Son, GCSEs, nervous breakdown incoming

[DungareesTrombonesDinos]

My 16 year old has struggled throughout his education journey so far and this resulted in him getting a grade 2 English Language GCSE and a U in Maths on Thursday. We are still really proud of him as at one point we thought he wouldn't actually sit any GCSEs. Hes been at a PRU and they were amazing for building relationships with him but not so good at the education side. Hes come away with an encyclopedia of AQA units like making fish fingers sandwiches (no im not lying) but Colleges wont accept 200 certificates.

He has an EHCP (dyslexia, dyspraxia, ADHD, Irlen and I suspect dysalculia) and we originally put down for a multi skills trade course so he could have a taster as he he 0 idea of what he wants to do. College put him in for a level 2 bricklaying course and he hasn't got the grades - he needs 2 grade 2s.

College have essentially said its tough luck and he can do art (no interest), sport (no interest) or some random sounding course with no qualifications. They've said they wont just let uim retake GCSEs, hes got to be on a course. Ive put him down for the waitlist for multi skills - might be December or never.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and come through it with a plan??? I honestly thought we were done trying to work out a plan for him and I am so stressed Im not sleeping. He appears to not give a shiny fuck but I know his self esteem will be even more ruined when his mates start College in September and he doesnt....

Sorry for the essay and thank you for any words of wisdom.

Sorry I can’t really understand what’s going on…. So he has comprehensively failed the two GCSEs he took, and “doesn’t give a shiny shit”…. So re sitting will very likely be an abject waste of time

Most colleges will offer functional skills maths to people who got a 2 1 or U at maths. Same for English.

yes, those courses are add ons rather than full courses. At this level of achievement many colleges offer skills for life sort of courses which look at employability skills, writing cvs, possibly working in a college shop/restaurant/etc

a grade profile like this is usually students who have significant additional needs and therefore the focus is on developing life skills to support independent living and increase employability.

if the college he’s currently looking at does not have courses he is interested in are there other options locally? Special needs sixth form might be another option.

A friend was worried her son wouldn't pass any gcse's last year. she spoke to the local college and they had a,range of practical courses in all sectors that didn't need any GCSE passes for a level one (they studied either GCSE maths and/or English or a lower level basic maths or English course alongside the btec), with level two or three being available to those with passes. As it happened he scraped through and went down the,apprenticeship route but even then the employer was looking for keen, personable apprentices above everything and some of them had no gcses and were taken on anyway, with the chance to sit them as part of their apprentice studies.
Are there any other colleges accessible to your son which might offer the basic level courses in a subject he's interested in? He'll be much less engaged if he's forced to do something because it's all there is.
Is there a local authority, highways or utility company near you looking for apprentices? (I suggest these as they often recruit for a wide range of jobs so he might find something interesting). He might be far more,engaged if he's earning and not stuck in school. A lot of kids turn it around away from the classroom.
Also, he has 3 years of further education free funding. If he does a basic course at college, just to get the chance of passing his gcses and maybe pass his,driving test this,coming year, he will still have two years to do a course he really wants to.

This is not a candidate for resits. Would be a complete waste of time and money. And the college knows that.

Is he on adhd meds?
if he doesnt care at all he wont pass.
would he do hairdressing or similar?

or get a job and later try to retake.

Thanks for your supportive message, really appreciated.

I disagree wholeheartedly. He is really bright but his journey through school convinced him that he isnt. With support in English lessons he was answering really well, even to grade 5 or 6 standards at times. His dyslexia assessment put him in the top 5% for vocabulary in children his age. Its just that he struggles with exams.

You branding him a complete waste and money is part of the fucking problem.

He passed functional skills maths and English without any problems. Unfortunately other local Colleges want the same grades for even entry level courses and they are booked up. Thank you for suggesting it though.

Good grief op

Reread your own op

Are there any other colleges? Near me there is an offer for children who have an ehcp. Its a foundation level course (level 1) and multi trades is one of the options and you do functional skills alongside it. There's no gcse, then they can do level 2 after

Is it the level 2 that's causing the issue for you.

Im sure he does care but at the moment theres a bit of bravado.

Can you get the EHCP people into action?
The multi skills course sounds good, I'd see if they can bring pressure. Why on earth did the college have him finished for a level 2 not a level 1?

You described your son as “not giving a shiny fuck”.

You

Oh this is a great point thank you, I will have a look into it. Yeah its the level 2 because they want 2 grade 2s. He is full to the very brim of bravado so thats a good point too!

Ive emailed them so hoping they can do something. I told our LA that he wanted to do the multiskills originally, but they put him on a higher level joinery course - not a clue why and I queried it with the College at interview but they said we could talk to them when he got his results. Well we did and multiskills is full grrrrrrrrrr

Its so stressful. My son wanted to do carpentry at one college. The LA put him down for childcare. I dont know if its because it began with c? Anyway it got sorted but these sorts of things cause such stress because places get filled.

Im sure you will find something but I cant believe anyone gets through an ehcp process and the LA without feeling like a breakdown is due at one point or another.

Maybe he needs to put academics to the side and get into the work place? Can he get a job at Asda or something?

Thank you for understanding I hope your son was OK in the end? Oh the EHCP process was another lot of fun and games, luckily my local SENDIASS person was the most amazing woman.

It may be worth speaking to your LA about the “local offer” ie what is available locally for young people with special needs. There absolutely should be somewhere doing level 1 courses.

Term hasn't started and pupils drop out. Go to the colleges that have the courses you're interested in, both you and your son, ask to be considered if a gap occurs, show your interest and speak to admissions in person. It can make a difference and he has additional time for his FE, so plan accordingly.

What level functional skills did he do? My son is very dyslexic so I taught him at home and he did functional skills level 2 online which is equivalent to GCSE. It was full on but worth it.

As stated above, a Level 2 Functional Skills pass is the equivalent to a GCSE grade 4 pass - so if your son has passed already or can pass the Level 2 FS in both maths and English, he won’t need to re-take the GCSEs.

There seem to be a lot of misconceptions about Functional Skills and the Level 2 qualification being the equivalent of a GCSE grade 4 pass, including someone on a previous MN thread who refused to believe that they are equivalents, whilst claiming to have taught both….

I hope things work out for your son OP.

Your local council should have a team who works with young people who are NEET or risk of NEET which he is without a college place. It’s highly likely most lower level courses will be full at this time of year but there can be a lot of movement in the next couple of weeks. Kids don’t turn up to college or leave or change courses etc…

there should also be other options in smaller provision… something like ixion that offer supported internships etc

look at your local council website and get in touch

https://www.ixionholdings.com/jump-into-work/

https://www.ixionholdings.com/supported-internships/

Another voice to say that until students are physically there, it's a lot of guess work in the numbers so keep trying.

I despair at how difficult it is for kids like this. It's where we lose people who could be outstanding bricklayers but instead they'll get lost in 'computer says no'.

Keep going with the trades even if he has to do a longer route to get there.

You sound like a lovely mum and the stress now to push him will be worth it. Even if he doesn't appreciate it right now!

See if any alternative provisions offer multiskills as well. I have DC struggling in mainstream and we're looking at AP to do the same course as it has smaller classes.