Those waiting to ttc... (slightly pointless thread)

[LoveYouForeverMyBaby]

We're ttc #2 in dec and I know it's a really silly thing to get excited about, but just started taking folic acid and feeling very excited about it!

Sorry for the pointless thread.

[Fgrin]

Apologies for the previous random message, I was trying to get my smilies to work! I clearly failed, damn!

Hi guys, may I join? I've just been reading a bit of this thread to see if it would be an ok place to hang out for a little while. I'm 40 and have had 3 miscarriages of a variety of sorts and dates but all in the first 13 weeks. I'm just getting over my last one but don't want to join an mc thread as somehow this one hasn't stunned me too much and I feel well so the focus is on getting my health on track. We only started trying a year ago and are taking it as a positive that we can get pregnant. And we'll have consultant led care this time which means that this last pregnancy is off being tested for genetic abnormalities, they're going to run some other tests on me for the known causes, etc. All of these tests are statistically unlikely to show up anything useful but it's worth a shot. From what I understood about consultant led care before meeting with him is that it's positive effects are more placebo than anything else, but I relaxed significantly as soon as it was offered so placebo seems fine enough for me! Has anyone here had it before? Also I was told by the consultant that because of my age as soon as I get the next bfp I should start taking 75 mg aspirin daily - apparently they tell everyone the same advice so I thought it might be worth spreading. (not before the bfp as it can cause problems with implantation).

So, just thinking about what I need to do. I'm staying off the caffeine and alcohol since I'm already used to it. I'm on lots of vitamins: C, E, D, B complex, omega 3, folic (I like someone called it frolic!) acid. A bit of excercise, only mildly though, my weight's normally fine but I've gained some this year. I've got loads of ov sticks and this thread has reminded me to order more pre-seed. I'll keep dipping into the posts above to see what others are doing to prep! (apologies for the long intro post!)

Welcome to one more, sorry to hear that things have not been straightforward for you, and I do hope that the desired effect of having consultant care materialises soon! Are you waiting long? (normally update the list on a weds).

I found out last night that I am not used to keeping off the alcohol! We drove about 50 miles to a big birthday party . I thought it would be fine, as the last time we went I was not drinking, and drove home and i remember being fine about it. This time I looked very wistfully at everyone else's drinks! I don't drink a lot, but I do like a pint or so when I'm out, but I would never drink even one and then drive. I think my taste for alcohol was switched off in pregnancy, and it has taken a long time to come back!

Sunshine, you made me remember when I was first pg, I told my mum, and she said, oh, there's NEVER a good time to have a baby! If we all waited until everything was ideal, nobody would get born lol!

Size 12 is only large for supermodels, for normal people is is a lovely size [henvy] [which I will return to immenently]

Hope everyone else is having a lovely weekend.

Thanks Leafmold, I hope we're in a position to try by the end of January.

I agree about the size 12 thing. Which website was that Sunshine?

Hello onemore, I am so sorry for your losses and I hope that 2013 is your year. The more women's experiences I hear of (both in real life and on mumsnet)' the more conscious I become that getting that magical BFP is just the start of the journey.

Have you read Professor Regan's book "Miscarriage - what every woman needs to know"? Towards the back there is a very small (but interesting) chapter called "The value of tender loving care in early pregnancy."

In it she recognises that tender loving care in early pregnancy can very significantly improve the outcome for women who have experienced repeated, unexplained miscarriages. In her study 'tender loving care' meant weekly visits to the early pregnancy clinic, extra ultrasounds, and extra care from research fellows, nurses and scanners. I would imagine that having consultant led care would have the same beneficial effect on outcome.

She says that where, after careful investigations, no cause is found for a woman's repeated miscarriages, 'tender loving care' is the best treatment available and the chances of having a healthy take-home baby remain high.

Oh, your post has reminded me to redouble my efforts on the caffeine front; I could give up alcohol forever without feeling too upset but coffee is a whole different story!

So sorry to hear of your losses onemore I applaud you for being so strong and being positive.

This is a great thread and everyone is so supportive.

Oh, I'm out. It's been a boring cycle really - not even the teeniest hint of a possible pregnancy during the 2ww. Great for the nerves but dull as dishwater.

Hmmm, I'm not yet sure of my strategy for next month.

Bridget, aw, good luck for the next one! I'm sure you will have success soon. The book you mention sounds really interesting. I sort of assumed tlc in that context would mean feet up, time off work, being cooked for, shopped for, cleaned for. . what do you think? I'm sure all that would help as well as extra care from medical professionals!

I do hope the next cycle is a good one for you, and we get some extra special bfpS soon.

That book sounds really intersting Bridget thanks, that sounds hopeful. Sorry you've had an uneventful cycle. Because you mentioend strategy I'm curious what you've been doing?

Hi Love thanks, I'm not sure you can choose whether to be strong or not so I just feel lucky it's worked out that way. I think this mc in some ways helped me put the previous one, which really knocked me for six, to rest a bit. I don't know why, it just isn't nearly as bad. I also know that the stats at my age make this more likely - it doesn't have to happen but it is for me so we might have to go through a bit of this. I just hope we get one that sticks!

Leaf I'm sure that's a good definition of tlc as well!

Hi onemore and welcome!
So sorry to hear of the hard time you've been going through. I can't imagine how it feels to have had so many losses. Fair play to you for giving it another go. Best of luck to you.

Any word from amiready? I've been wondering about her work situation.

I've another two weeks of stress leave so hopefully will know within that time if I have to hand in my notice or not. I am totally more upset about the idea of having to wait to ttc than losing my job even though I love it apart from the evil boss. We had some afternoon delights as DS was napping this afternoon and having to use a condom made me really sad after - sorry if this is tmi.

sunshine I'd love to be a size 12!

bridget Good luck for next month!

Funny you are all talking about the drinking thing. I used to be a BIG drinker but since being pg and having DS I am such a lightweight and rarely drink. I had a wedding to go to a couple of weeks after I found out last time and made up a story about antibiotics for a tooth infection...which triggered a 30 mins conversation around the table about other peoples teeth issues etc. I was mortified! It did divert people's attention though but my close friends guessed alright.

Hope everyone has a good week

Thank you for the good wishes Leafmould. I keep trying to remind myself to be patient but sometimes I have a wobbly moment.

Hmm, interestingly, I think the type of things you mention have very minimal, if indeed any, impact on miscarrriage rates. I can imagine some women going stir-crazy and becoming even more anxious without normal life to distract/concentrate on. There seems to be a unique benefit that extra monitoring from the medical profession can give.

I hope you are all set-up for the week ahead. It is soo cold here all of a sudden.

Thanks Winterpansy - I'll confess to some size 12 envy too!

I hope you know where you stand re: your notice very soon (if there was a 'stay strong' smiley I'd use it here)

bridget I had no symptoms during the tww with dd, you could very well be pg, keep positive thoughts!

I'm terrible at imagining every symptom possible which only sets me up for a fall.

I'm a bit late, but can I join too? :) DP and I made the decision to go for it and ttc this month... i just hadn't realised there would be a frustrating month before we know if we've made it or not! It might sound a bit stupid, but I had just though we'd do it and then take the test a day or too later. The wait between ovulating and taking the test is going to be totally agonising! This will be our first and we are both v excited too. Roll on Christmas! Its great to have some company on this... Good luck everyone!

Hi Zedds, winterpansy, Toomuch, Cherry, Leafmould, Onemore, and purpleaura! And to the others I've met before.

Onemore, I'm so sorry for your losses and hope things look up soon and the consultant-led care has the effect Bridget is describing.

purpleaura, hello! This is, strictly speaking, a thread for those waiting before they can try, but I'm sure you're welcome to hang around here. :) Good luck and hoping for a BFP for you!

Hi purpleaura welcome, dh and I have decided to ttc (last month) even though we were planning to wait until this month. I've also started another thread for those ttc now if you want to join some of us over there - the slightly misspelled "slghtoy pountless ones ttc now (sort of) thread"

Thanks bridget, just found out there is a big Board meeting called for Thursday regarding my issues so I'm hopefully of an answer soon either way. I am the worlds most impatient person so this is utterly stressful!

Loveyou Oohh a 'ttc now' thread. How exciting. Wasn't so long ago you started this one and time has flown! Hope it's full of BFPs very soon

Thanks for the warm welcome :) I will indeed hop over to your thread LoveYouForeverMyBaby. Ta!

Well, I failed miserably at coming off of the ADs. I'm back on them again. I was in a right state, thinking about suicide again, so it looks like TTCing will have to be put on hold until I can safely come off of the ADs.

Aw, that's very upsetting sorelip. At least you were aware of what was happening and are back on the meds, sounds like that is the best thing for you at the minute. Ttc can wait until you are wholly better - that's the right thing for and your future baby. Take care of yourself

Evening ladies. Not read back much, I see a few people have had very hard times :(

So far my flowers have just started blooming according to Pink Pad so we managed one episode of DTD. I think it may take a little more effort than that though!

Bridget, Loopydog has started walking again after being scared by fireworks, but on a cold dark damp night you can't prise him out the front door with a crowbar! He is asleep on his duvet by the radiator right now.

winter I know both so exciting and scary at the same time, not cut out for this 2ww business!

Ooh, a ttc thread will go there and mark place for later, thanks for making that Love. Perhaps the typo theme can continue into an ante natal thread sometime soon!

I've been Christmas shopping today, really glad Christmas is coming as it's something to keep my eye on while waiting for ttc'ing! Sadly for my bank account though I seem to be preoccupying myself by purchasing lots of gifts!

Hello everyone.

purplaura there is a wonderful thing called the 2ww, which stands for the 2 week wait, as that is the usual length of time to have to wait between ovulation and positive pregnancy test [bfp] result. Hopefully you will only have one or 2 of them!

sorelip so sorry you have been having a difficult time. It can't have been an easy decision to make, but sounds like the right one at this time. I hope you are getting support from helpful people in coming off ad's. I have a friend who is planning to try to come off them in summer as she finds winter the hardest time. Hope you can find a way to make it easier for yourself.

tigerseye what a lovely way of putting it! Can't wait for my flowers to start blooming too! Had a chat with dp today, and although the timing is a bit flexible, he said he wasn't going to change his mind, which I have been worried about, since it has taken him a long time to come round to the idea.

bridget your dog in the frost and frozen puddles does sound charming. I'm sure you will manage fine with dog and ababy. I looked after my friends dog for a weekend when my dd was a few months old, and I have to say it was tricky to manage a buggy and a dog on a lead, but once she had her dd, she made it look really easy! I think as long as you are confident about handling the dog, and there is a good level of obedience, it will be fine.

winterpansy Thursday is not far away! I do hope it goes your way and all this worry is resolved. Fx for you.

one more ooh, I hope you enjoyed the shopping! I'm not sure when I'm going to get some time to go. I want to take the kids so they can choose some Xmas cards and a present for each other. They are so bad at keeping a secret, and the way they say 'ohh thank you I really wanted a mermaid in a shoe!' before they have opened it properly is hilarious!but I AM looking forward to going shopping WITHOUT them, too!

love you I'm going to go and lurk on your other thread now!