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Original poster

Do you cook separate meals for you/dh and the kids?

134 replies

pinkwhistle · 07/02/2005 04:21

Just wondering how many mumsnetters cook something for their children different to what the "grown ups" are having?

I know it is sometimes necessary to modify meals for very little ones, but ds is a bit fussy and also dd has certain allergies I have to be careful of, so I sometimes make one thing for them and something else for us! Maybe about twice a week...

I have a friend with a 6 yr old dd and 2 teenage ds's, and she regularly cooks 3 different things - one for her, one for dd and one for the boys!

Anyone else?

OP posts:
nailpolish · 07/02/2005 08:07

i only cook something different if dd doesnt like what we are having. she always wants the same as us anyway!

i can understand the problems with allergies though, must be difficult. i think its more important to all eat together, rather than what you are having

lowcalCOD · 07/02/2005 08:09

noI try and do either the same or variations on a theme

ie spag bol for all
or pork casserol with oilives etc added for us

collision · 07/02/2005 08:11

I dont do any cooking as DH does it all! We tend to modify what we are eating for ds 1 who is 3 and he will eat earlier than us so he often eats something different. However, if the kids were all eating together then I would not cook something different for each of them.

skerriesmum · 07/02/2005 08:11

We usually all eat the same dinner but will sometimes substitute one item, e.g. 2 year old doesn't like salmon so I'll give him fish fingers instead!

skerriesmum · 07/02/2005 08:12

And I've found I'm rediscovering "childrens food", sausages and beans are really good!

Freckle · 07/02/2005 08:12

During the week, the boys have school lunches, so I normally only do a light tea for them and something cooked for dh and me later. At weekends the boys normally have what we're having, unless they have a sudden craving for burgers and suchlike, which I won't touch. I always have to cook something slightly different for dh as he doesn't eat meat and I don't see why we should all miss out.

marialuisa · 07/02/2005 13:56

No, she eats what we eat, even when it's a take-away.

Beansmum · 07/02/2005 13:58

No, ds is 8 months and I usually have what he is having, slightly modified. So I eat a lot of cheese sauce and tomatoey sauce and bolognese! Maybe I should make him eat what I'm having not the other way around

Hulababy · 07/02/2005 13:59

Sometimes we do. But that is mainly as I don't eat meat and DH and DD do. So I am often the odd one out. Where possible I do variations of the same thing though, or sometimes if DH and me are eatng later DD will have something different.
Example: tonight DH and I are having tuna, but DD isn't so keen and prefers salmon - so she is having that. But we will all have rice and veggies.

Lonelymum · 07/02/2005 14:01

No, not as a rule although I relented and bunged some fish fingers under the grill the other day when I was cooking fish pie and ds1 (not fusyy generally) said he would rather go to bed hungry than eat it. I felt cross with myself for giving in, but, as I say, he is not normally fussy, and it seemed a small thing to do.

zubb · 07/02/2005 14:03

Just one meal, unless one of us is late and then I'll feed the kids and we'll eat later.
We have had to introduce more child-friendly meals - we have mashed potato now! - but the kids will also eat quite spicy things now, and I try introducing new meals most weeks.

iota · 07/02/2005 14:09

we eat a lot of highly spiced food, so often have something different from the kids. However ds2 will eat a lot of suitable family meals, ds1 has a very limited diet (self-imposed) and would rather starve than eat what we eat.

Ameriscot2005 · 07/02/2005 14:09

We all eat the same.

moondog · 07/02/2005 14:43

We've always eaten at the same time and,from about 10 months onwards,have all eaten the same thing.
It is so important for families to eat together. This was sacred when we were children and it remains so.
Two things I just DON'T get.

Fussy eaters. What's that all about? Who earns the money. Who does the shopping? Who's in charge? If they're hungry they'll eat.That's it.

'Children's food'.I would rather die than feed a fish finger,baked beans,sausages,sausage rolls,chicken nuggets,tinned spaghetti or anything of this ilk to my children, myself or indeed anyone else.

Children enjoy a drop of Claret with their dinner as well.
Bleeaaaargh!!!!!!

Freckle · 07/02/2005 14:45

Clearly you've never had to deal with a fussy eater. Children will not always eat what is put in front of them, even if there is nothing else on offer. They'd rather go hungry than eat something they don't want/like.

iota · 07/02/2005 14:46

hear hear Freckle

Blossomhill · 07/02/2005 14:46

Yes I do. Kids have school dinners and then I do them something about 5ish. Then dh and I eat at about 6.30-7.

MunchedTooManyMarsLady · 07/02/2005 14:47

No, can't be ar*ed to cook separate meals. I only do that if we've invited friends to supper. Then we indulge ourselves and the kids who are more than happy with DIY pizza

Blossomhill · 07/02/2005 14:48

Moondog I have to agree with Freckle. I would rather die than force my child to eat something they obviously do not like or want.

Titania · 07/02/2005 14:48

DH sometimes doesnt get in til nearly 7-8pm so we don't have tea til then. I have to cook for the kids for their tea about 4.30. They usually have the same as us unless its something that will ruin by me trying to keep it warm for us later.

moondog · 07/02/2005 14:52

Freckle and blossomhill.
I have NEVER forced a child to eat anything against their will. The point I'm making is that they have what we're having or nothing at all.
They won't starve.
My dd has spent a week eating next to nothing (admittedly she is unwell) and I have never forced anything on her.
IMO persuading children to eat when they don't want to sets a dangerous precedent for future appetite and weight management.

milge · 07/02/2005 14:55

The kids have one meal the same as us(generally supper) and whatever's to hand for lunch. they have fishfingers etc at lunch, unless dh and I want them for tea too.

iota · 07/02/2005 15:01

moondog - I have one child who is always keen to try stuff and loves his food, and another who is a very poor eater - has skinny ribs - and will happily not eat if the food is not to his taste.

If I want him to eat a balanced diet I have to feed him things that he will eat e.g he likes broccoli, beans, carrots and cauliflower, but will not eat any other sort of vegetable. So I always give him one of those 4 vegs. It frustrates me that he won't eat more variety, but at the end of the day he does eat stuff from all the food groups and is an active healthy child.

suedonim · 07/02/2005 15:06

We all eat the same thing, except maybe when dd has a friend over and they have something they want which we don't. I don't like cooking that much so making more than one thing is a nightmare to me. Even when ds2 was on an exclusion diet we ate the same as him, restricted as it was!!!

moondog · 07/02/2005 15:09

But Iota, I personally am not bothered if my child misses a meal or two. I am a great believer in them sensing/knowing what is best for them IF they are surrounded by good role models. Dh and I love good food and spend a lot of time and energy on shopping and cooking. There isn't any junk in our house and I probably eat more fruit and vegetables than the average chimp!
Not trying to be holier than thou, merely stating a fact (I am a very bad role model in lots of other ways!)
There are no biscuits,crisps,chocolates and so on around because we don't like them.

I do accept that children whose parents are fussy eaters may have issues and need encouraging. Generally speaking,I notice that the people I'm friendly with who are fussy eaters have children who are the same.