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General health

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Original poster

Please help Embarrassing problem

118 replies

TearfulAndAshamed · 27/03/2011 18:47

Testing namechange

OP posts:

Original poster

TearfulAndAshamed · 29/03/2011 12:35

They called back i have to go back in at 3.15pm.Im going to curl up on the sofa and try to stop crying.

OP posts:

marriednotdead · 29/03/2011 13:13

Hiya. It IS going to get better, promise.

While you're in the chemist, pick up some Bachs Rescue Remedy. I'd really recommend it for the shock/stress you're going through ATM.

Good luck with your appointment

TheVisitor · 29/03/2011 17:02

How have you got on?

cabbageroses · 29/03/2011 17:50

so can I just pick brains here- more for my education and my DD than me as I am ancient and married...

but I thought you could only get herpes if the partner had an active sore.

If they have had it but are sympton free, and condoms don't stop it- well, you could get it from anyone. Yes?

How on earth are you suposed to avoid a symptom-free disease which is transmittted skin to skin- if that is right?

HooverTheHamaBeads · 29/03/2011 17:56

cabbage that is right.

Unfortunately is is possible to catch the virus from someone without an actively shedding sore, I think the term is asymtomatic transfer or shedding.

I have always worried I am going to infect my DC's unwittingly because of this. I am of course highly vigilant and super-careful when I have a sore on my lip but always think what is the chance of passing it to them when I am healthy and sore free?

Herpes is a bitch.

HooverTheHamaBeads · 29/03/2011 17:59

T&A based on the severity of all your symptoms you should be back under GP care.

spiderslegs · 29/03/2011 18:53

FWIW - please don't be ashamed, I unwittingly gave my ex-H herpes, turned out I'm an asymptomatic carrier, it happens & it's no-one's fault.

Hope you feel better soon. He too was really ill & I felt rotten (although he turned out to be a bastard which made me feel a little bit better in the end).

Original poster

TearfulAndAshamed · 29/03/2011 19:49

hi i went back to the clinic and saw an absolutely lovely doctor she was so kind.I have an infection now on the blisters inside where they are rubbing.She gave me some great saline tubes which i can squeeze over and more cream as well as antibiotics for infection and strong painkillers so i can sleep.

I told Dp this evening i was shaking.I had to tell him over the phone.He was so great he said given the fact it can lay dormant he could have given it to me or vice versa.He has never had any symptoms but then until then neither had i.Although docs have said this is definitely my primary infection.Dp said 'I love you and i want to marry you so ill be here permanently to look after you if it happens again'.He is going to get checked for everything although i said to him i'm pretty sure that unless he is having an outbreak Herpes wont show up anyway.Am i right in thinking that?

Thank you everyone for telling me to get back to the clinic.I just hope now with all the pills it starts to clear up soon.

OP posts:

HooverTheHamaBeads · 29/03/2011 19:55

T&A glad you went back and that you saw a nice Dr too.

That primary outbreak is the worst and you'll not have another one like it although you may still have lesser outbreaks.

Gosh your DP sounds like a honey, what a lovely response.

marriednotdead · 29/03/2011 20:05

Sounds like the best possible outcome in terms of your DP.

I hope you start to feel better very quickly, and that you get some sleep tonight. There's one less thing on your mind anyway

marriednotdead · 29/03/2011 20:06

And yes, unless it is active in his system then tests will show negative.

nanatothree · 29/03/2011 20:36

Vaseline and more vaseline.Works for sore anythings!! We use it on babies bums to stop them being sore. Try it - loads of it!

Eurostar · 29/03/2011 21:37

I'm not at all sure about vaseline. The main advice with h sores is to let them breath so they can scab and heal over- i.e. no underwear if possible - I wouldn't use vaseline unless a GUM doc endorses it.

Glad to hear your DP reacted so well. Some people have no symptoms and some just tiny spots so they don't get diagnosis. It's a funny old virus but follow up outbreaks are hardly ever as bad as the first and it's not dangerous except when a woman has a primary outbreak during childbirth so again, no need to worry too much about it.

Original poster

TearfulAndAshamed · 29/03/2011 22:40

Thank you marriednotdead,Eurostar and everyone else.

I thought that about vaseline too that it would stop the sores scabbing over.Unfortunately cant really get away with no underwear due to the discharge.Does anyone know roughly how long it will take before i can pee normally again.I'm moving away.I need to travel quite a distance to sign rental contract for my new house and at the moment i wouldnt cope with a long journey.

OP posts:

marriednotdead · 30/03/2011 07:58

It should be a bit less agonising in a day or two, especially when some of the medication kicks in.

Sounds daft but could you get a kiddies rubber ring to sit on in the car? It would take the pressure off of your 'bits'.

HooverTheHamaBeads · 30/03/2011 09:51

I would not use vaseline, just what the GUM have given you.

Is the peeing normal yet? You can pee while pouring jug of warm water over yourself, start the jug first then pee. Use either homemade saline or water with 1 drop tea tree oil to keep your bits clean. I did this after childbirth when I had lots of stitches. Was recommended lots of pelvic floors with stitches too (draws blood to the area to aid healing) perhaps that could help you too?

SlightlyJaded · 30/03/2011 10:12

Oh good news. So things are definitely looking up OP.
DP has reacted well - marriage? that may win a prize for the most unexpectedly timed proposal ever
Your Dr is aware of and treating the infection. Good
You will never have an outbreak this bad again
And the pain will only reduce now.

Keep treating it as prescribed and just go 'knickerless' when you can.

wobletta69 · 30/03/2011 14:55

I'm brand new here so just checking with a test post before I launch into some advice and then realise I am on the wrong thread!

wobletta69 · 30/03/2011 15:00

Right

Same thing happened to me years ago. Caught from my DP (who I went on to marry) and he never had any visible outbreak either and never did.

My first oubreak was awful and the pain on peeing was so bad I ended up in A&E. They prescribed Xylocaine (think that is what it is called and I also think you can get it over the counter)

Basically it numbs the whole area. Apply for 2 mins or so before you need to pee and it numbs everything! You can then pee in bliss, free of pain!

I only ever had one other tiny outbreak, otherwise have been sympom free for 14yrs. Best wishes

wobletta69 · 30/03/2011 15:08

I meant to add that I would check with your own doctor first that it is safe for you to use as it is an anaesthetic lotion I think .

DitheringDoofus · 30/03/2011 15:27

So glad your DP was so supportive (he sounds like a keeper!). And I really hope you're feeling better soon xx

cabbageroses · 30/03/2011 16:37

OP- I do hope you are okay.
This soundslike a nightmare disease- basically, you can get it from someone who is symptom free- always has been and then gives it to you.

if I am ever single again I thik I shall be celibate- how on earth can you protect yourself if the man is a carrier but has no symptoms- and can't be tested to show positive without any symptoms?

It sounds like a bad case of Russian roulette.

Original poster

TearfulAndAshamed · 30/03/2011 19:17

Hello everyone.Today hasnt been good.I thought i was getiing better but i have a headache from hell that i cant shift.I had to keep dcs off school today as i couldnt walk this morning.

As for the peeing ive given up ive tried shower,bath and jug of water but its like peeing acid it feels like it hurts from the inside so uretha is probably infected too.The gunk/discharge is getting me down still lots of it and i know this is grim but i have to keep ahem seperating my bits as its like they weld together.

Wobletta69 thanks i will try and get some of that tomorrow now.

Cabbage Yes unfortunately can catch it from someone symptom free.I guess a partner would have to tell you they had it.All my exes i made sure we both got an std check before ditching the condoms.I think its terrible how there isnt more information readily available.The Gum should explain about herpes on all visits as i always presumed i was being tested for it.

I really appreciate everyones support.Ive always just thought herpes was something people that had numerous partners and didnt use protection got.I also never considered that it would cause so much pain and distress.

OP posts:

Original poster

TearfulAndAshamed · 30/03/2011 19:27

Ive read up that the first outbreak of herpes can last for six weeks I dont know i can cope that long

OP posts:

marriednotdead · 30/03/2011 19:31

Stop reading! The chances of it lasting that long are slim, please try to believe that the light at the end of the tunnel is not so far away.

Poor old you ((hug))

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