Hi all, I just feel so desperate this evening. I’ve had a lot of life events recently - work troubles, marriage struggles, family illness. Against a background of depression and anxiety for years - bipolar diagnosis which I don’t believe, (on lithium and a cocktail of medicines which I’ve mostly come off successfully), hospitalisation. Anyway everything that could possibly flare up has flared up. I have always had suicidal ideation but my two kids and husband have prevented me from going ahead. Problem now is I’m not sure that that deterrent is strong enough anymore. I’m scared