Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

That's a good question. Either way the temp is great. I would normally say to go for the first temperature. Did you actually get out of bed at 5.20? You should always take your temperature when you first wake up, and if you get up,say to go to the loo, the next temp won't be valid unless you've slept for three hours.

Either way, they are good temps!It could be implantation (in which case you'll get a BFP in a couple of days), or a nice high temp indicating a nice level of progesterone.

And a BFN at this stage means nothing - 9dpo is very early!

Having read that you've tested I feel very tempted to go ahead and test RIGHT NOW on the evening of 8 DPO(but I might only be 7 DPO). But that would be a bit MAD I should think.

Your nipples standing to attention sounds very promising. I'm still having some wierd fluttery feelings in my lower abdomen. Most likely wind as I am very bloated.

Time will tell...

littlepink Aww, that is rubbish, so so sorry. Mother Nature can be so cruel sometimes Really hope you get lots of hugs and support in RL, and we're here for you.

Morien Gosh, your SIL sounds awful! It's awful when you are being let down by someone you thought you could trust.

Gum and greenlizard Watching this space with interest! But I hope you can refrain from testing too early, it is so crushing... Having said that, I got a BFN after being 3 days late last time, before the BFP after another 2 more days. Who knows?!? at the windy swimming, green

Still at home today, feeling marginally better, but shattered. And I am really cross with my mum - I got a text from a friend yesterday, asking about how 'a little bird' told her I was pregnant and if it was true?! The only way she could've heard about it was from my mum telling her mum - but that must have happened at Christmas, because that's when we told everyone and before it all went pear-shaped. But the whole mc was already going on then, with its going back and fro, everything hanging in the air and by no means all good at any time. I was bleeding like a pig, ffs, and my mum knew that! I'm astounded that my mum goes and starts blabbing it out. Fine if it was close family, but it wasn't. Grrrrrr The problem is that when I tell her off, she won't get it She's increasingly oblivious about other people's feeling and opinions, it's quite disconcerting sometimes.

Sorry about the rant!

Hey Jbrd I would be cross too. What did you say to the friend?? Glad you're feeling a bit better this morning. I seem to be nursing a three day headache which is not being touched by the strongest painkillers raa.
gum and lizard I agree about the testing too early....having said that I know I couldnt resist. I think I got my first very very faint positive at 9dpo...although I couldnt say it was a definate positive until 12dpo. I will resist ever doing that again (she says ) as by the time I had my first scan at 6+3 I felt like I had been pregnant for eons.

Hi everyone

I came on this thread a couple of weeks ago, then got a bfp and didn't announce it as it felt a bit unfair of me to get one straight away after some people on here have been trying for so long. Anyway I started to miscarry on Monday this week, 2 days after my 40th birthday. So very sad.

Anyway hoping to ttc again in the not too distant future when feeling up to it. Can i come back to the thread?

littlepink so sorry - it sounds as if we have had similar experiences.

Good luck to those hoping to test soon

Oh zeuxippe so sorry to hear that...you're not alone .How are you doing now??
There is no need to leave for now...I found the ladies on here so supportive to me whilst going through a miscarriage over the last few weeks.

Zeuxippe so sorry to hear that! No need to leave, there is lots of support here! You're not alone, quite a few of us have had the same experience, some of us very very recently.
I never really left this thread after having my bfp and everyone was so supportive and helpful when I had my mc a couple of weeks ago.

It is an awful awful thing to happen, take good care of yourself.

Thank you CaliBee and JBrd. It is just very sad. I was only 6 weeks pregnant.

All over the place emotionally, initially I was torn between thinking tthat things might still be ok and being sure they weren't. Now I know they aren't and mostly just feel numb.

Just trying to hold onto the hope that there will be a baby one day.

"Just trying to hold onto the hope that there will be a baby one day"

oh I know that feeling. Cant deny that I'm wavering now as to weather it will happen for me. Its hard to be positive when time moves so quickly isnt it?

Hello zeuxippe, really sorry you're had to come and join us, but welcome. It's hard, isn't it? Lots of comfort here though.

jbrd, understand your frustration with your mum. Mine, wonderful as she is in other ways, just as I'm sure yours is, has always been a bit like that, and it's just getting worse as she gets older. I can't offer any advice, but I sympathise.

greenlizard did the gas propulsion at least make you swim faster ? Fingers crossed that your symptoms are the real thing - yours too, gum!

As for me, I've now lost track completely of what day it is CD I'm on so I haven't a clue when AF is due (last time I started just after greenlizard I think). Anyway, we've DTD pretty much EOD (spontaneously) for the last 2 weeks so I don't think I could have done any better even if I did have an eye on the dates. No symptoms.

Since you're all suitably aghast at my SIL's insensitivity, I'll share another little gem. On holiday she kept going on about a film she'd just seen, and I mean going on - she kept coming back all week to how wonderful it was, she wouldn't tell us what it was about so as not to spoil it but we absolutely had to see it. So a few weeks later when said film became available on our on-demand service we rushed to watch it. It's a French film called Le Prénom - in hindsight the title should have rung alarm bells but 'the name' could mean anything - and it's all about a couple and 2 friends having dinner together, announcing a pregnancy and choosing the unborn baby's name . From a few minutes in I could feel DP looking at me (from about the point where the father says, 'we had the scan today - the good news is it's a boy. The bad news is he's dead in the womb'. It was a joke ), but I decided to ignore him and stick it out for a while because I didn't want to believe my SIL could be that crassly insensitive...but after about 20 mins DP switched it off and I burst into tears - as much because she could be so unfeeling as anything else. WTF???
Anyway, ladies, the moral is: French film, Le Prénom...avoid.

morien absolutely WTF?? What a silly cow she sounds. Its almost spiteful...beyond insensitive. Gah!!!
Big hugs...

Geeze, Morien, that is un-bloody-believable. Your SIL is an insensitive callous cow.

Zeuxippe, I am so sorry your happy news didn't last. Having a baby in our forties really can be a tough road, but so worthwhile in the end. Please stay on our thread, it really is very supportive.

What everyone says about testing early is so true, but I just can't seem to hold on...I'm going to personally challenge myself, and see if I can not test tomorrow morning

gum I just found myself physically wringing my hands with you as I read your post.lol.
I'm bored this morning...I have a man in fitting a loft ladder. He's taken over the upstairs and I desperately need a wee. wishes man would hurry up and leave me in peace.

pink so sorry about your news and don't feel stupid, I had a chemical a couple of years ago, you've no reason to suppose an mc would happen

green yes dh is thinking of converting the garage to a man cave lol he's outnumbered 4 to 1 but is very happy about that!

had another scare this morning as I started leaking fluid (not wee sorry tmi) and got convinced it was amniotic fluid as there was a fair amount. Just monitoring it now and have to phone the assesment unit back at two but so far I haven't leaked anymore, seems just when I start relaxing some new scary thing happens!

Sorry not to name check, but just wanted to reassure Tina. I'm not sure if you all remember but I had a huge gush of fluid at 22 weeks with ds2 that soaked through my jeans when I was waiting for the train home (to mid thigh). I was very very worried but it turned out to be thrush would you beleive and is apparently very common for this watery discharge in pregnancy. I was so sure it was amniotic fluid becuase of the gush (very watery indeed) but after an examination they confirmed that it wasn;t and it never happened again. Keep strong and I'm sure everything will turn out well xx

tina...you must be so worried. Lets hope its something similar to diege's experience.

hello ladies, joining this thread after very difficult months..
I have a beautiful girl who is now 18 months, felt pregnant again but unfortunately pregnancy ended with a TFMR at 24 weeks.. It was an heartbreaking decision and I'm afraid it was the wrong one..I'm still feeling very guilty and can't cope with what happened.. It's 5 months now.. I hope not to upset anybody here. I'm really scared but we're finally ttc again. I will be 41 in april so I'm afraid odds are not on my side.. and I also think I don't deserve it..

Welcome mozzarellamummy first of all I'm so sorry to hear about the awful time you have been through... nobody will judge you on here, and if its any consolation I know I would have done the same. I have never had to go through such a horrible experience but can only begin to imagine how horrid it must have been for you.
I hope you find some support on here. I think at 41 you will probably be seen as a relative pup..

Hello mozzarellamummy I have a grown up DD and now in later life ttc via IVF. So many parents have to make heart wrenching decisions about what to do in the best interests of their loved children or potential children. I'm sure you would not judge someone who had had to decide to turn off life support for a child but would feel nothing but compassion.

Years ago I read something in 'Man's search for meaning' (Viktor Frankel) where a holocaust survivor was devastated in old age to lose his wife. The therapist said the meaning of your pain is that it is the price you are paying for saving her the pain of being the one left alone behind.

I'm sure you took your decision in order to spare others pain xx

Thank you Isabeller and Calibee.. even if still struggling with what happened I want to try to move on (never forgetting this baby of course, it's simply impossible anyway).. I just hope I won't have to face something like that again.. I'm just happy not to be alone and wish good luck to every body here!

Hello mozzarellamummy, and welcome. I'm sorry to hear what you've been through, that must have been such an agonising decision to make. As CaliBee says, nobody here will judge you, and you'll get lots of support and willing listeners if you want to talk about it - so come and take refuge from the world outside.

Littlepink. Sorry for your loss. I really feel for you. Mozzarellamommy. I second what the others have said.

I've just joined the post but hope you don't mind a wee rant. I had been to women's unit at hospital for recurrent miscarriage investigations. I had expected to be invited in to receive results in person but instead got a letter in the post.

Letter says that all fine with uterus, bloods, hormones etc. but that I have polycystic ovaries but that shouldn't have impacted on the miscarriages!

Um what? Had no idea. Never been diagnosed. Regular periods. Had no idea about polycystic as no symptoms! But clearly while pcos is not the reason for mcs it does dramatically impact on my fertility.

Im very cross as i poured heart out to doctor doing the tests, he knows how old I am and my worries about fertility. You'd think he could give me this crappy news in person. It's like going in for a pain in your leg and receiving a letter saying 'your leg is fine but by the way your foot is broken.' AIBU?

Ladies can any of you help me out here??
I did another pregnancy test today (8 days post mc) and it was almost negative. Line so faint you had to look twice to see it. However the opk (dont even know why I did it...obsessed with poas I guess) was quite positive...even the clearblue digi had a smiley face. If the opk was still picking up the hormone from pregnancy that would surely make it more sensitive than the super sensitive pregnancy tests...am I going nuts here?? I would be surprised if it was ovulation but who knows...what do you think?

Hi mozzarellamummy I am so sorry to hear your sad and difficult story. My heart goes out to you. You are most welcome to come and hang out here for a while - the ladies are fabulous, wise and very supportive.

Is it only hopeful and I on the 2WW? I think I should rename myself the guffalo as my wind affliction shows no sign of abating - it really is enough to make my own eyes water

Apart for that and my standing to attention nipples, I feel that I may have to consider that AF is on her way....I had a slight trace of pink in my CM this afternoon, some twinging in my uterus which I get before AF, some backache and constipation (see above!), am very bloated with a rather fetching spot emerging on the end of my nose. Add all that to the drop in my temperature this morning - I suspect this is not going to be my month but hey the fat lady hasn't sung yet........

calibee sorry can't help you with your question but hope someone can help. I am not really sure how the tests work.

greenlizard ,could it be implantation dip and implantation bleed? Just wondering!
It's cruel quirk of nature that a lot of signs of impending AF are similar to early pregnancy, cramps, bloating etc...keeps us guessing!
CaliBee I don't really know why you would get that reading on an opk stick but I know I ovulated on d 14 after my miscarriage at 6 weeks and d 23 after my one at 12 weeks. After the one at 11 weeks I wasn't charting but it was 35 days before AF arrived. 8d post miscarriage would seem early for ovulation. Would you consider temping, it might give you a better idea as to when your cycle is getting back on track?
williamina YANBU . The medical profession don't seem very interested in fertility issues in the over 40s! I thought after three consecutive miscarriages last year I would get some investigation but when my GP enquired on my behalf I was told I wouldn't be entitled. Because of my age any pregnancy would have a 50% chance of miscarriage anyway and because DH and I have three healthy children together already it rules out a lot of genetic problems they may test for. I was just told if I wanted to try again to take aspirin next time.(I wish that had been suggested after MC2,I'll always wonder if it may have prevented MC3).
I got my AMH levels checked privately and when I requested progesterone levels to be checked my GP did arrange it for me but I just got the receptionist phoning with results to say they indicated I was ovulating normally, no follow up was offered.
I would think if you have pcos you should be entitled to discuss it with your doctor, you shouldn't feel you've got to keep pushing for help!
Welcome to the thread Mozzarella, it must have been such a difficult decision for you to make, you have my sympathy.
Zeuxippe sorry to hear your news x
Morien I can't believe your SIL! Has she always been so nasty to you?
Tina my colleague at work who was pregnant the same time as me last year had a similar experience with leaking fluid at about the same stage of pregnancy you are now and went to term and had a healthy baby girl, you must be worried but I hope it all settles down for you.