I'm 13 weeks with #1 and absolutely TERRIFIED of giving birth and all that surrounds it. I have a low pain threshold and am very bad with pain (usually pass out on my period, even with painkillers) so had been thinking about having an ELCS as the thought of giving birth sends me into a daily panic. However when I was doing research/talking to midwife I found it really hard to find an honest and fair weigh-in on pros and cons - she gave me a leaflet with supposedly all the "pros and cons" of all the birth choices but it only had pros for vaginal birth and cons of ELCS.
To help me decide I wrote down my pros and cons here (might help someone, you never know) - if I've missed any, or you have any experiences you want to share which might help me make my decision, please do let me know!
Vaginal Birth
Pros
- If all goes well, quicker, easier, and less painful recovery
- Home sooner, and possibility of home birth which would be much less stressful
- Water birth option, which I know would help me relax
- Various pain relief options, including epidural, if and when I want them
Cons
- If I tear/need stitches, recovery could still be painful and long, with potential risks (e.g. scar tissue, incontinence)
- Unlikely to have home birth if I want pain relief
- Might get denied pain relief, which would terrify me
- May not get a water birth depending on Covid restrictions/if it's busy
- Trickier to plan, you're at the mercy of your body/hospital on the day
- Nudity (I know, I'm a massive prude, but it really does bother me, I don't want strangers seeing/measuring/examining areas I'd rather keep private)
ELCS
Pros
- Anaesthetic guaranteed :)
- Much quicker actual birth
- I will know in advance what day it's going to happen, and what will go on
- Much calmer as it will be planned
- No risk of tearing/cutting/stitches/permanent injury down there
Cons
- Slower, more painful recovery
- Small risk of serious complication, e.g. infection, which would make recovery even slower and more painful
- More days in hospital
- I think there's a limit on the number of CS you can have? Not that I'm even thinking about #2 now, but I had always wanted a larger family...
That's about all I've got. If anyone has anything they want to add in which might help make my decision, please do let me know!