Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

Hello all, would love to join you. Im 40 and TTC no 2. Been trying for about 3 cycles so far. To my huge suprise i was lucky with no 1 and got pregnant relatively quickly. But think it will be bit different this time.

Im still BF my DD who is 18 months now (2 or 3 times per day but not at night). Is anyone else in that situation? I know you can conceive when BF... but at 40 perhaps not... ?! So thinking maybe i shd cut down/stop to improve my chances. Does anyone know?

Good luck to everyone!

God Morning ladies.
There's been a lot going on in the thread, so I may not namecheck everyone.

Welcome Mozzarella. I am so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. I do hope you find us all very supportive here, and that you'll be newly pregnant soon. To me,you are still young! I am the oldest bird on this thread and envy anyone who is only 41.

Calibee, I am not sure about the OPKs, but I have my doubts about ovulation, mainly because, usually, the body won't gear up for ovulation until all HCG is out of your system, and it appears it isn't quite all gone if you got a faint positive. The opks pick up LH and something else I think, and we always have LH in our systems, but if the test was as dark as the the other line, then it is possible you may be having an LH surge. So it is possible?

Reading back on that, I don't think I am much help.Sorry!

Greenlizard, having a drop in temperature and a bit of blood can certainly mean implantation. How exciting.

Willaiamina, I'm sorry the medical profession is so bloody insensitive. I really do think they should see you face to face to explain what it all means to you. You need to know how the PCOS diagnosis will impact on your fertility, if you need to use fertility drugs,or what your next move is. I think many women with PCOS finds it improves with lifestyle changes (for example a low carb diet) and often use clomid. Can you see your GP to discuss it and perhaps get a referral to a specialist?

The care in Australia is quite different. After my second miscarriage, at my request, my doctor ordered a tonne of tests. I was also able to request, after each ERPC to have the tissue tested for chromosomal defects and infection. I also got a referral to a fertility clinic when I asked (but didn't go ahead as my DH was not supportive).

Well, now that I am into week 2 of the tww I am feeling a lot less positive about getting a bfp. I don't have nearly so many symptoms and do feel silly for noticing them all. Even after ttc for this long I still feel hopeful month after month,then feel sad about not getting pregnant. But life goes on and I am not going to let it spoil things.

And I did cave (no backbone whatsoever) and tested this morning (9 dpo I think) and it was very,very clearly negative!

Hi Skylark, if you are ovulating, then you can definitely get pregnant whilst breastfeeding. Many women do and often keep BF during pregnancy. I fell pregnant (but had to wait til he was about 17 months for my fertility to return)when I was breastfeeding my DS, but unfortunately miscarried. I was so upset that I actually thought the BF may have contributed to the miscarriage and shortly after weaned my son. I regret it as I now know the BF in no way contributed to the miscarriage. I found out that the baby had a trisomy,which was due to chromosomal defects).

Welcome to the thread

oh hopeful keep your chin up and don't you dare feel silly! Remember last month I was bleeding and still hoped I might have a chance of being pregnant? Now that is silly! .

I know what you mean about having lots of symptoms that then seem to fade. I have woken this morning feeling even more like AF is on her way (my nose spot now has a friend on my chin , I feel crampy in front whereas yesterday it was more backache and my nipples are definitely less sensitive). Although to confuse matters my temps were up again this morning from 36.41 to 36.76 (my cover-line is 36.44 so am guessing yesterday was a blip. They haven't taken the dive yet....)

Ah, what the hell, I have given up any pretence that i am not going to test every day until AF arrives... today's results -DPO10 - BFN

I get the results of my 21 day progesterone test later today (I feel quite nervous about it) In one way I want it to be low so they can give me some magic pill/pessary and I will get pregnant very quickly but on the other I want it to be strong result so there will be a good chance we can conceive (even with assistance)

Sigh. Ladies hope you all have good days

xx

Feeling everything that both gum and lizard describe. All so damn familiar.

In fact it has made me take a deep breath and remind myself that all the temping, poas, charting etc...is all supplementary to the cause and not the cause. I think I was getting over-excited yesterday at my pos opk, and from now on I am taking a deep deep breath. My body will do what it does, when it does it...and there is no amount of checking that will make any difference to that. I guess having the mc and it being my 43rd birthday next week is raising a certain amount of panic inside of me.
tina let us know you are ok.
Welcome to skylark.

Morning Calibee you're absolutely right about opks/temping etc, and chilled is the way to go. I was thinking about your pos opk on the way back from the school run (as you do) and thought could it be that the pos opk was picking up the remaining hcg? I know opks show pos when you;re pregnant, but there again if the second line was very strong that would indeed suggest ovulation . Will you do another today? (in a chilled way of course )
Gum gaaah you tested!!! I would have done the same though You too lizard!!! You do know you're going to have to carry on testing everyday now don't you now that you've opened pandora's box... Still early days for both xx
Welcome to the newbies - no judging here mozarella, this is a safe space.
How are things Tina? Please pop in and tell us when things are fine
Well you know I'm not ttc-ing, but in the interests of snug research repository I have been taking agnus castus to lengthen my cycles (well LP really). Lp had been down to 8 days and I didn't like the every 3 weeks afs I was getting. Have taken agnus castus for 2 mths and LP went up to 12 days last month, and lots of EWM today (not had that for mths) (cd 14). Not that any of that matters of course but a bit of anecdotal support for those of you that may be consdering supplements.
At home today and dd1 is now ill Still, she's feeling better as I type and is coming along to toddler group at her request to help (nothing infectious) so silver linings and all that.
LOve to all xxx

Thanks for the anecdotal evidence, Deige, it really is good to know that some herbal supplements are indeed very powerful and do make a difference. It is also great that you no longer have to suffer periods every three weeks.

One of my friends has had a period for 5 weeks straight, poor thing. Her doctor has told her it is likely to be a symptom of perimenopause (I fucking hope not ) and has put her on progesterone tablets to stop the bleeding. But they've had to up the dose a couple of times because she's bleeding so much. I hope she'll see a gyneacologist soon to rule anything else out. Sounds a lot more likely to be fibroids IMO.

Yes, Deige, no matter how hard I try, I simply cannot refrain from testing. But it is a funny thing, I seem to get all hot and bothered around 7 DPO and test at 9DPO, but then I feel less compelled to test. I actually don't think I'll bother tomorrow and will see if AF turns up. UNLESS, of course I get more strong symptoms, then I MIGHT just have to test again before AF turns up. However, I really do doubt that the symptoms will pick up, already they are waning. Although when I got home from work I took my bra off cos my 's were sooo tender.

Tis a crazy old game, this ttc. I am trying not to take it too seriously, and won't be gutted. I am still feeling that everything will be alright whether a wee baby comes to me or not. I have always thought there was one more, but I realise that maybe this child will come to us in another way, perhaps I have to wait for grandchildren? I shall try to be philosophical about it.

greenlizard, have you got the results of the progesterone test? I'm dying to hear.

Tina, I hope all is well with you and the little ones.

Waves to diege...sorry to hear of more illness. Maybe you have had your fair share now and will have months of healthyness ahead lol. Its very probable that the opk was picking up on the hcg yes. I was getting a little ahead of myself I think. I was only confused a little as the hcg test was so faint and the opk and clearblue very positive. That would say to me that they are more sensitive to hcg than even the super sensitive hcg tests.
So this morning I attempted to go for a wonder in town to spend the vouchers my Mom gave me for Xmas.....hmmm. I drove there and drove straight round and back out again. I so hope I can manage work on Monday.

Littlepink, sorry it turned out to be a CP, but I hope you'll take heart that you did conceive, and I'm sure you will again.

JBrd, sorry that you now have flu, I hope you feel better soon. No wonder you were cross with your mum. Have you spoken to her about it? And what did you tell your friend?

Isabeller, what fantastic news about your embryos, fingers crossed they are continuing to do well, and your transfer goes ahead on Sunday as planned.

Tina, 2 girls, how lovely. I hope everything is ok following the leak and you can really begin to relax about your pregnancy now.

Zeuxippe, so sorry to read of your m/c. Please stay on the thread, you'll find lots of support here.

Calibee, are you feeling more positive about going back to work? Good luck for Monday anyway.

Sorry about the BFN gum, it sounded promising, but as you tested early, there's still hope. Your school holidays seems to have whizzed by, how many weeks did you have off? Green, how are you doing on your 2ww?

Blimey morien, how thoughtless of your SIL and the film. Do you think she did it on purpose, or she just didn't think? I get on well with my SIL mainly, but she can be quite insensitive some, not intentionally, she doesn't think it through. No wonder your relationship with yours was not improved by going on holiday with her.

Irish, good to see that your DDs surgery seems to have been a success. Diege, lovely to hear from you, there seems to be no end to the illness in your house, I hope DS2 has recovered from the vomiting, and DD2 not too hampered by her broken toe. You must be relieved DD3 recovering well from her op. Hopefully you've got all the ill health out of the way in January and everyone in your house will be super healthy for the rest of the year!

Welcome williamina - I'm sorry that the hospital thought it was appropriate to inform of your test results by letter when they'd obviously found something you weren't expecting. I hope you get the opportunity to go and discuss it person and make your displeasure known.

Welcome to mozarella as well, what a terribly difficult decision you had to make. I hope you are able to come to terms with it, and I wish you a BFP and healthy pregnancy soon.

Hi to Skylark too, at least 2 of my friends conceived while BFing, one carried on, til she was about 7 months pregnant, the other continued to feed all through, and then tandem fed for a while, so definitely possible.

Not much to report here. I've tried again to pre-book a doctor's appointment, but it's not possible at a convenient time. I was going to phone this morning but sorting school stuff was too busy, I had to go in and help out, but I'm definitely going on Monday morning. They do shared care at our surgery, so I do need to see a doctor first. Still no further discussion with DH. My friend at work who'd I'd normally talk to (and knows we were trying) is very anti-abortion, and as I would probably terminate for Down's (I feel bad just writing that), I don't feel I can talk to her. My other friend who I no longer work directly with as she's moved to a different part of the country, was around this week. She knows I need to talk to her, but several of us went out for a meal and I didn't get chance (I do have more than 2 friends BTW), but hope to catch up by phone.

I hope everyone has a lovely, restful weekend if you can

thanks for your concern lovely ladies all seems to be ok now and I haven't had any other leaks, I spoke to the maternity assesment unit yesterday and they said that normally if it was amniotic fluid it would carry on leaking, I had to wear a pad and check it again later in the day but it was dry thank goodness. Apparently the midwife said that amniotic fluid has a distinctive smell like sperm (sorry if tmi) - think I'm also starting to feel a little movement now, still not 100% sure but when I lay down I feel a few flutterings, can't wait to feel more!

calibee and gum sorry about the bfns, wish symptoms for af weren't sometimes so similar to a bfp its a cruel trick nature plays I think

this weekend I'm finishing painting the nursery and I've ordered two car seats today, blimey things are expensive, especially when you need two of some things, my dh is working all the hours god sends to try and get enough money together, furniture and pram are next on the list then all the little bits I was going to look for stuff on ebay but I'm finding myself wanting new stuff!

have a great weekend everyone!

On way back from clinic after embryo transfer. More news later xx

Yippee Isabeller and your new special cargo! Can't wait for further news. Take care now. xxxx

Tina so pleased your scare has passed and you are feeling a bit more relaxed. It must be really thrilling getting organised and buying stuff. Enjoy yourself!

ps. Sperm really does have a very distinctive smell (and not one I am that keen on to be honest

Sparkly I am not sure how your surgery works but mine is based around making it as difficult as possible to see a dr and certainly not before you have endured appalling customer service in that special brand of stroppy churlishness that seems to be found almost uniquely to the medical receptionist fraternity (or is it just in my surgery??)

We get what seems like 5 second window to ring in the morning to get an appointment or you can just turn up at 08:30 for spare appointments but the queue starts at around 07:30 so if you actually have a job or have children to care for it is virtually impossible.

I have found that going in an explaining I need an appointment and let them work it out. Drives them nuts but has worked out every time (so far they have managed to magic an appointment out of thin air).

Given your pregnancy you really must see your doctor, so why not try presenting yourself in person and see if it works for you?!

Actually, I must apologise for my outburst and derogatory statements about medical receptionists It's just that I called yesterday to get my day 21 progesterone test results and they told me to call back today between 2-2.30 as the gp hasn't read them yet...only to be told at 2 today to call back at 4. Called back at 4 to be told the Dr wasn't actually in today. WTF?! They then called me back to say actually she was but hadn't had a chance to have a look at them but they [medical receptionist] would ask her to call me if she got a chance but I would probably be better of calling next week. Agh!!! The ridiculousness of it is that I made an appointment to see her on Tuesday to discuss options in light of the test results once I had had a chance to discuss it with DP (whatever they may be)...if it carries on like this that will be when I get my results. grr

I wish I could offer my appointment to you sparkly.......

Ok so I may take some of that back!! The receptionist just called to say that my test was consistent with ovulation and when I asked what the number was she said 38. Does anyone know what that means?

I am going google it then bake a cake for DP to calm down. I am feeling quite irritable....(pms anyone!)

Tina Glad to hear that things have calmed down again! That must have been pretty scary... I can imagine that buying everything x2 gets expensive! I was at the expense for just the one back then! They do try and milk it...literally.

Welcome mozzarella No judging here, you are safe!

Welcome Skylark, hope you won't have to be here for long

Diege hope all the illness is on its way out!

CaliBee small steps, hun. I'm sure you'll be fine on Monday, try and take it easy if you can. Will you be able to offload things to others in the first couple of days? I have to admit that I did bugger all in the first week of being back at work, just catching up with paperwork etc. I was lucky I could do that, it worked quite well, especially with one of my colleagues being a star with helping out. (The problem is now that I still don't want to get back to the hard slog, but that's got nothing to do with the mc ).

I've told my friend about the mc - I would've done eventually, probably not via text message, but hey ho.
I've not spoken to my mum about it yet, I needed to cool down a bit first. Not sure I will say anything now... She meant no harm, she just doesn't seem to understand how her actions can affect others. But she is incredibly lonely since my dad died, and my sister pointed out to me, we need to be glad that she does communicate with others (even if not the right things...). My sister also rightly pointed out that this probably wasn't the only occasion where she has spread the 'happy news'...
I am always so torn about my mum - on one hand she drives me up the wall with her antiques, on the other I feel incredibly sorry for her, when she has so little and I have so much. And there is the ever increasing worry about her - she's not getting younger, and although she is well and fit and still capable of doing everything, more and more little things start happening that make me and my siblings worry. You know, when you start having the 'what are we going to do when...' sort of talks. I feel helpless and guilty towards her, and I then stupidly take it out on her . Parents, eh? Sigh... She's going to come to visit in March, and as usual I'm looking forward to and dreading it at the same time.

On a more positive note, my cold/flu is on its way out, and my bodily functions are starting to go back to normal, yay. No idea where I am in terms of a cycle, but I'm not worried about that. Doing OPks every day to check what's happening, but nothing yet. But I have been producing copious (we're talking need for panty liner here) amounts of watery, ewcm-like discharge (sorry TMI!) in the last couple of days, which I take as a good sign.
And DH and I have resumed the actions of the intimate kind, iykwim .

greenlizard Is your surgery my surgery?!? Because it sounds exactly like it - it's nigh on impossible to get a same day appointment, and the receptionists are abysmal. There have been so many complaints about them and the system, but it doesn't seem to improve, ever...

Isabeller how exciting to think you've got a little embryo on board, or is it more than one? Let us know how it went!
Glad things have settled down for you Tina ,there's nothing like that first fluttery feeling of a baby moving, is there!
greenlizard I think anything over 30 indicates you've ovulated but I'm sure the doctor will tell you more next week, it seems a frustrating system to negotiate to get an appointment.What type of cake did you bake.
JBrd good to hear everything's back on track in the intimacy department,sounds like you're gearing up to ovulation with that cm too!
I know what you mean about your mum, we're finding my MIL is very dependant on us since FIL died in November. She's not coping very well on her own, FIL used to drive her everywhere and take care of their affairs, so apart from missing him she's finding it difficult to manage. We've decided we're going to need to live with her, we're going to sell our house and build a self contained annexe for her in the garden of her house so we can look after her. We'll also need to get a 7 seater car to accomodate everyone(when I was hoping we'd need one for an extra child!). It's a funny situation to be in having the responsibility of an elderly person while looking after the needs of a growing family too, I think they call it the "sandwich generation". However DH is an only child so she's only got us, we want to do the right thing by her. I'm sure I could still juggle a baby too so it's not putting me off ttc!
Hope you manage to get an appointment sorted out soon Sparkly.
Diege ,another poorly child, hope everyone is well soon!
Welcome to the thread Skylark!

Really tired (this is me yawning). One good embryo was transferred and the others frozen, only two really strong enough to freeze but I decided I wanted to give the third one a chance, however small.

Side effects of meds still a bit troublesome and very poor sleep due to tail end of chesty cold but feeling reasonably well overall. Arrived to take over DP's mums care and encouraged to find google says bed rest is overrated.

DP is very confused one minute excited, the next convinced it won't work. Early night now, many many thanks for all the support, if I'm invisible for a few days it is just the care situation which can leave me with no time online. xx Is

Just popping into the snug to say hello to everyone. Big hugs to you all, especially the ladies who have been going through this rollercoaster of hope and pain - it is not an easy journey, but I have found the support here invaluable. Anyway, time has flown by, and little Finn is nearly two months old already!! He is wonderful, sweet, gorgeous and lovely - but in no way a replacement for my beautiful Mia. Gone for over 15 months now - horrible and more unbelievable every day.

I know I am incredibly fortunate to have conceived Finn naturally at the age of 42, but I am already thinking about ttc again, simply because of my age, but my doctor is saying that having now had two c-sections, I should wait at least a year as it takes a long time for the body to recover from such major surgery, and that I should be thinking about contraception instead. Not sure I really like this advice, but feel very selfish saying this so soon after having him.

Hi everyone. So much action on the thread while I sleep!

Very excited for you Isabeller, with your little embie on board. I hope you can catch up on some sleep now. Are you using progesterone? That will add to your tiredness.

Greenlizard, I think that progesterone level is good(anything over 30 is good). But in Australia it is measured differently, so I am sorry I can't be of more help.

Miaalexandersmummy - It is so nice to hear from you. I am glad little Finn is doing so well. I'll bet he is gorgeous? As for ttc again, it is a tough call after having a c-section, but it's difficult to wait when you are in your forties. My sister had 2 c-sections, but they were about 8 years apart, then accidentally fell pregnant when the baby was 4 months old. She had to have a third c-section. Everything was fine for baby and mum.

Tina, I am glad to hear all is well. It must be so nice to be choosing things for your new babies, it is all part of the excitement.

Sparkly ( and Greenlizard and Jbrd), I can't believe your Drs surgery. If that happened in Australia I'd change my doctor. But you can't really pick and choose in the UK can you? We actually have a family GP, who works with three others, so if the kids are ever sick I can see one of the four, but I also have my own doctor, who works in a surgery of about 12 doctors, so there's always someone to see. Then there are hundreds more in the city who I could go to if I can't get into mine. I think it is really important that you get a scan done, particularly in light of what you said about terminating if there's downs. You need to have the 12 week scan to be able to decide whether or not to have an amnio, or will you have an amnio anyway? Will you have to go for a private scan? And I am amazed that your DH is still not talking about this.

Greenlizard, did you test again this morning? ( I suppose you haven't had another morning yet?) I no longer feel pregnant, so I won't test unless I suddenly feel pregnant again.

Off to the hairdressers again today, this time for my two daughters. They want nicely cut and straightened hair for school on Monday (they both have a big head of curls like me). Mine was straightened on Wednesday, and I've had tonnes of compliments at work. It will be springing back to its curly self as soon as it gets a lick of moisture! And it's a gorgeous day, so I think I'll go to the beach later on.

Someone mentioned that our summer break seemed short? I think in the UK and Europe you have a much longer break than us. Ours is about 6 weeks, but we have four terms in the school year, and another 6 weeks holiday spread throughout the year. Which is good, as we need to recharge after 10 weeks of teaching. It felt like I hadn't been away. All the usual politics etc are still there, but this year I want to be more relaxed about it all. I sometimes get a bit hot-headed about the injustices in our workplace, but it doesn't get me anywhere. I need to focus on the fact that I really do enjoy most of my colleagues and most of the students, and at the end of the day, I love what the money brigs to me and my family. If it wasn't for my job we certainly wouldn't live right next to a gorgeous beach or be able to take our family on a lovely holiday in July. We have finished booking the different villas,flights etc we need for it and I know it will be a really special time.

We had some professional learning yesterday (the kids don't start til Monday) and it was about our own well-being and happiness. It was worthwhile. We talked about having gratitude, and I know I have so much to be grateful for. So despite feeling a bit sad about not being pregnant this month, I still feel I have much to be happy about, and I did get lucky and have one golden egg in my forties,and he is a gorgeous, suffocating affectionate, loving little boy. Another golden egg would have been a big bonus, but I am starting to accept that there's only a tiny chance for me.

If you got to the end of this essay you deserve a , , and a !

I enjoyed your your essay Gum . I have a picture in my mind of sun-filled days, popping to the beach as the fancy takes you. YOu are indeed right about the need for gratitude, and also enjoying the small day to day things sometimes reinforces that gratitude I think. Are you still temping this month and what cd are you on now? Ok, so there's the small things and all that but a bit of obsessive longing thrown in for good measure doesn't do any harm
Miaalexandrasmum on the section front, the rules are very different in the 2 Health Authorities across our region. One (mine) says that as long as you don't have a 'classic' incision (vertical) then no reason to wait at all after giving birth. The other advises a wait of 4 mths. The 12 mths wait according to my consultant (who I asked after my section with ds1) said 12 mths wait (which I had googled as still advisable by some) harped back to the 'old days') He said even if you had had a classical incision say 3 mths previous to bfp this would just mean they'd advise a section for that baby. I certainly wouldn't wait the 12 mths. I did start ttc-ing a few mths after ds1 and got pregnant 9 mths later and had a successful vbac.
Isabeller how exciting for you! But also very stressful too I'd imagine. MY sister had ivf 3 times and always said she felt best totally chilling for the first 5 days or so but then it was down to trying to manage the stress after that. Different for everyone I suppose. Everything crossed for you xxx
Tina excellent news about the fluid resolving itself. Did they do an exam to check for thrush? Dr Google also says if it's amniotic fluid it will be like a dripping tap, not really stopping, so hoping you're feeling reassured now x
Waves to Irish, Jbrd and everyone else I know I've forgotten

Deige, I think you may know me too well. Despite saying I'd put my thermometer away, I actually got it out again after ovulation. According to fertility friend I am 10 DPO, but I think I may be 9 DPO. Either way, I still have to wait til Tuesday or Wednesday for AF, which seems ages away. I fully expect to see the RTD as I don't have the symptoms I had earlier, apart from tender breasts, which I have every cycle before my period. Oh, and my temps are still up, after a dip two days ago, but they usually stay up until about 12 DPO.

My DH and I were discussing what we'd do if we won the lottery (might actually have to buy a ticket!).His list was all about paying the mortgage, buying a boat, travelling etc. I told him I'd spend some on adopting a child from China or Africa. He reckoned we wouldn't be able to adopt because of our age (too old). I said, if that didn't work I'd go for IVF with donor eggs. He said, "but you are too old to have a baby". I said, "with donor eggs I could". He was genuinely surprised. He really believes my body is too old to bear children. I explained that it is my eggs, not my body. Anyway, he said,"so, it isn't about adopting and helping a child etc, it is about you". I told him I still felt I had much to give a child. He said,just give it to the kids you have,and wait for grandchildren...

It is so hard for me to understand his viewpoint, though I do get it. It makes sense, but I see another child as bringing more of all the good stuff into our lives, where he just wants to move on.

It is hard for me to reconcile this, as he had the same attitude before we had our last child but now (despite a few glitches over the summer break)they have a lovely time together and I can see that DS gives DH much joy.

Of course he has the right to feel as he does, but it seems there is no real compromise. He clearly thinks I am too ancient to have a babyAnd he is probably mostly right.

I still don't know what I'll do next cycle, whether I'll try to avoid SWI or not. It's a tough one.

2ww update - 11DPO and I have the following:

Temps which have stayed high (36.77)
Yellowy CM
Cramping in my lower back.
Stabbing twinges in uterus area and what feels like a stitch
Boobs that feel bigger (but nipples are back to normal)
Still windy
A brace of pimples (spots and wrinkles - brilliant! Best of both worlds then....)
I am being a very grumpy madam
I feel like I am about to get thrush
Oh and another flipping BFN.....

Ps. Irish I made a carrot cake which cheered me up because I love to bake and DP and his son enthusiastically eat whatever I dish up. I am just learning how to bake really (thank you Mary Berry and the Great British Bake Off!) so their enthusiasm is appreciated. SD is a little more circumspect about my baking but she loves my lasagne so that's alright