Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

Thank you everyone for your kindness about DPMums fall. She did not break anything but with vascular dementia I can't think a blow to the head is great news.

Hi Stephenie

I am really tired but wanted to update re GP visit. I am being referred for an urgent scan ie within 2 weeks then will almost certainly have an op to remove the lump. I am really hoping it will turn out to be a harmless cyst and be gone soon enough to have no effect on the timing of our planned frozen cycle.

to all xx

Hi ladies, hope you're all hanging in there. Sorry to hear about your mil's fall Is. Good to hear they're getting on top of the lump (so to speak).

Wotcha Stephanie and welcome to the thread. I truly think this is the nicest ttc thread on mn.

Big temp drop for me too this morning Gum but didn't manage 3 hours solid sleep prior to taking it as I had a really restless night. I assume this buggers up the temps, yes? Glad to hear about the pay rise...knock yerself out at the charity shops

Remnant so sorry to hear things are so hard for you. I hope you manage to get things sorted soon. You're in my thoughts.

I'm guessing DP made it home Cali as you're all quiet

Diege hope you manage to raise your head out of the bog long enough to see me wave at you. Feel better soon kid. I know it's ghastly, but I'm truly envious all the same.

Notsoold I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a good outcome for you love.

Sparkly I can't believe your Husband is still behaving like a massively spoilt child, and am totally impressed at how you are still living with him, cos DP or not...if MY DP behaved like that towards me while I was carrying his child (planned or not) he would not be sharing my house. What he's doing is causing emotional and psychological cruelty to a pregnant woman. It's unnacceptable honey. Really it is. You need to start protecting yourself from this negativity or how are you going to feel about this child when it arrives? I worry for you...

Congratulations on the getting married bit Morien, sounds like you have a nice day in mind.

Sorry to all those I've missed...

Morning all! Sorry to hear about the temp drop gum . I have a hunch that sperm is meeting egg but that things then don't progress.I really do think you'll be successful in the end, esp as you have reg cycles xx Enjoy your weekend, it does sound fun!
drwhofan what cd are you on? Yes, disrupted sleep will mess with your cycle and probably best to discard this temp if you are using ff. How are things with you?
remnant have been thinking of you and hope things are ok x Same notsoold; what day is your follow-up scan on?
calibee hope dp is with you as I type,or if not, on his way over!
Welcome *stephanie! - agree that you have indeed pocked a very friendly ttc thread here
green how are the temps today?
issy good that they are dealing with the lump - I'm pretty sure a cycst is the most obvious diagnosis. Are you having keyhole?
sparklyphew,not sure how I'd cope with that text tbh...does he has even an inkling of how miserable you might be feeling as a result of his behaviour?
Hi GG! All going along fine thanks - sickness bad but I do get some respite for an hr or 2 around midday,so that does seem to make it more bearable. How are things with you?
Hi morien, how are things?
Well I'm off to meet a friend for lunch today,and will have ds2 (17mth) with me - makes it a bit harder but will be nice for him to get a day out. Dh has taken the others to get ds1's hari cut at the barbers (he needs to go mob handed to hold ds1 down ).
Hope everyone has a good weekend and sorry for missing out anyone - it's never intentional!

Morning everyone?.
Isabeller glad you are getting the lump seen to and that it doesn?t interfere with your frozen cycle. Fingers crossed it goes smoothly and will be a weight of your mind.

Poor Diege feeling so sick (though a bit as well) I am a wee bit hungover this morning so you have my sympathy (even though is self-inflicted and not very TTC ? I had a really fun night out with the girls ? even went dancing !) I had to laugh at DS hair cutting issues - my nephew is one and his hair is all patchy as every time my sister tries to trim a bit he moves - looks like a right state!

Thinking of you notsoold and remanat. Hope you are ok.
hopeful good news on the payrise. It is lovely to have a windfall and that it can ease the burden burden by paying of the old plastic is great?.enjoy your shopping! Sorry to hear about your temperature drop. Feel bad for you.

drwhofan and hopeful think we are all cycle buddies. My temps have stayed unusually high for me but fear that AF is lurking around the corner. I POAS again this morning and I tell you I have never seen a more sparkly white stick ? not a hint of anything and no amount of squinting changed it. I am 12DPO, have some spots starting on my chin and twinges in my uterus?all of which I recognise as impending doom! I predict lower temps tomorrow and Monday with AF due on Tuesday. I am by nature a very resilient and positive person but it does upset me that each month I really, really hope I will get by bfp but have to accept that it might not happen for us au naturel or at all . I feel sad if I am honest

Anyway, my action plan for next months is try CQ10 and DHEA and EPO for egg/CM improvement, some extra B vitamins on top of my pre-natal (from Boots ? thanks for the tip calibee - way cheaper!) and we have appointment at the fertility clinic later this month where I will be having a transvaginal scan done (sounds fun!) to see about what else we might do. Oh and obviously have a lot of perfectly timed sex guided by my CBFM which will have magically sorted itself out and actually give me some other than highs . Other than that, I am going back to acupuncture lady and focussing much more on my fitness and having a smashing time in Bermuda. I am signed up for another 10k run in May so I need to pull my finger out and get back to doing some running. Off to buy a reflective running jacket so I don?t get mowed down running in the dark?.

sparkly I really worry about you and the stress that your DP?s behaviour is putting you under. I find his behaviour really perplexing?do you know what his issue is exactly? His behaviour sounds very controlling and intentionally damaging by deliberately withdrawing his support and affection when you at your most vulnerable. It sounds like he is doing it on purpose to punish you? I assume that this is unusual behaviour for him; I don?t know how you put up with it but guess you are holding out for his attitude to change? I so hope you are managing ok and really glad your friend is around to help ? I hope you let her! Take care.

This afternoon, i am going to bake a big fat over the top chocolate cake for all the DSC's as they are having friends over for tea.

Greenlizard that choccie cake sounds delicious. Sorry about the Feckin' BFN.

I had a huge slice of the most moist delicious flourless hazelnut chocolate cake this morning at the cafe with my little sister. I am trying to console myself over the lack of a bfp Had loads of luck at the thrift store,so I've nothing to whinge about.

Deige, I fluctuate from feeling sure that I will eventually hit the golden egg, and feeling completely without hope then wondering why on earth I'd be so foolish to think that I will cheat the stats and be one of the lucky few who have a baby after turning 45.

As I've said before,I don't feel that walking away from ttc is something I can do, so I will press on.

Green -I like your plan of action. I am considering giving up caffeine. This last week I have strayed away from my normal healthy eating. I have demolished a banana loaf with lashings of butter, eaten chocolate after weeks of abstaining, have eaten toast (despite being grain free) and also eaten cream,cheese and butter despite being dairy free

So tomorrow I'll step right back onto that wagon and treat my body like the temple of baby-making it should be.

I am really interested in a thing called the "healthy baby code" that one of the experts in the Paleo community has written ( Kesser ) I have heard from others who were having trouble conceiving that it helped them. The only problem is that it costs $197! And I don't really have it spare. And if I put that on the credit card my DH would not be pleased...

Well, I must dash, dinner is ready.

All the best to everyone...

Hi ladies. Would u mind me asking a question. I started clomid & they said for me to start on the 3rd day of period & count day 1 on the day the period has fully started. My question is, I started lightly on the 31st of jan. Do I count this day as my actuall period started?. Do I say I'm on cd31?. I'm jst wondering when the best time to test. Thanx ladies & have a nice day. X

Hi Diege, I'm cd13. Like greenlizard I poas this morning and it was like the "you're not bloody pregnant, you twat" line was thicker, and pinker than usual...arse! . I'm taking vitamins til I rattle and almost gag at the thought of shoving them down my throat. We eat healthily, we have sex at the right time, cos I know exactly when I ovulate each month, and my temps on ff bear this out, and yet...still not bloody upduffed! Yes, I'm overweight, but it's clear that my cycle is textbook and working as well as can be expected, especially as I'm an old bird.

Hi Mazzie sorry, can't help you on the Clomid question as I've never taken it, but I expect someone more knowledgeable will come along soon.

Wow, this really is a nice place to be, everybody is so kind and sweet and supportive. Thanks to notsoold, Morien, hopefulglum, DoctorWhoFan, and Isabeller* for making me feel so welcome. There is so much info on here about so many different people it's hard to keep up and remember who's doing what and what's happening to who!!!!! Thought I might have made some sort of 'faux par' yesterday when it went quiet!!! lol
Hopefully there will be lots of good news story's to read on here and keep mine and everybody's spirits up in the coming months, i'm off into town now to stock up on pregnancy tests!!!!!!!! I'm hoping i'll be able to use one of them in a few days time, stopped smoking recently and have never felt such strong ovulation cramping before, absolutely convinced we managed to get it bang on ovulation this month and plus the every 2 days before!!!
Hope everybody has a good day. (smile)

Hmmmmmm, was trying to make a smiley face at the end but don't know how to do one!!!! Thought I had to type the word smile in brackets?....... No?! Lol

Hi Stephanie and welcome! You are right about this being nice and supportive thread...you can say things here that you wouldn't really want to in real life (well I haven't tried to talk about the state of my CM but I am not sure they would be too thrilled )

Well done on the giving up smoking - I haven't smoked for 2.5 years and can honestly say that giving up has been the best thing I have ever done. I feel so much better for it but strangely didn't notice having any extra money! Your timing sounds hopeful so fingers crossed your joining this thread is a short on . I guess you are in the two week wait now? Do you take your temperature too?

I am terrible for testing so have been buying OPK's and pregnancy tests from Amazon - cheap as chips and I can pee away to my hearts content

PS. Your brackets have to be of the square variety [] to make your emmoticon show up in your message..

Hi greenlizard I don't take my temperature, i'm not a particularly organized person so remembering to take my conception tablet every day is a bit of a struggle sometimes let alone chart temperature everyday, i think i've been pretty spot on with the ovulation cramps and cm but maybe not, this month i was 99.9 percent certain though as i said before. I have a chemist near me that sells hpt's at 3 for £1 which is an absolute bargain, worked for me last time so assuming they work just as well the ridiculously expensive ones, good job they are cheap because i tend to test even when I know it will be negative but you know how it is.................... you never know?!!!!!! I'm actually cramping slightly at the moment with occasional ovary twinges and af is due on Monday if my ovulation day was as i thought, isn't mother nature cruel to make implantation symptoms the same as period cramps and early pregnancy symptoms the same as pre period symptoms!!! Hopefully that emoticon will work!

Do you have any children already? What bought you to this thread?

No biological children of my own (so far I should say in a vain attempt of positive mental attitude affecting my future chances !! I am 43 (as is DP) he has two children form a previous relationship so I have two DSC (which was all a bit/is still a learning curve for me..... Been trying for about 6 months now without a hint of a bfp to show for it. Had all the blood tests done etc and all seems to be in working order so off for a consultation at a fertility clinic to see if there is anything else we can do...

There are a few of us who are the same stage in our cycles drwhofan and hopefulgum and myself are all at CD12/13 at the moment so we are pretty aligned to you so we can all endure share the trials and hopefully tribulations of TTC together. Apart from a couple of friends and my sister, I haven't' told anyone about us TTC so it's great to come on this thread and share with people who understand it.

Not used to the lingo yet greenlizard, what is CD12/13?

Also, how do you feel and people generally feel about the occasional glass of alcohol? I have given up drinking my glass or 2 of wine every night!!! Still feek i need a glass of Baileys every now and then though, just to relax and not completely deprive myself of everything I used to enjoy!!!

I know it takes a while to get used to all the acronyms etc. I have found being on here very educational!

CD = Cycle Day with CD1 being the first day of your period (AF or Auntie Flo) (proper flow not spotting). Once you have established when you ovulated you will see people use DPO = Days passed ovulation.

The theory is that we can ovulate at different times each month (I certainly do) but that your luteal phase (or LP) (from date of ovulation to day you period starts) generally stays the same, so I have a luteal phase of 14 and I ovulated on CD12 so I am due in two days time which will be 14DPO and CD26.

Re alcohol TTC I think it's best to keep it to a "reasonable" amount. Given the length of time it might take to conceive I think you need to take a balanced approach (I say this as I went out and drank a few last night!) but generally I will have one glass when I am out or none at all.

Hi everyone! Back home since yesterday, catching up properly with MN - although only briefly, have to pop out to Morrisons and get light bulbs in a minute.

Welcome stephenie you've come to the right place! Like others have said, the ladies here are lovely, and sooo knowledgeable! Sorry to hear about your mc, it is such an emotional rollercoaster...Many of us have been there, including me, so you are in good company!

isabeller I know it's easier said than done, but I hope you can manage to not stress too much about the biopsie... In any case, it's better to know what you are dealing with. When will you know when they'll do it? Fingers crossed it's nothing to worry about!

Sorry to hear about the BFNs, ladies! I'm now going to join again in the life dominated by 2-week intervals. CD14 here today, got a positive on the OPK today, Cbfm is reading High, and I have lots of watery/ewcm. Hence the BD has started
I have to say, I'm getting less and less enthusiastic about the swi - have to be careful it's not turning into a chore! Well, it probably already has... And I don't like it. Really tired today, but I know I need to muster some energy in a while. Ugh.

Plus, my mum is visiting. Which is nice, but... She's hard work, and I get so impatient with her! Plus, the timing is really bad - I've just heard back from this job I've applied to earlier in the week - they want to progress to the next level, which is an assessment that I need to complete by the 10th. And let me tell you, it's no mean feat! A 3-part test that will definitely require quite a bit of work! So my mum will have to do some babysitting while she's here (not ideal), and I will have to cram some work in in the evenings instead of being on MN Ah well, I'm not complaining, would love to get that job!

Oh, and meant to ask - why am I getting a positive OPK, but only a High on the Cbfm? I would've expected them to 'agree' with each other, or is that not how it works?

I have a question....................... Do you ladies get insane baby / pregnancy envy? I googled it the other day after getting not much sympathy from DF after finding out about yet another pregnancy (number 6 in 2 months). Apparently it is a real thing that us women get but some more than others. Last year a bunch of my old school friends who are the same age as me had babies as well as 3 other friends, my little sister announced she was pregnant just before christmas (I always thought I would be the child that gave my dad his first grandchild as none of my brothers or sisters ever wanted children!!!) she is now 21 weeks and I am very happy for her but still feeling stupidly jealous, both of our friends who live in the 2 flats above us are now over 14 weeks pregnant and 3 girls at work in the last 2 weeks have announced a pregnancy - one of them who was only telling me the other day that she didn't want children!!!!!!!!! Sorry for ranting on again but it's nice to find somewhere to be able to rant without being judged or made to feel silly.

To all the other ladies on here, i'm fairly new at all this so please don't think i'm ignoring you but I don't have enough experience at the moment to be giving out advice, hopefully i will learn a lot and will be able to join in properly soon. Already getting the hang of the abbreviations and the emoticons

mazzie, if you started AF, lightly, rather than spotting, then I'd call that CD 1. I think in the would of assisted conception the flow has to start no later than 2 or 3 pm to be counted as day 1.

So you took the clomid? Did you have any side-effects?

You would be day 31. How long is your Luteal phase (Days post ovulation, when AF starts)? Depending on which day you ovulated, how long your luteal phase is, that will determine when AF is due,and whether you are late. But by now I would definitely test. But I am a serial POAS person

Let us know how you get on.

My temp is still not below cover line. I am 13 DPO. It usually drops around 12 DPO, but although it isn't below cover line, it is certainly not nice and high as you'd expect if pregnant. I am having some familiar cramps, so I reckon AF isn't far away.

I am going to do a bit of research about "the healthy baby code" and will let you know what I find out.

Jbrd, I would definitely trust your opk. I think the CBFM tests estrogen and LH. But because it is reading it in the morning, that may be why you are getting highs but not peaks? I am not an expert, but I am guessing that may be why. Perhaps the peak will come the day after your positive opk?

I did read a study that suggested by the time you get the "peak", the optimum time has passed. which has me thinking I ought to invest in some opk's because I don't have any at the moment. Or I will just do the every second day shagging thing from about day 6?

I am amazed that my DH hasn't noticed a pattern to our shagging. But he is a man I suppose... I don't think we've had sex since the last lot of SWI. I have been so tired every night and he hasn't even tried to put a move on me - probably because I'm asleep on the couch every night at 8pm. SO sexy, 'eh??? I am going to have to lift my game somehow if we are ever going to conceive this kid. I need an injection of libido...

Right, off to do some research...

Stephanie - I used to get baby & pregnancy envy really badly. But I've been ttc for so long now that I don't get it nearly as badly. It requires far too much emotional energy. I also have come to realise that many of the women who get pregnant (particular the ones I don't know very well) may have had to go through hell to get where they are,and perhaps one day, I'll be the lucky one with the baby bump and someone else will be envying me.

It is hard to have the thing you most want flaunted in front of you all the time, but just try and think of it as an opportunity for some babydust to rub off on you.

I keep wanting to rub pregnant women's bellies, (though I never would) as in some cultures it is considered helpful when ttc. Apparently it is also good to have close association with a baby. I don't know any little babies at the moment, the youngest one I know is 2.

It will be lovely for you when your sister's baby arrives. Hopefully by then you will have your own baby growing inside you.

Thank you hopeful. My very light period started about 5pm on the 31 jan. I started clomid on the 3rd Feb till the 7th. I ov on the 14th. I have no idea about Lp but my period is never before 28 days or after 31 but I've heard clomid can change it?. I have a test here but I'm scared to do it, to be honest I am still thinking af is gonna arrive, I keep going off to the bathroom thinking it's here but it's jst like a watery cm. I will definatley try to test 2mrw morn if af don't arrive. I will let y'all know :). Have a lovely day ladies & God bless. X

Sorry hopeful I forgot to mention I had no side effects that I know of but I did get a cold at the begining of my cycle then a bad runny nose & a really dry throat & mouth about a week ago, I don't know if thats side effects? X

Afternoon ladies. Another temperature plummet this morning so guessing my period is either coming today or tomorrow, damn it all! Still, I have made a cracking victoria sponge cake, just had a slice, and now as DP is off being busy elsewhere for a few hours, I think I may go for a long lazy bath as consolation. It doesn't come close to consolation, but hey ho...there's always next month. It's what I say every sodding month. But next week I'm determined to overcome my anxiety and go and register with the local doctor and sort out some blood tests. It's a start, long overdue too!

gum Your hypothesis of the Cbfm only giving Highs instead of Peak/Ovulation because of measuring in the morning makes sense - I had thought the same thing. For my cheapie OPKs, they say not to poas first thing in the morning, as the LH is being synthesised during the day, so I was a bit when I read the instructions for the cbfm, where they specifically state that you must use the first morning pee. That way, you're bound to miss the peak, aren't you? Has anyone every tried to use the Cbfm in the evening, against the instructions? I'm curious what that would do to the readings...
Mind you, even with the OPKs it's a bit of a hit & miss for me - I got a faint line on Friday night, then a stronger one (but still not as strong or stronger than the control line) on Saturday late morning, and then only a whisper of a line Saturday evening . Thankfully, my temps are quite clearly on the way up, so I guess it's all happening. But I missed my temp taking on Friday morning, argh! DS had been ill Thursday night, and I was sitting up with him, then slept straight through my alarm for temp taking...

stephenie I get baby envy, but I think it is enforced because I had a miscarriage. Since then everyone and the world seems to be pregnant or announcing it. My DH doesn't get it either.
Two of my very close friends are pg with their second, and I had so been looking forward of spending our mat leaves together again (we're NCT buddies). Not going to happen now.
Plus, from now until about August, at least 1-2 babies are due in my circle of friends every month. I'm really hoping that I'll develop a very thick skin very soon. I hate myself a little bit for begrudging them their joy and happiness

Hello to all..I hope everybody has had a lovely weekend.
Dp safely deposited back on train to the barracks...it still doesnt get any easier but at least when he comes home next week its for a whole week instead of 2 nights.
I can sympathise with the baby envy thing. I just seem to notice pregnancy more now I think. I'm fortunate not to have any expectant friends.