TTC 35+ Thread 13 (hopefully not unlucky for some!)

[thislittlebird]

I didn't realise the old thread had reached capacity until I hit 1000 so here's a new one. Thread 13 but feels more like 130 for me. New folks welcome, some of us have been hanging out here way too long and would like to alight already!

I've tagged a few of you...

@Tinkerbell098
@Marvellouslymadmum
@KatRee
@Hoping43
@ShirleyValentineManc
@Cally1980

[thislittlebird]

@MiaTTC2
@MiaKay
@Carla2601
@Tofu35
@MargotChateau

Sorry if I've missed anyone who was active lately, I've skimmed the last page for names to tag.

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird thanks! How are you doing? I’ve not been on in a little while but I’m day 3 stims….

[thislittlebird]

@Carla2601 hellllooo! I'm ok, just on the other side of a demon migraine from hell so that was fun. Started Wednesday lunchtime, peaked Thursday, eventually, finally feeling more human tonight. Post IVF the migraines definitely seem more intense, will assume my hormones are recalibrating somehow!

Very exciting you've started stims, what are you on? How's it been so far?

I'm due for transfer this month but a bit worried because I've asked for a natural FET to avoid taking extra oestrogen (pretty sure I have too much anyway with the migraines and recurrent thrush in my cycle) but I'm on holiday from Tuesday for a week until cd 11 and they'd want me to come in for a scan on cd 9 or 10. I'm hoping they can be flexible, I don't want to wait another month to know if this one will work or not.

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird that does not sound fun - glad you’re on the mend and great to have a holiday booked. Where are you heading? Yes hopefully they can - keep us posted.

Actually fine so far - I’ve done all my jabs myself and I had my first scan on Friday (lining 3mm and 6 and 6 follicles and no cysts). They said that was fine, Google seemed to imply it was low so idk what to think. Next scan Monday so I’ll see what’s happened (I’d only done one jab by Friday). Just on gonal f for now (225)

[thislittlebird]

@Carla2601 only to Scotland, but both of us haven’t been before and we’re doing a little tour of a few areas so should be nice. Looks like the weather is getting bloody cold next week there!

6 and 6 is fine I think. I think I only had 11 or something on the first scan and 15 eggs were retrieved in the end. I was on gonal f too!

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird oh fun! Will be lovely. I’ve done the cities but keen to do the rural areas at some point. Have a lovely time.

Oh ok that’s good - I was a bit worried that that was the max and then half might be no good so you’ve reassured me. Pushing for our nhs round too (they told me to put in a complaint as they messed up my funding application) so might end up with back to back retrievals…if I can resist a transfer if we’re lucky enough to get to that stage.

Are you at guys? I’m thinking of choosing them because the one doing my tests and funding are really not doing well admin wise (gave me all the wrong email addresses so all my results and emails went unanswered and also did the same to my GP)

[thislittlebird]

@Carla2601 I’ve never been so we’re doing Edinburgh and Inverness but also some rural touring and hiring a car once we’re in Inverness. Should be fun.

When I was having my scans some nurses wouldn’t count the smaller ones so there were more like 19 growing but only 15 were big enough but I wanted all the info 😂. We got 4 embryos frozen from that which I’m pleased with, but just worried by how long it will take to transfer the 4 (a year???) and being aware I’m 39 in May and might need to do another retrieval or more.

Hopefully you can sort the nhs round too. Guys have been good but slow waiting to start and I’m not sure how you skip the waiting list at Guys, it was a few months of waiting for retrieval for me. It’s not a long wait compared to some nhs places though, and some are better. I can’t fault the facilities or the staff now I’m there.

What’s the deal with your partner, how does that all work? Do they do the retrieval in advance?

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird they said they should be able to bump me up the list because they messed up (should have been put in the system in January and they basically forgot 🙈) and she’d said to me on the phone I’d be able to start in a few weeks….although maybe she was just wrong! Haha.

4 is a lot, well done you!!! I would also go straight to transfer it’s hard to wait isn’t it knowing they’re there (and do another retrieval I mean). I’m 35 but have similar feelings about what if I should do another retrieval (ideally we’d like two but let’s try and just get one for now!!!).

They did him a while ago now - it was loads and top quality they said so that’s a relief. Such a funny position to be in because in theory everything we have is fine but still so nervous it won’t work.

That sounds like a lot of fun - and really nice to get away pre transfer. My transfer should be around the 11th if we’re lucky enough to get to that stage so we might be able to cheer each other on 😊😊

[thislittlebird]

@Carla2601 They might speed it up then. I wish they'd done that for us, we lost months and months to their cockups and nothing was done, got treated like shit tbh. February to August was just bloody dicking around and complaints. I won't pretend I'm not annoyed they don't take age into account. 39 is getting to a point of running out of time ffs, we started when I was 36. But at least we've made some progress for now.

Four was such a relief, and I think the last one might be the lesser quality but they never said that, although it was frozen a day later. You just don't know how it'll go, it's all so unpredictable. I want to get through these 4 by the autumn ideally but my understanding is there's a there month wait between transfers and I will cross the bridge of how we can speed things up (pay for private??? dunno) when we get past transfer number one because I need to be doing another collection in 2022, not 2023. At least being 35 is a bit less of a worry, if you do a retrieval at 36 it's better than 40 if you know what I mean.

I'm sure it'll work fine, they seem happy with the quality. Are they doing ICSI?

I think my transfer will be late April if they let me go ahead that is, I'll have a meltdown if they don't. I've asked them if I can go for a scan day 11/12 instead of 9/10.

I've found the wait between collection and transfer very hard. But I wasn't in a good way after the collection, I was very concerned by OHSS and getting pains in the tips of my shoulders. It stressed me out a lot, I think waiting has allowed me to feel better, but it's swings and roundabouts.

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird I think you’ve made the right call for you - if you’ve got concerns it’s not the right time for transfer. I haven’t been given a choice as yet they just said they’re coming out on either Monday or Wednesday week after next and then back in 5 days later if there is anything to go back in. At the lister they say normally one cycle so if unsuccessful I think they’d try again for June (again presuming there was another one to transfer) but I would probably go NHS egg retrieval one instead if that was an option.

I’m not sure about the scan day for me….it’s funny because by my calculations I’ll be due af days before I should know if I’m pregnant but I guess not if they’re delaying ovulation. They don’t tell you much at my clinic (well they probably do if it’s not fine but thus far they’re like all good off you go 😂). It’s weird but i feel like if it works it’s almost been less stressful - just whizzing through each appointment

[thislittlebird]

@Carla2601 what frustrated me is I felt a little pressured by the nurses towards the fresh transfer m. Like all steam ahead choo choo 🚂 and they didn’t listen to what I was saying as much as I’d like. But I think that’s them just doing what they do day in day out meanwhile I’m freaking out.

For the first frozen FET with Guys it’s your second period after EC, but I’m fairly sure after that one you have to join the FET waiting list which is longer. That’s why I’ll have to find out what that’s all about if transfer one fails and maybe ask if paying speeds it up.

I suppose the progesterone delays it? I haven’t quite worked all that out, too far ahead. Do you have short cycles?

It probably is less stressful and you’ve got a good chance. Chances are less good at 38-40 because of egg quality so I just have to hope it doesn’t take too many rounds. For me the stress has all been in the waiting. It’s been a very long slog to get here.

[Carla2601]

@thislittlebird I think that will be the challenge for me on cycle two with the nhs (assuming that’s where we end up). It’s so speedy with the lister - they actually wanted to start me in Feb but my af was due same day as oh sperm retrieval so it felt like too much stress (also if there’d been no sperm then what?!). But I do like the speed. We’re at the two year mark now which I know is less time than you but it still feels like an eternity….and my bro is now having his third!!!

My cycles are 27 days so fairly average I’d say - and maybe they’re just managing my expectations and they’ll do retrieval sooner than they’ve said, they’ve said it could be up to another week on Friday which would be 16 days after I started but could also be the Monday so 12 days so who knows. Maybe I’ll get an indication tomorrow (although they said I won’t know for sure till Friday). I haven’t had any progesterone yet….not looking forward to that experience haha! I think we’re a fairly unusual case in that they’re saying sperm quality good and egg indicators good….but I guess you don’t know until you try. I’m really really hoping it’ll be April for you and that it’ll work first time, you’ve earned it x

[Marvellouslymadmum]

Yay I've found you! That took me a while 😂 thanks for setting up the new thread @thislittlebird

[Carla2601]

@Marvellouslymadmum I was wondering where you all where! Glad you made it. How are you doing?

[Marvellouslymadmum]

@Carla2601 not too bad here thanks, think I finally ovulated a couple of days ago, now cd36 today, had tonsillitis but still managed to dtd almost every day. I feel like it wasn't a very strong ovulation though even though I'm now on 100mg clomid 🤷🏼‍♀️ how about you?

[Carla2601]

@Marvellouslymadmum that’s commitment to the cause!! Well done haha. Hope you're feeling better??

Still stimming away, hoping for collection op date on Monday morning (should be Wednesday). Then we wait and see I guess. Bit fed up of people not knowing and therefore not being able to go to stuff (also have to be home by 7 which doesn’t work great with my job) but I’m muddling through and it’s nowhere near as bad as I expected so far. Surprised myself that I can do my own injections so that was a little win

[ShirleyValentineManc]

Hey girls. Another month goes by, still pregnancy less! I hope some of you have good news, whatever your situation is.
Looking forward to many short weeks and warm weather. Trying to look forward.
Lots of hugs to you all

[HollyA79]

Hi ladies, just recently joined here and been on my TTC journey for a while now, I'm 42 with a very low AMH and diminished ovarian reserve so my chances are pretty low but my partner and I want to really do everything we can before we give up!. Just had a failed cycle at the Lister and for a number of reasons have decided to move clinics to ARGC. I'm waiting for AF which is due on the 7th and then will start a monitoring cycle with them. Very happy to chat and answer any questions if you are earlier in your journey and hope you are all ok. It's a tough process and hard for it not to be all consuming so I get it! Holly xx

[Marvellouslymadmum]

@Carla2601 feeling a little better thank you. Now not entirely convinced I've ovulated as still getting mid opk and no raised temp! Thinking this is going to be a loooooong cycle. Will go for blood test on Friday anyway to see

Hi @HollyA79 I just turned 43 and have a low amh too, can't decide if this clomid doesn't work (which I don't think it will) if I should try for ivf, egg donor or adoption. Good luck for your next round! Xx

[thislittlebird]

@HollyA79 welcome to the thread!

@Marvellouslymadmum glad you found us!

@Carla2601 did you have EC?

@ShirleyValentineManc pregnancy less R Us 🙌. hope you’re doing ok.

How’s everyone? We just got back from Scotland yesterday. Was a cool trip! Luckily we had some good weather and got some exploring done. Here’s one of many amazing snaps we got of the Highlands!

Went into the clinic for my first FET scan today. I knew I wouldn’t be ready to roll, but they insisted I come in day 9/10. Today is day 12, I had 16 follicles on one side, 19 on the other and no dominant follicle 🙃. So back in I go on Monday to see if any of them want to take the lead and actually pop out so I can do a transfer. I have to start testing for ovulation, I’ll bet I can’t get a positive OPK but I shall try!

[ShirleyValentineManc]

Wow @thislittlebird that's Scotland, looks like the US!
We've got our consultant app 11th May at Manchester RI to start whatever treatment they see fit
@HollyA79 any experience would be great to hear.

[thislittlebird]

@ShirleyValentineManc ikr? Honestly the Highlands and Cairngorms were amazing, I didn’t realise just how scenic they were until I was there. We got some good weather and went right across from Inverness to the west coast, we wouldn’t have been so confident to drive on some of those roads in bad weather. What’s the plan now for you guys?

[ShirleyValentineManc]

Well we've got good ovulation,sperm, eggs, the whole shabam!
So no reason why after 22 months no live birth (my god the terms we start using!)
Think we'll have to have full IVF, because you can't treat a non-existent issue!
Can't wait to get pregnant!

[thislittlebird]

@ShirleyValentineManc it can take a while for some folks so maybe you’re just in that unlucky bunch.

I can’t even imagine it after all this time lol

[Carla2601]

@Marvellouslymadmum hopefully they can shed some light Friday - let us know how you go

@HollyA79 welcome! Glad you’ve joined ☺️

@thislittlebird your trip sounds incredible! Will definitely have to plan a trip. Fingers crossed for Monday and good luck with the OPK - keep us posted!

Yes I had it today - we got 15 eggs which I’m thrilled about, although no indication yet of quality or fertilisation rate so I’m not getting carried away.