so odd. It’s teenagers who biologically should be having lots of sex as they are more likely to have healthy babies than someone like me who had a baby at 38.

i’ve had a kit in my house with various supplies since my child turned 12. Better safe than sorry. It will be going with her to university.

And no, being prepared has not encouraged sexual activity. Education and preparation are just precautions.

love that

Did you miss the news about the AIDS/HIV crisis?

There were boxes of free condoms in uni when I started 30 years ago...

I’m interested OP on what was advised for casual sex when you were 18 then? I went to university in 2000 and got loads of free condoms at the freshers fair and they were all used!!

Sounds sensible to me.

@TorroFerney ? You have a house and presumably a stable relationship! You undoubtedly have had a career and not had to put it off due to caring for a baby or indeed not completing your university course! Teenage pregnancies have fallen a lot because many dc are a lot more sensible! 18 is too young for a baby but you are a bit late!

Condoms were def around in freshers fairs over 30 years ago when I was at uni! Def not a new thing.
Best to have them than not, basically.

That’s hysterical 😂

Oh OP honestly!
I am going to assume you yourself haven't been to university??
I went to 30 years ago and they were handing out condoms at the Freshers fair. This is not a new thing at all.
You don't have to have sex btw and many certainly don't but it's just better safe than sorry.

Same!!!

Had to take one of my first year flatmates to get an STI check and then sit with him while he found out he had clap… so yes I do think it’s probably a good thing. I think they should also provide them some basic info about STIs as my friend thought he’d “be able to see or smell if she had clap”. Also had to sit with a few girls who were taking pregnancy tests in my time at uni and while I never experienced it, it was really scary for them.

I didn’t wait til uni, as soon as my girls were about 15/16 and going out I bought them a box each and have some in the bathroom. I’ve also told them many many times if they are having sex they need to use them. They don’t love talking about it but it’s too important not to.

I'm a bit surprised that he's 18 and you haven't already made sure he has condoms, uni or not. When my DC were around 16 I made sure they knew there were condoms in the bathroom they could take if needed. I most definitely made sure they packed some for uni.
If you haven't talked to him before about safe sex and consent do it soon.