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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Bit of a personal question so please dont take offence...

54 replies

Boogles91 · 07/04/2014 00:13

Im due with my 2nd in middle of july(1st resulted in mc) and have been wondering for a while, does everything go back to normal downstairs after a few weeks or not? I knkw every womans different but im quite tight normally down there and preparing myself for a tear or to be cut. Just wouldnt mind reading experiences of how your bodies were afterwards aswell. Im quite slim but already had tons of stretchmarks due to water retntion when growing up, so they dont bother me just as ive said the rest of me body lol

OP posts:
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seasalt · 07/04/2014 00:22

What happened the first time?

seasalt · 07/04/2014 00:24

Oh sorry I didn't see you had mc. As you say it's different for everyone. Try not to worry.

Cookiepants · 07/04/2014 00:25

Never been the same OP, can't tell what's different but def not the same (trying to work up courage to ask DH). Can't say it worries me though.

TheFabulousIdiot · 07/04/2014 00:32

I definitely notice a difference when inserting a tampon. DS is three.

Mamtothree · 07/04/2014 00:55

a friend of mine, same age as me, had three c-sections. I had three normal deliveries.

She mentioned the other day that when she went for a smear, the nurse looked at her bits and then looked at her notes. Nurse said "it says here you've had three children". My friend said, yes. Nurse said, it doesnt look like it ! Friend said, three c-sections. Nurse said Aaahhh.

When my friend told me about this its really got me thinking about my bits. I actually asked about it on here earlier but I'm pretty sure I tore and they didnt stitch me back up. DD2 is 5 now and I'm very loose down there despite pelvic floor. Bitten the bullet now and made an appointment to see GP :(

scarletforya · 07/04/2014 00:57

I had a section so everything is the same.

TheTerribleBaroness · 07/04/2014 00:59

My pelvic floor is fine, I didn't tear, periods only last two or three days but are too heavy to use a tampon, so I've gone back to towels. Don't get cramps anymore though, so that's a plus! :)

Nocomet · 07/04/2014 01:24

I had an episiotomy with DD1, which they must have sewn very neatly, because I didn't notice much difference.

I could feel the tiny little tart DD2 made for ages as a little V shaped nick (she was a home birth and I wonder if the hospital would have put one or two stitches).

I guess my vagina is very slightly slacker when I'm relaxed as I find widthways expanding tampons better than tampax (which were my favorites Before children).

However, I can still tighten my vagina enough to squeeze my small fingers, so DH doesn't complain Wink

Nocomet · 07/04/2014 01:25

Tear not tart

PeaceLillyDoge · 07/04/2014 01:29

I have birth four weeks ago, slight graze, had a look earlier (was too scared to before! ) And it looks exactly the same as it always did thank feck

Orangeisthenewbanana · 07/04/2014 01:44

I had a small tear which was stitched up. At first, it didn't feel right at all, much looser and it really bothered
me the first time DH and I DTD afterwards - felt self conscious about it for months Sad. Don't really use tampons and haven't yet had a proper period after breastfeeding so can't compare that yet. However, with time, I've got over my issues with things feeling a bit different and sex is good again. Just keep on doing your pelvic floor - that's really helped me. DD is 14 months.

WallyBantersJunkBox · 07/04/2014 01:54

I had 14 stitches, my flesh was torn like wet toilet paper. Grin

There is a slightly numb bit of solid scar tissue but I actually felt smaller after the procedure and DH agreed.

TheFabulousIdiot · 07/04/2014 10:36

PS - my pelvic floor is ok. Occasionally if I sneeze twice in quick succession then a bit of wee might come out.

HarderToKidnap · 07/04/2014 13:21

Perineal massage is your friend! Google it for instructions.

I had slight wee leakage for about three months post delivery, normal birth, small 2nd degree tear. Did my pelvic floors and it was all back to normal after that.

Original poster
Boogles91 · 07/04/2014 23:09

Thankyou for all your replies, given mea bit more insight of what might be lol i would do that massage thing but ive had constant thrush so far as im having to take prohplactic antibiotics cus of past history of kidney probs :/ and ita so tight down there :( and sore...

OP posts:
TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 08/04/2014 15:52

I'm not the same but given I had a 9lb baby with a head circumference off the centiles and an episiotomy I'm not bad Grin - DH doesn't notice any difference. (or admitted to)

The important thing is (boringly) to do Pelvic Floor exercises religiously before and after.

Also do as much pregnancy core exercises as you can - especially modified squats and lunges and then to get back to them once you've recovered from the birth. Also if you are worried insist you see a Physio in the hospital or get a referral afterwards.

scarlettsmummy2 · 08/04/2014 16:10

Two second degree tears, everything fine.

IdaClair · 08/04/2014 16:16

Didn't do pelvic floor exercises, didn't do massage. DID push as and when I wanted to without anyone telling me what to do in the positions I felt were right at the time, this was a priority for me and I think it probably helped.

Two babies, no cuts, no tearing, looks and feels the same.

IdaClair · 08/04/2014 16:16

Got bloody stretch marks tho Grin

SicknSpan · 08/04/2014 23:09

DH and I can't feel any difference during sex, my pelvic floor is fine normally (pg with dc3 so it's a bit under pressure at the moment!). Tore with ds1, just a few stitches nothing too painful, and just a graze with ds2.

Like a previous poster I find that the tampax I used to use are too slim now so I need to use ones that expand width wise like lilets, otherwise they slip down too far and are uncomfortable.

But that's about it, nothing too traumatic!

confuddledDOTcom · 08/04/2014 23:27

My last baby the midwife said she was going to check for damage and said "Oh, you wouldn't know you've just had a baby everything's back to normal!" The one before that I had a few stitches, was in hospital for 6 weeks after and when they checked on my stitches whilst I was still in they said it all looked normal. Some women do take a long time, you really don't know who you will be.

I agree with Ida too. Pelvic floor exercises are losing favour.

MostWicked · 08/04/2014 23:27

2 babies, stitches both times, all working well from a couple of months afterwards. Pelvic floor exercises help.

weebairn · 09/04/2014 07:58

I had a normal vaginal delivery - no tears, not cuts, and pelvic floor fine - I can run, cough, jump no issues whatsoever. I did do a LOT of pelvic floor exercises post birth. Sex feels much the same as ever , 18 months on.

I would say sex was uncomfortable for around 6 months. I don't know exactly why, as I didn't tear. I used lube. 6-12 months it was… ok.. but not like it was before. I got my periods back at a year and then everything was absolutely fine. No one ever told me it could take that long.

AllTheNamesIWantHaveGone · 10/04/2014 12:18

Far too much information but ...

I had a second degree tear which required stitches. I actually felt like everything was stitched back much tighter than it was pre-childbirth and if I'm totally honest I was rather pleased with the result !!

weebairn · 10/04/2014 16:18

I also felt tighter, even though I didn't have stitches. No idea why. That's why it was uncomfortable, for quite a while - felt tight.