O Come all ye Viroids, joyful and triumphant. Deck the halls with Contraband. All I want for Christmas is a BFP! Just Shag all the way (no36)

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Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 35 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy Christmas shagging, shaggers!

Afternoon all! Yep news of his redundancy is pretty shitty to say the least!

He's in a specialist role so the exact jobs are few and far between, but he has other experience (from within the same company) and jobs in those areas are more popular so hopefully shouldn't take him too long she says fingers crossed There may also be positions within other departments at the same company so he has to weigh up the redundancy package against extending his service there... We shall see! Lost of thinking to do!

He will get a good pay out so that's one good thing!

Not putting ttc on hold though as we are both confident that's theres a positive spin in this some where. I can keep us going on my salary and he won't be leaving until April at the earliest - giving him plenty of time to look around.

And relax! Cleaning done! Knackered now lol!

So AF is due Sunday for me, so will I be next to test??

Thats such a good way of looking at it kez, sounds like there are loads of different options available for you. Glad to see you wont stop TTC because of it. People always say you cant really plan for a baby anyways.

Ooh lil are you having ivf? SO exiting! When will it all be happening?

Have you thought about taking Vit B6 Honey to lengthen your cycle? I tried it one month and went 5 days over! Now I take it every other day with B complex to lengthen by a few days to give the bean a chance to stick.

Oh my god I am so spotty today! I am lucky enough to only get the occasional spot but I have about 5! How dare they infringe on my face! Grrr!

I may try it Dot, I know it worked well for La. I do ice on day 13 though so get a good 12 days before AF turns up. I think its

I think anything over 10 is fine. Although I take a low dose of B6 anyway, just cos, you know, why not

yes dot first ivf cycle for dc1. egg collection and transfer due w/c 26/1 but obv not certain.

jelly if you are getting highs still AF is not due Sunday. I think you'll ov late and get AF 2weeks later. ur in for a long cycle IMO.

honey hooya for you. temp dips and triphasic charts can't predict shit. stop temping after you've confirmed icing. you'll drive yourself insane I speak from experience

bruises on thighs. won't be going swimming! luckily they don't hurt for long. just stay black for a while!

Lil I genuinly do think the monitor has missed my peak (apparently it's not uncommon in the first month of using it). I am getting all the pre-AF symptoms; sore boobs, spotty face, bloatedness, sickness, back ache etc. So I really do think she's on her way! (Plus, I don't want a long cycle, EoD shagging is wearing me out lol!

I am genuinely please with how much housework I got done today! Plus i went to Ikea and bought some new units for cheap! Win win!

Awww Jelly hopefully it's just missed it and that you will be getting happy lines on a different type of stick soon gx

I've just had a second day with a positive opk and am wondering how I know when I iced? How long does the LH surge go on for? I thought it was just a day so surprised when I got the second +I've. People on here seem to know exactly and can say how many dpo they are.

I think OPK's can pick it up between 12-36 hours before ovulation, but don't quote me on that.

I hope it's just missed it too! The second line was fainter today that it has been for about 6 days. I'm hoping tomorrow it drops down to a low again!

Thanks Lil, i needed that!

Muddy, to quote Lil, i nearly always ice on the 2nd day of positives.

Ok thanks so I guess that means if I got the first +ive yesterday then I iced today? Makes sense as my belly's been all crampy.

so you're now 1dpo Muddy :D gratsssssss

No Jelly, she's 1dpo tomorrow, surely. If today is second peak, she is icing right now!

Sorry Muddy... Saying she is rude of me.

A slightly late CONGRATULATIONS to mountain, Woohoo!!

Jelly gx the witch will stay away and you can poas Sunday.

I'm also sitting here pleased at a nice tidy and clean house .... (due to my cleaner coming for the first time in 3 weeks, lazy lazy me).
Who is joining jelly with poas this weekend? Maybe Mountain has started a bfp trend for Jan ????

gx she has started a trend! :)

sorry muddy read your thing wrong, Honey is of course right you are 1 dpo tomorro!!

jelly i've had months with no peaks but it went back to low based on stick readings, not just when i'd run out of sticks, so i genuinely think it must be picking up some fp hormones. I just don't want you to get your hopes up if af is a no show and it's just because you haven't iced. i guess i know the disappointment of af being late and it being nothing but my body f'ing about, trying to protect you from it!!

honey well quoted!

muddy get shagging just in case, and shag again tomorrow just in case. There was one occasion i iced day after 2nd positive, but honey is right, usually on the last positive day if i had more than one. if there was only one i iced day after the pos opk.

Thanks lil I won't get hopes up as if but I am deffo get AF symptoms and the second line on monitor was lighter today so can only assume what ever the second line reads is going away!

The shagging has commenced this month for me viroids can't say I'll be hitting a jelly-like high but hoping to get a good few in before I ice this time next week

How has everyone been coping with the first full working week of the year? Personally I can't wait for a lie in tomorrow!!

Morning all, happy Friday! Seriously happy that its almost over Jcandy, its been a tough week trying to get back to normal.

We are moving into our new flat this weekend after 4 months living with my sister. I love her, but will never EVER live with her again.

Oh honey you right you prob dont need B6 as you ice on CD13. Thats a great cycle! You get one more go in a year than most of us. I ice on CD18 so I think I might need those extra days.

Two more weeks of needles lil then its show time!

Why cant MN handle commas? I keep having to go through and take them all out.

Get your disco pants on JC :) I've only been back at work 1 day, then had 4 days off this week, so next week is going to be difficult (plus I have something like 12 meetings next week.....)

ANOTHER high today! I just want a low now (or a peak to confirm ovulation). I can only assume the monitor is reading SOMETHING but I have no idea what! I've had something like 18 days of High readings I think! Still I guess it's better than 18 days of low's eh! And DP wanted to shag every day of a high...lol!

I've never noticed the comma thing dot, how odd! Good luck with moving this weekend. I am currently trying to convince DP to get a new kitchen. I saw on in Ikea that I loved and we have a tiny kitchen so I don't think it'll be too expensive.

In fact, comma's work for me....random!

I understand completely dot you feel very grateful to them for letting you stay but it's an absolute nightmare! Hope the move goes ok!

Lucky you jelly it probably will hit you next week. Hope your monitor sorts itself out soon. It's frustrating when things don't happen how you expect them to

I'm used to things not quite going to plan but just frustrated more than anything lol! Maybe lil the oracle is right about a long cycle!

Thanks Jcandy It has been great to stay with them for a while, but Im so excited to have my own space again.

Especially my own kitchen even though its tiny. Tiny kitchens are great Jelly, heres hoping your DP says yes to a new one. What is happening with your cycle?! Sounds like your having a crazy one this month.

Maybe work comp just cannot handle the comma's

Oooh that one worked!