Not to alarm anyone, I'm not going to do it now.
I'm having a very hard time physically and mentally, have problems eating, sleeping, crying a lot etc.
Been to GP- offered meds but I'm still trying to get used to medication side effects from illness.
I've just got myself in a big hole crying every day, thoughts on a loop, I. An see how this has gradually escalated from despair to very low mood to going completely into a shell feeling that actually nobody can help me and whatever I do, I can't help myself.
I'm fully in control atm and although I think about Suicide a few times a day, I can always manage to process these thoughts and push through.
I just wondered if anyone else had a plan of how they would end it, not intending to do it, just to make them feel safe. It's like the feeling that you are in control. It's a logical thought not a drama, something that makes me feel safe. Or is this escalating more and do I need help 