TTC number 3 aged 42

[FiB83]

Hi

Not really sure what I'm looking for here but if nothing else I'll use this as a diary of my feelings etc. I joined a chat years ago for my first pregnancy and am still friends with some of those lovely ladies so hoping to find some people who are on their TTC journey and we can share experiences l.

As the title suggests I'm 42, I have two beautiful children aged 7 and 9, we decided to try for another baby a year or so again, I needed to lose some weight so did that although I'm still overweight according to my BMI but you know how it is... I'm fairly average at a size 14-16. I still have very regular cycles and don't believe I'm anywhere near the menopause yet....

Anyways, I'm 9dpo I think, I don't do opk or anything like that, tried one month but didn't enjoy feeling obsessed over it and it didn't work anyway..I feel I know my body quite well and am aware of the signs of when I'm ovulating if I am. With our first child it took a good 2 years with one chemical pregnancy in that time before.ewe actually got our baby. With our second child...well we thought about trying and then I was pregnant... Amazing how that happens isn't it!?

So here I am, 9dpo and with virtually no discharge at all. 2 days ago I had a huge amount of white cm that was abit stretchy. I've had a headache on and off and been soooo unbelievably emotional. This isn't normal for me but we are going through quite a bit with our youngest and other normal life events so may be that I suppose. I've had sore breasts and I swear they are bigger if that is even possible!.maybe just very slight cramps over the past couple of days but that maybe only.when I'm thinking about it...

Anyone else at this stage and fancy a buddy to compare notes? I'd love to chat.

@BurningOutt yeh it's always been like that for me. I've had 2 c sections though so perhaps that has something to do with it..I did have some investigation done after my second daughter but there was nothing untoward to I haven't really thought too much about it and actually it's every single month so I feel reassured by that fact

The cycle I conceived my first son, back in 2012, was really weird. I had ambiguous temperatures and a second patch of EWCF. Even though I was very experienced at fertility awareness (charting) by then, I thought I had ovulated and conceived a week later than I actually had. I know for sure it was on day 19 though because of the dating scan. Anyway, I'm pretty sure that's the only time in many years of charting that I've definitely had EWCF after ovulation -- I often had long cycles with multiple patches of it but in all the other cases the ovulation & temp rise was definitely after the last patch (or the cycle was anovulatory). So maybe it was a reaction to conception somehow, but I didn't observe it in any of my other pregnancies (two other babies + a few chemical pregnancies).

Sorry here's the chart, I tried and failed to attach it the first time.

But @DmcinT if you've seen EWCF today I think you should assume for now that you have not yet ovulated and keep trying. Especially if you are not temping so can't confirm ovulation.

Probably tmi but I do wonder if sometimes it's sperms and not ewcm

@FiB83 i think the way to tell is whether it is stretchy (EWCM) or not! I have looked into this before!

I got a bfp this morning at 10/11dpo. Mixture of shocked/scared/happy. I’ve had so many mcs now it’s only step 1 of many, but good news all the same.

Omgeeee!!! That is sooo exciting! Congratulations!share your pictures if you can! What were your symptoms? I hope this is a lucky thread for us all

I have creamy cm today at 2dpo very unusual for me! Usually I get this about 6/7dpo. I have read this confirms ovulation so here's going we caught this month as we dtd plenty!

Thank you @FiB83. I didn’t take a picture and am at work now but will do later. Only symptoms were cramping around implantation (8dpo onwards) and still
now, but I’m on progesterone and I think all symptoms can basically be put down to that.

Ive always been fortunate to conceive easily but my problem is holding on to the pregnancy so it’s going to be one day at a time.

Ah @BurningOutt huge congrats, I know it’s so nerve racking after a loss, your naive innocents is taken for all further pregnancies but I have everything crossed for you 🤞🏽

@FiB83 I had the creamy lotion cm at 1dpo but one weird wipe of clear ewcm yesterday which did throw me but gpt says it’s totally normal esp after having dtd a few hrs beforehand 🤷🏻‍♀️ I am so bloody hungry and cannot fill myself yesterday and today. I really hope this is a lucky thread for us all. Next month would leave us all due Christmas week!
I am also all crampy and kinda stiff feeling around my back/ hips (2-3 dpo today )

I am 43 and TTC number three. I have a one year old and a three year old and have had several miscarriages but always gotten over the miscarriages easily physically and pregnant easily until now. We’ve been trying for around 6 months but only recently stopped breastfeeding, so that may have had an impact.

Hoping I will get lucky a third time but very aware that time is ticking.

I started a thread asking for experiences TTC older and what worked and it got completely sidetracked into a question of whether I should even try - which wasn’t my question at all.

Nobody mentioned ubiquinol, I’ve never heard of it until now so I will look that up! And may also start taking CoQ10 and look into other supplements people here have mentioned.

Welcome @FightingTime I'm so hocked your thread got turned into questions about your decision to TTC, how rude! I've had 2 chemical pregnancies in my time, the most recent one was last April. and have two girls who are a bit older at 7 &9 now.

@BurningOutt it is never the same after any miscarriage but you're doing all you can. So hard to enjoy pregnancy or be excited when you have experienced loss but we will keep everything crossed and just take one day at a time. Crazy how many years I spent worrying about not getting pregnant and low here I am wishing for it

@DmcinT I know! I'm a Christmas baby myself so don't really want that if I'm honest! Hubby is early November and if I was to get pregnant this month we would lost likely have to have this baby around his birthday due to my history. I was told if have to have a section at 35 weeks next time but unless someone gives me a really good reason or there is something wrong if I do get pregnant there is absolutely no way i would agree to a section that early

@FightingTime welcome along, your in good company here with most of us roughly the same age and similar history to urself ❤️ where are u in ur cycle now? The only thing I take is pre conception pregnacare, it does have lots of those things u mentioned in it. I’ve oh on it for men also.

@FiB83 yeah I was thinking I’d much prefer it be a Nov baby than a Dec one (even though I’d obvs just be thrilled to be pregnant) I’ve also been told c section at 38 weeks if I’m pregnant again. 35 is early but whatever keeps u both safe ❤️

im off work today and way too much time on my hands googling all types of scenarios 😂

Haha @FiB83Both my partner and I have our birthdays in the week before Xmas and I am also ‘83 (I’m guessing by your user name), we would ideally wish to avoid a third Xmas birthday in this house! I’m honestly considering skipping this month but after 11 cycles, I know that would be madness!

Urgh just wrote a long message and it vanished. 🤦‍♀️
just catching up. Work has been hectic! Feeling so frustrated this month as DH wanted to stop the charting and just dtd every other day in fertile week and then after having sex around 4 days before (suspected) ovulation he didn’t want to again and kept making excuses so this month has been a total write off. He says he feels the pressure around ovulation to perform and then doesn’t enjoy it. I don’t really know what to do about that! I am just frustrated that I am taking all these expensive supplements and trying to eat healthily and then we don’t even have sex at the right time! Gah sorry for the rant!

@BurningOutt that’s great you got a positive! I know the feeling when you have loses, it takes a while to feel able to celebrate, keeping everything crossed for you.

@FightingTimeso sorry you’ve had to deal with comments like that, it’s none of their business. Ubiquinol is a form of CoQ10, and worth taking by the sounds of it. Have you read ‘it starts with the egg’? It’s quite a good book for looking at the studies into different supplements and what actually improves egg quality.

FWIW when we were ttc for our third (when I was 41) I just didn't tell DH where we were in the cycle. Obviously I tried to ensure we did it every other day or thereabouts until I was sure I'd ovulated but I didn't mention any of the detail to him unless he asked. Maybe a different situation though in that though he had eventually agreed to try for the third (and in the end was delighted with him) it was definitely me who really wanted it, so I was trying to be tactful! Though actually our successful conception after a couple of false starts was on a cycle on holiday when I wasn't paying as much attention as usual either.

@FightingTime when I was ttc no. 3 I didn't take anything other than ordinary vitamins + folic acid in the end. I did try an expensive supplement for one cycle (can't remember exactly what it was: but something that was supposed to help with egg quality) but it threw my cycle out and as I was sure I was ovulating anyway and had good ewcf etc I decided not to continue with it.

Thank you for the welcome.

@FlapJackeredNo I haven’t read It starts with the egg, this book is now on my list! I will be reading carefully for tips.

@overworkI had the same thought about a Christmas baby, but I think what if this month I ovulate my good egg and it was hiding here waiting for my March cycle? 😅 So I’ll keep trying!

@FiB83thank you, I’m sorry for the chemicals, it’s a rough journey. It’s reassuring to know how common it is not just to happen but also for people still to go on to have more babies after loss.

@DmcinTI’m on my period at the moment so another month I’m not pregnant or about to come up to my next chance, depending on how you look at it. I try to reframe it as early as possibly in the cycle to “my next chance is nearly here”. How about you? Fingers crossed for us both.

These are my tests yesterday (10/11 dpo) and today (11/12 dpo). Yesterday’s is the top and it actually looks darker to me? Actually regret testing again as the worry starts already.

@BurningOutt I don't think the darkness means anything at this point as it could literally be your urine was less concentrated. I know it's hard but try to think positively. If you're not bleeding the chances are everything is ok xxx so pleased for you!

Today I've got an ache in my boobs I'm just 2dpo I think maybe 3dpo so too early for symptoms spotting. Hubby insisted on dtd again just to make sure last night and I have to admit I'm really fed up of every other day just to make a baby..not spontaneous at all and samey...lol it gets like that when I feel its expected if you know what I mean. Just logging how I'm feeling now.woke this morning with a sore throat and blocked ears and praying Im not starting with a cold. Annual leave next week and I have things I wanted to do!

@FlapJackered that is so frustrating, we had a similar situation this month so I stopped telling him abt opks. U might just have to be selective with what u tell him, like oh yeah it’s prob around those few days, im not tracking etc but obvs u will know exactly what’s happening and where u are 😅

@FightingTime yes i always allow myself to be sad at it for a day or so and then think well this could be the first day of a new pregnancy.. positive vibes 🤞🏽 I am on roughly 3 or 4 dpo now so symptom spotting like mad lol
I track my RHR, it dips for a day or 2 around ovulation and then has a steady rise until roughly 10dpo if not pregnant or keeps rising/ stays high if pregnant. I had a dip from monday - Wednesday and now it’s shot up so I’ll be watching it like a hawk!

I am all kinda stiff and light cramps around my back since Monday. I am so warm today 🤷🏻‍♀️

we are off Monday and Tuesday for st Patrick’s day so I’ll be overthinking every twinge wondering if it’s implantation! Would prefer to just have the distraction of work

@BurningOutt i wouldn’t worry about the darkness of line at this point as hydration, what you’ve eaten, time of day etc can all have such an impact so early on.
Will u go for an early scan? Have you been to go yet?

@FiB83 same with the symptom list, it’s nice to have a wee record of it to look back on! I’ve flu like symptoms also actually, just runny nose and sore throat.

I've been reading this thread and thought I'd commented, but turns out I hadn't!

I'm 41 and trying for my second. My son was a happy accident so I may have been a bit naive in hoping it'd be straightforward again. Only on my second cycle of trying but first cycle totally threw me by only being 18 days long 😬 I only stopped breastfeeding last month so praying that's a factor and I'm not just hurtling into peri...

Taking every supplement I've seen recommended (must be rattling!), using OPKs and just started temping today.

@BurningOutt congratulations on your BFP and I really hope it sticks, I know the anxiety will be tough to handle xx

@Sa11yCinnamon welcome 🤗
had ur period returned before u stopped breastfeeding? I am still breastfeeding and wondering if it’s affecting our chances. I don’t really want it to be the reason we stop but might have to accept it and try weaning her off

@DmcinT yeah my period came back after around 6 months and I breastfed til 20. I was only feeding at bedtime by the end so it's unlikely but I read that it would still stimulate prolactin overnight, which has a stronger effect than during the day, and tbh I have to cling on to any hope that it's not all over for me.