To not want them to come

[nyemisery]

We have visitors arriving today.

I don't want them to come because it means I have to stay alive.

Oh OP, you're cold and hungry because of this shitshow of a government.

I'm so angry that they are affecting people like you in this way.

This is awful, but it will not be forever. It can't, things must get better, as a country, soon. But for you, right now, things need to get better.

What would make things better for you, right now? Something to eat? Heating? Company? There are ways to get these things. Tell us what would help x

My lovely, I understand that you just want all the shit to stop, just want peace. This isn't the way, there's help out there. You've taken the first, really brave step of telling us in here.

I'm safe from harm
I'm just cold and hungry
I'll be ok just a silly pity party

Wish we could all send hugs op. You matter.

I don't want to be so lonely
I want to be able to put the heating in when it's just me in the house
I want to be able to eat the food in the fridge without feeling like I'm stealing from my children

A pity party isn’t silly.

NY really highlights misery, loneliness, hunger and cold.

It’s OK to talk about how you are feeling and the practical problems you have.

Do you have any food in the house OP? In our area the Olio app is busy at the moment with people wanting good homes for over-bought Christmas food rather than chucking it out. People offering food on Olio are often delighted to see it picked up. Lots of people, well off and struggling, say ‘oh yes please’ as an anti waste thing .

I know it must be frustrating to have us all suggest possible solutions when a ‘pity party’ is valid on its own terms, but your mental health and resilience to cold will be stronger with something inside you.

Anyway, ongoing strength to you.

I do get the grinding misery of ‘getting by’. Another day without the heating on etc. it is wearing and demoralising.

Managing so that your kids have warmth and food is a real achievement. You are doing well.

Thank you.

Sorry you're going through this. There is a way forward and brighter times ahead. Can you say which area you live? People on here would love to help.

I can't do this. I have to and I'm safe but I just can't do it. I don't know how I can keep going but I will.

You can do this lovely, because you're here and you're talking. You have children who need you and love you and that's why you're still here doing this.
Better days are coming.

I'm awake if you want to chat for a while? X

I'm sorry
I wasted all your time
I'm not posting any more

Hi OP. You’ve not wasted anyone’s time. People wouldn’t reply If they don’t want to…so although we don’t know you, we do care.
Try to keep talking, it really does help x

Hey, you didn't waste my time, sleep eluded me completely last night, uou were someone for me to talk to while insomnia did its thing.
How are you feeling now?