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What;s the worst song you have ever heard?

368 replies

UnquietDad · 31/07/2007 17:59

For several years, for me, it was Puffy P Diddy Daddy's drive-by murder of "Every Breath You Take", inexplicably re-titled "I'll Be Missing You", and even more inexplicably Number One for 6 weeks in 1997.

But now it's something I had the misfortune to hear the other day, a collaboration between someone called Nelly and someone called Tim McGraw.

The former presumably has enough bling and "attitude" and stupid sportswear for him not to mind people pointing at him and saying "you've got a girl's name". The latter is one of those people you only find in the American charts, clad in shades and a black cowboy hat and sporting a camp goatee. Yes, it's the world's first rap-country crossover, and it is every bit as bad as that sounds.

It meanders along for four minutes (although it seems much, much longer) with no vestige of a tune and one or both of Nelly and Tim growling "it's allll in mah heeeee-d".

The video gives away the fact that the two of them haven't even met and probably recorded the thing in two separate studios thousand of miles apart, thus betraying the "song"'s origins as a marketing-man's dream. Presumably it's aiming at snaring a predominantly-southern-state white redneck audience and an urban black audience at the same time. I note also from the video that "Nelly" also wears a plaster on his head (heeeee-d), presumably because he really isn't a wack def jam muthafeckin brutha from da streetz at all, but a bit of a wuss who got scratched by someone else in the playground.

It's such an unmitigated load of shite. And it'll probably lead to more amalgamations of the two genres: "Mah Baby Dang Done Left Me (So My Homeez Gonna Fill Da Bitch Wit Lead)" perhaps? Or "I Ain't Gonna Hang Wit Ya Posse No More (Cos You Said Mah Cousin's Dawg Was Ugly)"?

OP posts:
CatIsSleepy · 31/07/2007 23:12

haha desi
'you are the wind beneath my wings'

hahahah

madamez · 31/07/2007 23:12

Puppydavies:well you've got a choice of two - there was a song by that name from Thin Lizzy which was OK and then there was one by Toplaoder as featured in Jamie Twat Oliver's sainsbury's adverts that made you want to hoof the telly in!

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 23:13

Lay off Cher, Norky

I'd sleep with you over your Paul McCartney opinion, however.

Carmenere · 31/07/2007 23:13

Mners, this is up there with the biggest crimes ever committed against music, this is what you will be listening to in hell

This will have special significance to the Irish mners or to Eurovision fans with a long memory..............

madamez · 31/07/2007 23:14

Actually a lot of these real barf-inducers are Funeral Classics for some reason and ooooh OMFG I've just remembered something even worse - Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden oh sh!t I want to go and stick pins in my ears now

skyatnight · 31/07/2007 23:14

Toploader - definitely rubbish.

'you saw the whole of the moon' or something (?) by The Waterboys - chugs on leadenly forever. (Like some of their other stuff).

puppydavies · 31/07/2007 23:14

top fuckin loader thems the bastards

CatIsSleepy · 31/07/2007 23:15

carmenere that's hilarious! is it for real or some kind of piss-take?

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 23:15

Oh, Cat. The Final Countdown! I was trying to recall that nauseous piece of prose. That's got to be in my top ten.

CatIsSleepy · 31/07/2007 23:16

[kicking toploader in emoticon]

TheDuchessOfNorksBride · 31/07/2007 23:17

Des, sorry, but I'm not bedding down with anyone that listens to Cher.

Tom Jones doing the Prince song. Please God, strike him dumb.

Carmenere · 31/07/2007 23:17

No Cat it is for real

gogetter · 31/07/2007 23:20

LucyEllen - I think it is a very popular beer song, a kareoke classic by all standards.
I think the lyrics shld be changed from dan da da dan to 'get it up ya'

Go on sing it out loud - fits a treat.

MotherFunk · 31/07/2007 23:20

Message withdrawn

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 23:20

Ah, now Norky. We'll seriously bed down on that. Cher is an aberration, but when Tom Jones sings KISS, I literally want to vomit.

But it's nowhere near as bad as SEX BOMB. In fact, there it is. My No.1 crap song.

'Baby you can turn me on.'

Followed by a Huugh noise.

Barf.

Aero · 31/07/2007 23:20

'Firestarter' by Prodigy I think - biggest load of crapola I've ever heard. There's a good mixture of songs I love and hate on this list. The Ace of Base on was huge when I was on my honeymoon, so I have a certain liking for it.

Pretty much all novelty songs I hate too.

wotsits · 31/07/2007 23:21

No mention of Westlife yet. What's that rubbish, something about flying without wings... urgh!

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 23:21

Yes, the Whole of the Moon is one of the best songs every written.

You must be quite mad!

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 23:22

... or even ever written.

lucyellensmum · 31/07/2007 23:24

gogetter - PMSL!!!!!!!!!!! i have myself on CD at a departmental xmas party providing the da da da da bits - if only i had your imagination, no really, ROTFPMSL, oh, bugger the pelvic floor

MotherFunk · 31/07/2007 23:24

Message withdrawn

Aero · 31/07/2007 23:24

Oh my god Carmenere! Eek!! That is truly awful. Couldn't say the years have been kind to old Johnny either!

skyatnight · 31/07/2007 23:24

Motherfunk - when I said: '(like some of their other stuff)' - I meant I do like some of their other stuff. I liked, for example, the 'Raggle Taggle Gypsy' song that I heard on the radio from the Cambridge Folk Festival. They are a good band. I just don't like that particular song because it feels like someone is hitting you over the head for three hours with a marrow until you lose your hearing or the will to hear. Sorry .

lucyellensmum · 31/07/2007 23:24

but yes, the whole of the moon, it is phenomenonmenana , oh, ive drunken toooo much

CatIsSleepy · 31/07/2007 23:25

whole of the moon is very good

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