Page 11 | Disturbing finds in house clearance

Lockedboxed · 2024-12-04T22:44:06+00:00

Clearing a hoarder’s house is not fun at all but the most disturbing find was locked boxes of all manner of books and sex toys. You really would never have thought it. Never felt unsafe with the owner (until their diagnosis of dementia, but meds keep them calm now). I can’t unsee it (and I’m trying to be open minded about consenting adults). I think it might help if anyone has solidarity from their own upsetting finds, to make me feel less alone. Please tell me this isn’t the only time this has happened. (Regular poster but name changed for this as combined my posts would be outing).

ScottBakula · 05/12/2024 10:54

HarrietSchulenberg · 04/12/2024 23:38

My dad went into his parents' loft to clear things out after they'd died. He climbed the ladder, lifted the loft hatch, shone a torch inside and nearly passed out when he saw a face staring back at him, glassy eyed and mouth agape. It was a blown up sex doll that my adult cousin, who had lived there recently, had stashed away to "enjoy" while his grandparents were out.
She was not alone up there, in fact ahe had quite a few companions in various states of deflation.
This cued much debate about whether to hand the little vinyl harem back to my cousin and, if so, whether to fully deflate them and hand him a box, or to pump them all up, put some frocks on them and send them round to his new house in a taxi. I thought the application of some hot chilli paste into their orifices beforehand would spice things up a bit more for him.
In the end Dad and his brother decided that this little ready made party would be too thrilling so they popped 'em and put 'em in the bin.
I still think it was a wasted opportunity.

His name wasn't Del Trotter was it 😂.
The bit at the start of this clip with the video recorder is so true too , all of us of a certain age will of gone through this ! https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=only+fools+and+horses+blow+up+dolls&sca_esv=09d50bc19946cdf1&sxsrf=ADLYWIICHtsYxl-baazWTCY1Omk_b_kxTA%3A1733395542158&source=hp&ei=VoRRZ6GPBvOtkdUPhP-TgAE&oq=only+fools+and+horeses+blow&gs_lp=EhFtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1ocCIbb25seSBmb29scyBhbmQgaG9yZXNlcyBibG93KgIIADIHEAAYgAQYDTIHEAAYgAQYDTIHEAAYgAQYDTIHEAAYgAQYDTIHEAAYgAQYDTIHEAAYgAQYDTIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB5I9NkBUNsSWNmJAXABeACQAQCYAaUCoAGuGKoBBzEzLjEyLjK4AQHIAQD4AQGYAhygAuIfqAIPwgIHECMYJxjqAsICChAjGIAEGCcYigXCAgsQLhiABBixAxiDAcICCBAAGIAEGLEDwgIFEC4YgATCAg4QLhiABBixAxjRAxjHAcICCxAAGIAEGLEDGIMBwgIREC4YgAQYsQMY0QMYgwEYxwHCAgsQLhiABBjHARivAcICFBAuGIAEGLEDGNEDGIMBGMcBGIoFwgIIEC4YgAQYsQPCAgUQABiABMICDhAuGIAEGLEDGIMBGNQCwgILEC4YgAQY0QMYxwHCAgoQLhiABBixAxgKwgIHEAAYgAQYCsICChAAGIAEGLEDGArCAgcQLhiABBgKwgIKEAAYgAQYsQMYDcICDRAAGIAEGLEDGIMBGA2YA1HxBZ7yu3pS3o08kgcIMS4yNS4xLjGgB4LuAQ&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-hp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:8811ff0a,vid:0fxzMP-3YD4,st:0

only fools and horses blow up dolls - Google Search

https://www.google.co.uk/search?ei=VoRRZ6GPBvOtkdUPhP-TgAE&gs_lp=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&oq=only+fools+and+horeses+blow&q=only+fools+and+horses+blow+up+dolls&sca_esv=09d50bc19946cdf1&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-hp&source=hp&sxsrf=ADLYWIICHtsYxl-baazWTCY1Omk_b_kxTA%3A1733395542158#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:8811ff0a,vid:0fxzMP-3YD4,st:0

Alondra · 05/12/2024 10:55

The post made my day. The DH had his own sexual fetishes but he wanted his wife face glued in place to the women in bondage magazines. This is loyalty LOL.

Doglady1764 · 05/12/2024 11:02

My brother in law found a really racist table which was a bit like a gollywog holding a tray. We did not know what to do with it. We wondered about sending it to a museum about slavery.

WoolySnail · 05/12/2024 11:14

Zinglenibber · 05/12/2024 01:18

My initial reaction to that was "Awwwww ❤️"

But now I'm questioning my sanity...

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Maybe it was his kink but he didn't feel he could ask her out of respect or she refused?etc.
I think it's sweet but I know I'm insane 🤪😂

Gloriia · 05/12/2024 11:21

Doglady1764 · 05/12/2024 11:02

My brother in law found a really racist table which was a bit like a gollywog holding a tray. We did not know what to do with it. We wondered about sending it to a museum about slavery.

I'd have just destroyed it and chucked it out. What did you do with it?

Zinglenibber · 05/12/2024 11:26

WoolySnail · 05/12/2024 11:14

Maybe it was his kink but he didn't feel he could ask her out of respect or she refused?etc.
I think it's sweet but I know I'm insane 🤪😂

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Excellent, that makes two of us!

Dweetfidilove · 05/12/2024 11:49

HarrietSchulenberg · 04/12/2024 23:38

My dad went into his parents' loft to clear things out after they'd died. He climbed the ladder, lifted the loft hatch, shone a torch inside and nearly passed out when he saw a face staring back at him, glassy eyed and mouth agape. It was a blown up sex doll that my adult cousin, who had lived there recently, had stashed away to "enjoy" while his grandparents were out.
She was not alone up there, in fact ahe had quite a few companions in various states of deflation.
This cued much debate about whether to hand the little vinyl harem back to my cousin and, if so, whether to fully deflate them and hand him a box, or to pump them all up, put some frocks on them and send them round to his new house in a taxi. I thought the application of some hot chilli paste into their orifices beforehand would spice things up a bit more for him.
In the end Dad and his brother decided that this little ready made party would be too thrilling so they popped 'em and put 'em in the bin.
I still think it was a wasted opportunity.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
I thought it was going to be something else, completely. No more crime channels for me.

blackwithlight · 05/12/2024 11:51

All this thread has done is make me hope that when I die I get a diagnosis of a terminal illness first so I get a chance to clear out the stuff I don't want my kids to find!

Slooodie359 · 05/12/2024 11:52

Kbroughton · 05/12/2024 10:37

This thread has made me think at what stage do I need to get rid of my vibrators so as not to traumatise the kids! I don't want there to be a gap between being able to use them and actual dementia but then I may forget. Oh no, one more worry!!

Never know when it’s your time …

YellowAsteroid · 05/12/2024 12:01

I guess you have to accept that everyone - even an elderly member of your family - has a sexuality.

IMHO, it’s disturbing to think of anyone’s sexuality and sexual desire (except for one’s partner) so just don’t dwell on it.

We none of us want to think about anyone we meet in the normal course of life having sex. I think it’s a natural instinct not to, otherwise civilisation might collapse!

TheGander · 05/12/2024 12:01

Doglady1764 · 05/12/2024 11:02

My brother in law found a really racist table which was a bit like a gollywog holding a tray. We did not know what to do with it. We wondered about sending it to a museum about slavery.

Just finished reading a book on the Welsh dairies of London. These were commonly put in the shop windows , they were called Blackamoores.

YellowAsteroid · 05/12/2024 12:05

Lockedboxed · 04/12/2024 23:14

Clear… no items were kept or cleaned but a collection company I used try to recycle all the waste. Plus you shouldn’t put electrical waste or paint in a household rubbish bin. Maybe I’m overly responsible as well as a prude.

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I don’t think you’re a prude @Lockedboxed

No-one wants to be confronted with anyone else’s sexual desires (unless you fancy them!)

These feelings of disgust or unease are instinctive and to do with the incest taboo - old old patterns of the survival of the species. Do t beat yourself up - your feelings are actually probably quite healthy and natural.

AllisonMurphy49 · 05/12/2024 12:08

TomatoSandwiches · 04/12/2024 23:06

Why did you need to clean them?! Just chuck them in the bin.

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She said clear not clean.
I don't think they were heading to ebay for resale. 😂

Superworm24 · 05/12/2024 12:09

At what age should we clear out this stuff? I've never thought about it before but I wouldn't want any of our family to know about some of the stuff we get up to!

TheGander · 05/12/2024 12:10

I agree @YellowAsteroid I think it’s a question of degrees. It’s one thing finding your late mothers vibrator, it’s another finding a male relative’s bondage gear, butt plugs etc especially if it was your father, which would make you question his sexuality ( it would me). I had the very unenviable task of clearing my hoarder brothers home while he was sectioned, I was knee deep in rubble, books, photos, history magazines ( if he had one book about the Algerian war he had 200) electrical cords and other random shit, then I found his porn stash, that was a low point, I refrained from taking it to the tip as I had to accept he had the right to use porn.

Superworm24 · 05/12/2024 12:13

I also don't think you're a prude OP. We tend to infantilise older people.

Gloriia · 05/12/2024 12:26

TheGander · 05/12/2024 12:10

I agree @YellowAsteroid I think it’s a question of degrees. It’s one thing finding your late mothers vibrator, it’s another finding a male relative’s bondage gear, butt plugs etc especially if it was your father, which would make you question his sexuality ( it would me). I had the very unenviable task of clearing my hoarder brothers home while he was sectioned, I was knee deep in rubble, books, photos, history magazines ( if he had one book about the Algerian war he had 200) electrical cords and other random shit, then I found his porn stash, that was a low point, I refrained from taking it to the tip as I had to accept he had the right to use porn.

Edited

Why were you clearing his personal things just because he was sectioned? I understand that if he was a hoarder you wanted to assist but this should have been with his consent and him being present. If not then I'd always stick to kitchen and general living areas not bedrooms. Of course he has the right to use adult material.

TheGander · 05/12/2024 12:32

Because he was in no fit state to do it himself, didn’t want to and couldn’t return to the home in its current state, as dictated by his mental health team.

Cyclebabble · 05/12/2024 12:50

My eldest son helped me clear my dad's house when he died. My DS was 19 at the time. In the kitchen there was a pine dresser with best plates in. On top of this dresser we found, slowly but surely fourteen opened packets of viagra. My dad had a new GF after my mum died, but both were in there 80s. DS found this to be hilarious. It gave him a more positive view of his grandad who he now describes as a legend.

MaloryJones · 05/12/2024 12:55

TheBiggestMuffInCheshire · 04/12/2024 23:27

I dare you to take Swank to the antiques roadshow 😅

😆😆

Near us we have a second hand store who buys mainly electricals now.

Recentish , however, he had a large haul of books brought in and he did buy those. Lots of autobiographies and movie books .. and a whole load of Vintage Playboy magazines. Now on Sale.

colesr · 05/12/2024 13:03

I can't see the connection between sex toys and OP 'never feeling unsafe' with the owner.

Gloriia · 05/12/2024 13:40

TheGander · 05/12/2024 12:32

Because he was in no fit state to do it himself, didn’t want to and couldn’t return to the home in its current state, as dictated by his mental health team.

Yes I understand assistance may have been required but I'd have stuck to the general living areas and respected his privacy a bit. It is good that you didn't take any adult content to the tip but it shouldn't have even been a consideration.
People are allowed to do whatever they like regarding their sexuality as long as legal obviously. Why was finding this private stuff a low point?

Gloriia · 05/12/2024 13:40

colesr · 05/12/2024 13:03

I can't see the connection between sex toys and OP 'never feeling unsafe' with the owner.

No its all weirdly judgemental isn't it.

WoolySnail · 05/12/2024 13:52

AConstipatedAccountantJustCantBudget · 05/12/2024 10:28

I once saw an episode of Dickinson's Real Deal where somebody brought in some jazz mags that had belonged to their father.

They were vintage and relatively tame compared to some of the material out there nowadays, but even so, the DRD camera still shot the goods from very 'careful' angles and none of the usual close-ups like they do when it's jewellery or teddy bears.

The dealer declined to buy them - whether it was because he just didn't want to deal in such a thing or maybe didn't want people seeing him on national TV showing interest and 'acquiring' them?!

They went to auction and made quite a decent amount. For all we know, though, they could have been bought privately at the auction by the dealer in disguise and using a fake name

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According to my bil ( not sure how he knows 🤣) vintage pornography is very popular still and worth quite a bit of money!!

margegunderson · 05/12/2024 14:11

colesr · 05/12/2024 13:03

I can't see the connection between sex toys and OP 'never feeling unsafe' with the owner.

The usual MN pearl clutching that oldies might lead or have led a normal life I'd guess.