2023 TTC 35+ Part 5

[VixFromThe6ix]

Hi lovelies,

New thread!!

Please tag whoever you can so everyone knows we are here.

@FigandHoney here if you're over 35 and had two MCs or have been trying over 6mos you can ask for help from fertility clinic. They run all the tests, bloods, ultrasounds, etc. Then they base next steps off of that if you need some fertility drugs they give you and watch you keep trying while simultaneously putting you on the IVF waiting list (if that's what you're after).
In my case now I thankfully haven't had a Mc since my son but because of my age and my history I contacted the clinic and basically said, I need your help we are trying again. So we went through all the tests again but this time issue was my husband. At which point we decided to start doing IUI. I'm grateful we were seen shortly after we contacted the clinic again. Maybe because we were previous patients as a friend of mine wanted to get an appointment to my doctor and she was told it's like a 4-5mos wait. So they went with a private clinic instead.
It's different in every country I'm sure, I'm always curious how things work because when I read on these forums sometimes I just wonder why don't you do this or that...but then I learn it's because the process is totally different. One good example was how easy I got progesterone and how some girls couldn't get it and their doctors won't give it to them. Just different.

@VixFromThe6ix I am really sorry about what happened with your son and everything you had to go through 💔
Yes it does seem to be very different in each country.
My understanding is that they are unlikely to give you progesterone here. Although I have heard they are trialling it in certain areas.
Also I believe that because I already had a son, I would be unlikely to qualify for additional help if I ended up needing it to ttc our second. Unless I went private. Which in tge UK isn't really covered by even work scheme health insurances. So really expensive.
So I think if we do end up struggling to ttc our 2nd, I will probably just resign myself to not having a second.
My son is wonderful. I love him so much. And am so grateful to be his mum. So it's not the end of the world.
But I would love to give him a sibling if I can, for when me and my husband aren't around anymore. After losing my dad, I know how important that can be.

Pregnancy loss review - was july this year

In the uk you can get progesterone when bleeding after just one miscarriage now

Ah thanks @worldwidetravel2017 . I did not know that. Wasn't the case when we were ttc the first time.
Do you know if that's also the case if you already had one child?

I think if you have a miscarriage / early miscarriage - ( / present tense / recently/2023) - then that's definitely given / ' allowed' if you bleed next time etc

Not too sure of exact ins & outs but new ruling means none of this wait til 3 miscarriages for help biz

After our early miscarriage - dr said ' tell me about it ' .
& asked what we were guna do - my reply - try again..

Its all documented on records
And i made sure paper work a & e gave me when seen re early miscarriage - went onto my records

Tommys know a lot about it - tommys baby charity - they have info you can give to a Dr if they dunno about the rule change / updates - i get their email mail outs etc - one had a link that was click here for progesterone info / changes info / The new guidelines / new advice

I’m so confused and upset. Predicted 12DPO here & a BFN. Not even a hint of a line. I checked over messages to a friend & the last time I got veiny boobs was when I was pregnant. I’m still not spotting like I usually do & I’m getting lots of cramps & twinges. I don’t understand what’s going on. I didn’t sleep at all last night because I was convinced I was pregnant & this morning I’m shattered & devastated. AF due Wednesday or Thursday.

@happytobemrsg so sorry to hear this. I think testing early can sometimes cause so much upset. Maybe test again on Wednesday or Thursday? Sending so much love and comfort to you.

Morning all... Pretty sure this is another early loss. I'd be delighted with these tests if I'd got them a week ago but I should be 5weeks on Tuesday so it's not looking great. And yes, I'm pretty sure I know when I ovulated as used opks and got a clear peak. My first positive was also almost a week ago. I just hope it doesn't all drag on too long. I'm really struggling at this point. This has been such a crappy year. MMC in April and then two early losses one after the other and right on my original due date month. I'm feeling really despondent right now. Sorry to be a complete downer on a Monday morning. Hope everyone else is ok. Looks like I'll be back to TTC again very soon. Although not sure I can take much more right now. 😞

Oh I am so sorry @SnookyPook . Is there any change you just naturally have a slow HcG rise? I remember being quite concerned about my digital test not progressing fast enough in my last pregnancy. I just checked and at 5 weeks with my son I also got a 1-2 weeks pregnant.
I am still really hoping this turns out positive for you. And Hooe I am not giving you false hope.
Can you speak to a GP? Any chance you could request a blood test?

@happytobemrsg I am sorry about the BFN. But there still is time to get a BFP. Maybe Hcg levels just aren't high enough yet. You aren't out until AF arrives

So no AF yet for me this morning. But still have spotting.
My bbt went up again this morning. But I think my rhr has now started a downward trend.
I did take a test this morning because technically I am a day late. But it was BFN. So I think it's just a matter of AF coming in slowly. I guess this is my new normal pattern

@FigandHoney thank you. I do think I'm someone with lower starting HCG - even with my son, the tests at 15/16dpo were real real squinters. However I did still get 2-3 and 3+ in the right timeframes. I don't know. I guess there is still a tiny glimmer of hope until there isn't but after the year I've had I just can't trust that iffy looking tests could be anything other than bad news. It is nice to hear a story where the 1-2 was wrong though. I know there's lots about CB being a bit unreliable. It's just combined with my other tests that don't seem to have changed much, I don't feel overly hopeful.

I'm actually waiting to hear back from GP about some bloods I had done last week and I had sneakily managed to convince them to do an HCG one as well, so when they call back, I might explain and ask for a repeat. I gues that would give a pretty good indication of how things are looking.

Gargh I hate feeling so down again and it being so dependent on where I'm at in the tww/conception/loss cycle. It's exhausting.

Hi all...
@SnookyPook I recognise your name from the other thread. Sending bagloads of good luck and baby dust in your direction. It's ever so tempting to say something trite about your body preparing for pregnancy and at least conceiving this month, but you'd probably be justified in wanting to throttle me so I'll just offer a handhold and hope you get your sticky one soon. x

Glad to have seen this thread as I feel super old TTC #1 at 38. Realised when my period started two days ago that even if I conceive next month that'll make me 39 by due date. I had hoped it'd all go quickly and I'd have time for two, and it is due to rather sad circumstances that it has taken this long to even start trying. I daren't tell anyone irl cos medically it's a bad idea but I'm secretly hoping the twins in the family genes may be on my side...
Phew, good to get that out!

Now I will stop being Debbie Downer and instead say hi all and sprinkle round some good vibes and baby dust for us all, those waiting in hope and those of us going to the next month of trying. May we all not know each other very long at all! (Or perhaps find each other on the preggers board!!)✨

So sorry @SnookyPook ❤️ like you say there is still a bit of hope that your HCG is maybe rising slowly, but I know that doesn’t take away from how you’re feeling this morning. Especially getting a negative on a digital, it just feels like it hits harder doesn’t it?

i hope you can be kind to yourself today as you’re feeling down, sending you a massive hug. We are all here for you xx

@FigandHoney promising that your BBT went up again today! I hope AF doesn’t arrive for you x

@VixFromThe6ix I saw you got a BFP, and wanted to say congrats and good luck for your first scan. It's lovely news! Hope you're finding the wait okay. Feels like we're always waiting on this journey....

@SnookyPook my fingers are crossed for you. The uncertainty is awful. I remember this being an important month for you, and it really sucks you're having to deal with this right now. Those tests are rubbish, and hopefully the bloods will be clearer.

Hope everyone else is doing well x

@SnookyPook I think 1-2 is about the right level for nearly 5 weeks pregnant, as it's the number of weeks since conception, not since the start of your cycle. So it counts from implantation and when the hormone levels started rising..so depending when you had implantation will depend on the result. I don't think these tests are showing you're having another early loss at all. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you

The nhs add 2 weeks to the cb tests ..

However - if your expecting to be 5 weeks - - unfortunately could be a loss

Depends how long its been 1 - 2 weeks 4

We had a loss last month

Gynae advised me not to use cb how many weeks in future

Mine flashed up 3 plus
For legit 2 seconds
Then stuck on 1 - 2
.was v sad news 4 us.

Hope you get better news
Sending luck & hope @SnookyPook

Still no spotting here & feeling pregnant despite BFN this morning. Boobs are bigger & new blue veins seem more pronounced. Going to hold off testing & just wait & see. Praying I just implanted late but feeling very sad today.

@SnookyPook when is your blood test?

Sorry I lose track, how many dpo are you and when is AF due for you @happytobemrsg

@Catson I don’t use OPKSs so judging by EWCM & O pain I think I’m 12DPO today. AF is due Wednesday or Thursday

You're exactly the same as me @happytobemrsg. Literally identical on all accounts. We've got time yet 🤞🏻🤞🏻

Have you tested at all @Catson ? I was so, so convinced when I saw the veiny boobs. Now I fed lost

Oh yeah @happytobemrsg, every day since about 8dpo 😂😂😂😂 negative every time 😅

@Catson I don’t think I could cope! I’m going to try really hard & wait until Thursday at the earliest. Although I just noticed very light pink discharge (almost peachy in colour). Of course I’ve now been googling 12DPO implantation bleeding 🤦🏻‍♀️

Could I have implantation bleeding today 12DPO & that’s why I need to wait a little longer for a BFP? Or am I crazy & just clutching at straws?!? It’s just my blue veiny boobs which are confusing me … 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yep
That could be a thing