Louise Thompson and surrogacy

[somethinginbetweenlove]

Louise Thompson had, by all accounts, a very traumatic experience during childbirth where she nearly died.

She has now decided to use surrogacy for a second baby. She is using a private IVF clinic in London and posting a lot about how hard she is finding the egg retrieval process.

I really don’t understand how she can, in good faith, do this. She is all too aware of the risks that a healthy woman can face. Yet she is choosing to buy another woman’s body, and expose her to potentially life long health consequences. I’m disgusted

I think people largely make choices based on what's best for themselves and are quite willing to risk a stranger if it gets them a baby.
Human nature is inherently selfish.

I agree with you. I may be wrong but from my understanding from a few interviews I’ve seen, she had a couple of pre-existing health conditions pre-pregnancy but nothing that would have made anyone think she was at a higher risk of dying. So she really should be brutally aware that you can’t just screen for that, and find someone you know will be perfectly fine during pregnancy and childbirth.

And people will excuse their use of a surrogate by claiming that a woman has chosen this, aren't forced, are financially compensated. But we all know that choices aren't made in a vacuum and are rarely entirely 'free' choices. You don't see rich women queueing up to do this.

I only recently discovered the truth about disadvantaged women being forced into suregoccy in the same way women are forced into prostitution. It's all just so totally repugnant.
The rich can but women's bodies. Whether it's men buying women for sex. Or women buying other women's bodies to take on childbirth for them
We live in a sick world where money is the only thing that counts.

By all accounts, going by what her and her partner post on Instagram they’re not overly invested in the child they have, and have often posted things that are downright dangerous- the boy without a cycle helmet, poorly strapped into a car seat with a big coat on, perched precariously on top of kitchen units, walking stupidly close to the edge of the road while they film him. Not to mention all the bath pics and times when he’s been half dressed. All a different issue to surrogacy yes but I have no idea why they want to become parents again instead of working to be better parents to the child they’re lucky to have.

Probably because Louise is a spoilt little girl who has never been told no or she can’t have something ever in her life.

I think she has been through hell and I agree that it's surprising that she is willing to risk another woman's health. However, her husband comes across as very controlling and I wouldn't be surprised if he is the one insisting on this.

Oh, please. She’s not innocent. She is actively participating in a disgusting thing.

I honestly think Louise has got some serious mental health issues going on, and that it's appalling her partner and family are constantly enabling her behaviour. She has a beautiful healthy son and yet her life online is a constant litany of woe and melodrama. I wouldn't be surprised if she has Munchausen syndrome.

It wouldn’t surprise me. Her birth experience sounds awful but not exactly out of the ordinary. Every little thing that happens to her is a medical emergency, but they let little Leo get so unwell with tonsillitis that he ended up in hospital!

I’m not sure that’s reasonable. I’ve been critical of her using a surrogate upthread but a child requiring hospital treatment is not a sign that the parents “let them” get ill.
And I think a haemorrhage at home after the birth resulting in litres of blood loss, after a first major haemorrhage at the hospital, is out of the ordinary.

They didn’t take him to the doctor! They just watched until it got too bad. But Louise is in and out of hospital every few weeks it seems. She strikes me as a very selfish person and this is no different

I think this is unfair. Kids can go downhill fast and some children are affected more by certain illnesses than others. You only have to look at some kids that develop croup that are perfectly fine being looked after at home to others needing to be rushed into hospital as they are unable to breathe.

I saw her TikToks and was quite sickened she’s going down this route.

I completely disagree with stranger surrogates.

I also worry for this woman in particular- not that I know her, that the birth of her baby, being in hospital, the smells/the sounds/all of that, could still be traumatic for her (and for the birth mother) and bonding might not come easily - I guess that’s the case for any woman who experiences post traumatic stress after birth or post natal depression- but surrogacy isn’t a quick fix for mental health problems and I imagine it’s not easy for her husband to say no to, but perhaps he should have.

I agree with you. It is deeply depressing to see surrogacy - the sale of babies - normalised. I will never ever see it as something to be accepted. We wouldn’t separate a new kitten from its mother. Why is it ok to tear a newborn baby away?

Birth trauma is real and awful, but it doesn’t mean she’s allowed to use another woman as an incubator and inflict trauma on a newborn baby.

I guess another woman risking birth trauma on your behalf is fine if you pay them enough….

I’ve unfollowed her. She’s absolutely awful and her young son has no privacy.

All surrogacy is cruel and should be banned. The issues we will see in these poor children down the line will be sad and so tricky to overcome, though at least many are being born to the rich so that therapy won’t be an issue for them to afford.

I don’t understand how she could do this knowing how having a child has impacted her own health. She and her partner are disgusting.

Surrogacy should be banned.

This whole thread is extremely judgmental and out of order. But implying that she allowed her child to get very ill because she is a neglectful parent is too far. Nasty nasty people in this thread. It’s sickening.

I listened to a phone in about surrogacy on the radio yesterday and there was a call from a perinatal psychiatrist who said she has noticed a huge increase in this situation - women who had horrendous birth experiences first time round who are choosing surrogacy for their second child. And all I could think of was how they understood the physical and emotional impact of pregnancy and childbirth and were happy to pay another woman to go through it on their behalf! Pretty shocking stuff

Well, if you follow the Instagram of both parents (I don’t follow but it’s there for all to see whether you do or not) you’ll see it’s not such a leap to say they delayed getting treatment for their poorly child, because they are extremely uninvested in their son in many other ways. And bear in mind that’s what we all see, because they share it. I’m there’s plenty of concerning things that we don’t see.

I apologise to the above poster, as it was a mistake to quote them and not this one.

DH had an acquaintance like that. When we saw her the first time after she had her baby on the way there DH said it will either be the best birth ever or the worst. Sure enough we arrived to hear a booming voice “addenbrokes said it was the worst birth they had ever seen”

It's none of my business what two consenting adults choose to do