If you're both still working with no childcare

[helia]

If you're both still working with no childcare how much are you managing to get done a day?

DH and I are both still working full time although without childcare. DC is 3 years old.

My employer has told me to do what I can and top up my time sheet with a credit for any hours I don't work.

I'm able to do around 5 or 6 hours a day (I ought to be doing 7.5) and DH is able to do 6 or 6.5 (he's meant to do 8). We are both pretty tired now and it just feels relentless. I feel like I ought to be doing more but I'm really struggling with energy and time.

I was just wondering how this compares to what others in a similar position are doing. I don't know anyone else in work in the same boat and can't gauge if I should be pushing myself more to do more and to get more done, or if it would be acceptable (and not lazy) to ease off a bit. I feel stressed at times.

Our working day starts at 6 am and doesn't finish until over 12 hours later, albeit we work in fits and starts.

Thank you very much. to anyone in the same or similar position.

I have cried twice in the last month.

When I read all the threads on comparing furloughed to non furloughed, I feel ashamed that I'm so jealous of the furloughed posters.

Same here, both key workers but not frontline (police and social care). Kids are 8 and 4. Same as most, I do mornings with the kids, swap at lunch and have our walk, then I work in afternoons. Managing some homeschooling for eldest but practicing benign neglect and trying not to worry that the 4 year old is now proficient with computer games....
They have a bath together two mornings a week which gives at least an hour of peace, and bubble mishaps been a Godsend!

I am similar, oblomov- I took the Good Friday-Easter Monday off, but that's it since mid-March I have worked every day, so has dh. I start about 8am, work until about 5:30, with 45 minutes out to make/eat lunch. Then I'm catching up in emails in the evening. Weekends I'm working less, but probably half a day Saturday half Sunday. DH is working 9-6, and then again much of the evening. I don't actually know what time he's finishing as tend to go to sleep at about 12:30. He's working weekends too.
We're both Key workers, and it's just mad how much our workload has increased.
The children mostly manage themselves with school work, thankfully, they're Y9 and Y6. I do manage some time with them each evening, and at the weekends.
At least there's no commute...

Mishaps?! Mixture!

That’s the same for me and my DH, with an 18 month old. I’m so tired that I just feel at a loss. I’m messing up at work and can tell some people are getting frustrated. My toddler is teething and so waking up so many times in night. He also is very clingy with me right now and constantly breastfeeding

Single parent, work full time and just managing my hours. 1 toddler. 🙈. It's knackering.

Single parent with 2 year old. Generally working 8.30-12 and 1-4 mostly in front of tv with every toy imaginable out and with short breaks for snacks / singing / music. I make the most of nap (1-3) and work couple of hours in the evening to catch up. Started taking some half days annual leave as doing that routine 5 days a week is hard on him as so boring and hard on me as knackering !

We both WFH at the moment in hectic jobs. Husband does 6am to 12pm then takes over looking after our 4yo while I work till 6pm. We always eat dinner as a family just after 6pm then our little one goes to bed around 8pm. I then power up the laptop again to carry on working. It's exhausting. Really wish we could have a strategy from the gov about how the lockdown could potentially be lifted. Instead we are just getting platitudes from the PM and lots of "It's too soon" from the press conferences. FFS could someone actually put forward the EXIT STRATEGY.

Basically echoing the above, both WFH FT, 15 month old, both got busier due to Covid/ oil price, doing 1.5-2 hr shifts and 3 ish hours each day at the weekend. Also I just started a new job in Feb as the old one was mega stressful and I was neve getting to see DS and spend any time as a family

It’s relentless. Social bubble will not help us as nearest relatives are 500 miles away - in laws are on a different continent.

A furloughed worker from nursery would be willing to babysit for us (which we could afford say 3 days a week 8-2 with what were savings from nursery) if social distancing were just relaxed a little to allow individuals to work in your home

Both full-time, 2 year old and 5 year old, so we have home-schooling too. We start work at 7am, finish at midnight, shifts in turn through the day when kids up. We're both working 10 hours a day. Can you work in evening after bedtime?

it’s so hard. Ours are 7 and 9 so although they can be left on their own, they have so much schoolwork to do. I just cannot concentrate on my work and dh is on conference calls all day.

DH and I are both working from home (he's doing it full time with relatively fixed hours, mine are a bit more flexible). DC are P2 and P7 (in Scotland) . The way it works for us is taking breaks at different times during the day to spend with the children, I also take a longer lunch break (as I am more flexible with what I do) We usually try to get the kids to do whatever doesn't need much of our help while we are working (arts and crafts stuff, reading - DS can help DD with this) and we focus on everything else mostly in the late afternoon and evening.

@Mrsdoubtfireswig

Almost exactly the same as me... I’m bloody knackered.

Just put DS down now need to drag myself downstairs, log a couple more hours work then tidy up the carnage of the day ... before getting up at 6.30 to do it all again. (not envy)

It's definitely knackering. DH can't work from home so it's me and 2 DC. I'm managing to do my 8 hours but the kids are having way too much screen time. Parts of my job we can't do from home so I try to make it into the office at least once a week but DH has to finish work early to facilitate this. Luckily we've both got understanding employers who are happy as long as the work is getting done.

@TheSheepofWallSt

I feel your pain ! Here’s a high 5 in solidarity ! 🖐

Miraculously I’ve tidied quickly tonight and just sat down now to start work 🙄

The only downtime I get is when I’m asleep...

My husband and I are both working and nursery for my 3yo is closed. Husband still goes to work and I've been able to work from home. I was full time but have reduced my hours slightly to 5.5 per day and my son is actually getting pretty good. We have routine so free play 9-11am, he knows I can't play too. 11am-12pm he does learning apps on the iPad. We then stop for lunch and after he watches a movie and will then play again until I finish. It's a lot more screen time than I'd usually allow but it's not forever

DH and I are both working full time shift work. We've had to arrange our shifts around each other. We never see each other and the way the shifts work means that I have to sacrifice sleep time. On Sat I had 3 hours, 3 hours Sunday, 4 hours today and am now on a night shift. I'll work to 4am, so will be in bed for 5 am and will be up with kids around 7.30 am so DH can go to work. I'm still homeschooling the 7 year old while entertaining a 2 year old, and trying to food shop etc. The house is a mess, I'm eating crap and living on coffee and I'm pretty much on the edge.

@NatalieH2220 well done on routine - I'm so jealous. My 4yo is delighted to have mummy and daddy at home with him and just will not do free play on his own for any extended period of time. Wish we could find a way to encourage him to play on his own more.

Hey,

Me and my hubby are both trying to work, I work for the nhs and do three days a week, work gave no option to be flexible at all so with no child care my partner, also a key worker, has no choice but to work around my hours so I do 3 he does 2, it works ok but he earns a much higher wage than me so financially we are struggling, as for the kids 2 and 9 months, they've gone though stages of frustration, bad behavior etc we try to do the whole nursery learning thing but it just stressed all of us out, so we make sure we all go out for a walk or the garden everyday, I allow tv in the morning until say 9.30 then no tv till 4pm, I try to get ideas in my head ready the night before so I'll try arts and crafts, reading, walk, then free play which is hard, we try to keep the house clean between us both which actually as two of us are on it now each day for an hour say, it's probably better than normal with just me trying to tackle it, but again I have stopped putting pressure on myself, we all see pics on fb etc of all the learning and stuff parents have done, it's great I love it, but no one is sharing the hard times or the bad days or the days kids may have a little too much tv, I tell myself, as long as my kids are happy and I'm happy the rest will take care of itself eventually.

Stress rubs off, as long as you try your best, cuddles the kids and do what you can with work that's amazing, everyone is struggling one way or another, I think we are all do a fantastic job with all this worry around us, well done to all us parents 👍🏻

Realistically, working 5-6 hours a day depending on naps.

We're both full time, I'm a key worker, but nursery shut. We have a 1year old LO who we obviously cant leave for any period of time, so splitting the childcare.

I can't do a lot of my job from home so I'm at least getting most of what I can do done, though things are beginning to fall behind.

To be honest it's mostly trying to do everything at once and feeling guilty and shit for doing it all badly.

Single mum working full time with a seven year old. Probably not doing my whole seven hours but my organisation is really supportive and flexible but still there’s a lot of screen time and I just feel permanently shattered. Fortunate to have a job, so trying to focus on the positive but quite angry that her dad isn’t bothered about seeing her despite knowing my current set up. So I struggle on. There’s a weird relief knowing others are battling the same problems that I am.

@tokirara We're on week 6 (I think?!) of this now so it's taken a while. We have a space where I work (spare room turned into office/playroom) and I think that's helped him understand the difference of when mummy can vs can't play too. It's hard when they're young and don't really understand the reason for the changes. Have you tried setting a timer? See if your LO will play for say 15 mins and then work up gradually.

I am NHS so need to go into work on my work days. DH is keyworker but can work from home. We are using childcare on my work days as he absolutely can't work with an 18month and 3yr old in the house - they need constant attention.
His work is also vital to running of an essential service right now so watching them instead is not an option no matter what others on here think. We both still log on once they are asleep and at weekends as work hours are not enough time to get it all done. I felt so guilty when lockdown was first announced that they would have to go childcare and potentially be exposed to risk but I've now made my peace with the decision
All of you working whilst also watching young children deserve a medal

Same here. Both trying to work from home, with 2 toddlers (2 and almost 4), plus a tween and an older teen.

I put in some hours in the morning, I find the little ones are good at just chilling, watching tv and pottering about until about 10/10.30 so I can get a good bit of work done between 7-10.30, then I take a bit of a break until about 2, with an eye on the email, then put in a couple of hours between 2-4, then catch up in evenings too.

My older kids help out more in the afternoon, with the tween doing some of his own school work in the mornings, then playing with toddler siblings in the aft for a bit.

It's hard going! I'm knackered!

With splitting the day we can manage nearly 7 hours each (6-13/13-19) though I guess it's actually more like 6.5 when you add in trip to kettle etc. It only works if the working parent hides in a separate room though!