If you're both still working with no childcare

[helia]

If you're both still working with no childcare how much are you managing to get done a day?

DH and I are both still working full time although without childcare. DC is 3 years old.

My employer has told me to do what I can and top up my time sheet with a credit for any hours I don't work.

I'm able to do around 5 or 6 hours a day (I ought to be doing 7.5) and DH is able to do 6 or 6.5 (he's meant to do 8). We are both pretty tired now and it just feels relentless. I feel like I ought to be doing more but I'm really struggling with energy and time.

I was just wondering how this compares to what others in a similar position are doing. I don't know anyone else in work in the same boat and can't gauge if I should be pushing myself more to do more and to get more done, or if it would be acceptable (and not lazy) to ease off a bit. I feel stressed at times.

Our working day starts at 6 am and doesn't finish until over 12 hours later, albeit we work in fits and starts.

Thank you very much. to anyone in the same or similar position.

I think if you're employer is happy, take it easy and do what you must but be gentle with yourself. Dh is working 4 days a week, roughly 7 hour days, give or take depending on the day. But he's self-employed, so no work, no income, and his work involves heavy machinery and tools that aren't safe for children, so though he works alone in a workshop (so we're all self isolating), he can't take dc with him. I work 2 full days a week uninterrupted (so about 16 hours a week, when dh takes a day off mid week and then I work all of Saturday). I also do about 2-3 hours a day the other 4 weekdays. So I guess that is about 25-28 hours week of actual work. I have a 2 year old and a 7 year old (who also has school work to do, which is a massive pain). I normally work full time but my employer is not bothered with me working my usual hours. They are happy I am staying sane and well and I have a lot of support from them, which is wonderful.

What has really worked for us is each having dedicated time to work while the other is fully responsible for dc. So we don't bother try to work all day. We each have our days when we are meant to focus on work and other days when we trade off and are fully responsible for dc. We work fewer hours, but we aren't juggling a million pots. I've also set it up so that dh does about an hour of school work with older dc in the morning before he leaves for work. It means he loses an hour of work time each day, but it frees up a lot more time for me during the day if I'm not taking care of two kids, home schooling and working. If they can mostly just roam and play, I have a lot more flexibility to get work tasks done. It's trade off for me doing the bulk of the childcare during the week (I have a desk based job, which while requiring a lot of focus and time, I can at least safely do from home).

DH and I are both working full time from home. We just about manage to get the kids (age 8 and 10) to do around 90 minutes of school work a day. It takes a lot of attention to get them going though. The rest of the day is TV/garden/laptops/a walk around teatime.

It's really hard. I haven't struggled too much but the last week has felt tough. I could cry today tbh but I can't get five minutes alone to let it out.

I am a single parent, changed my hours to early morning and late at night, trying to fit in my 8 hours but looks more like 5-6. Exhausted though.

I am managing 6 hours on average for what should be 8 hour days. DH is about the same.

Employers are fine with it in principal but it seems the same level of output is still expected regardless of the shorter hours so it is quite a stressful time tbh.

I usually do part time 20h over 3 days and DH full time 37h over 5 days. Since lockdown I do my hours over 5 days 10-12 and 4-6. DH works 5.30-7, 8-10, 1-4 plus an hour or 2 most evenings or at the weekend. It's pretty tough. DC are 4 and 1. We're just grateful we don't have to do home schooling too.

DH does 7-12 then logs on from 5.30 til 7pm ish

I do 12-5 and am using holiday to make up the additional 2.5 hours.

DS is three. No way could we do this without splitting the day.

At 7pm, I tend to go for a walk. Sometimes 30 mins, sometimes 2 hours. That's really helping me decompress and stop from going mad after staring at the same four walls all day!

I am WFH FT and although I’m one of the bosses (so nobody checking on me), my work dictates that I maintain the same level of billing etc.

DH going out to work Mon-Fri 7-5 and the odd day at the weekend.

I also have one primary aged DD to try to get some education and some time with each day.

Some days are okay, some days I’m exhausted and want to cry (today is the latter)

Not exactly same but my OH is a key worker put full time and I work part time in a job I can’t do from home. Luckily I’m only doing two mornings a week and my partner goes on afternoons when I get home. God knows what i will do if job expects me do two full days again before school reopens 🤷‍♀️ Maybe OH will have to make sure his days off are on the days I work but that would be a miracle.

Out full time*

Both me and DH are WFH - him FT, me 3 days, still expected to do our contracted hours. My work is busier than normal. We also have a 1.5yr old toddler. It's a struggle because at that age she needs so much supervising and attention. On my workdays we both log on as soon as we get up to get extra work done and dont really take lunch. We also do extra whilst she naps. It's a nightmare because I feel like in firefighting work and childcare without giving my all to either. We have the tv on a lot to help with DD!

working with a child in primary school and one with complex learning needs (I.e. cannot work independently at all). I get the work done - i cannot afford to lose my job but the house is a tip, pretty much zero home schooling. They are basically in front of screens all day (when they are not fighting).

Schools are getting a bit shitty with me - apparently other parents (many on furlough - I know then outside of school) are managing decent chunks. Well, if I had all day and no work to do of course I could do home schooling. But I cannot (esp taking into consideration a child with very complex needs).

I think we all just do what we can do. For some work comes first, some others have more flexibility and can also do schooling. It helps probably massive if it is a 2 parent household where one parent is not working.

It’s a nightmare. DH “has” to be in constant calls 9-6 (I’m livid about this)
I’m also trying to do more than a full time “COVID critical” response with a 3 and 6 yo. I’m not doing anywhere need my full hours but need to be responsive 9-3 at the least. My boss is being very understanding but my kids are suffering, no homeschooling at all and neither settling until 10pm at night. DH has also had a 20% pay cut so I’m feeling quite resentful about the whole thing.

I am doing 6 hours, which is my normal hours, and DH is doing 7. We do it in seperate blocks though, so I work 6am until lunch uninterrupted, then swap. I think that is easier than constant switching.

DH and I both working from home with our four DC.
The youngest is 7, so much older than yours and have schoolwork to do.
I also work from home during school holidays, so they’re used to it and we have the eldest home from uni so he helps out.

It’s really tough and feels pretty relentless tbh.
I have unalterable deadlines and have been shoutier than I’d like recently.

Both DH and I are WFH full time, I work on Covid related data, DH manages a factory. We have 3 primary ages DC.
It's v v challenging!
We're both working in fits and starts as and when we can. Screens are educating our kids 😬 I'm currently hiding in the bedroom having some time out which I feel helps even if just 15 mins every few hours.
The guilt is huge..the alcohol consumption has increased!!

Thank you for everyone who has shared how you're managing. I feel better knowing we're not the only family dealing with this. It feels quite lonely at times! I've tried to identify others in work in a similar position but they've just said that their husband has been furloughed or that they only work 3 days pw so can manage by splitting their hours over 5 days.

We moved in with my parents at the start of lockdown so we could all help each other out. Otherwise we’d be on some sort of shift system which we couldn’t cope with as our 18 month old is still up so much in the night. As it is we are interrupted and working lots of evenings and weekend. Hugs OP - it’s shit and no one in government even seems to have mentioned it?!

@helia it’s nice to know you’re not the only one isn’t it. I’m the only one in my team in this position and we already had a big problem with presenteeism.

We split the day 6am - noon and noon - 6pm. We both then log on post bedtime and tie up any loose ends. Life isn't much fun but it is better this way than both of us trying to do 9-5 and constantly stopping and starting.

It’s just so grim isn’t it? Work FT. Workload has doubled. DH is a key worker, working 10 hours a day/ out of the house 10 hours a day. Children are 6 and 2. It’s absolutely horrendous. Zero home schooling. Both plonked in front of the tv all day. House is a tip and I am a mess!!

I'm managing between 4-6 hours and my employer (Govt) is ignoring the deficit.

Unfortunately we've pretty much prioritized work and left the 2, 4 and 6 year olds to their own devices. We both need to be on calls at the same time so there's not much to stagger. They watch TV or play in the garden, or fight...

We've both definitely decided to put work on the back burner and prioritise the kids. They need the attention due to the lack of normal routine.

We're both working with a 5 year old, and a 2 year old. It's haaaaaard. I work 3 10 hour days usually and DH is full time.

My work is more pressured first thing in the morning so get up at 6.30 and start and work until 11.30 when I take the kids out for a walk. Then DH cracks on and when my littlest is napping, I stick the 5 year old on his tablet (school approved apps only 😉) or set him up with some toys and then work a few hours in the afternoon. We both do a bit in the evening too.

Homeschooling isn't really happening. The house is usually a mess. We're a bit fraught. But we coping. Just.

I'm on leave this week and it's made me realise how strsed and anxious I was feeling trying to juggle it all.

to all those also struggling through.

I have been working every day, 7 days a week, since mid March.
I start at 8. Finish at 4. Sometimes I work till 11.30pm.
I am utterly shattered. I keep shouting at teenage ds's. It's not good.

I have to keep going, doing extra hours, because the quality of the work I'm producing is so much lower than normal.