Bit of a personal question so please dont take offence...

[Boogles91]

Im due with my 2nd in middle of july(1st resulted in mc) and have been wondering for a while, does everything go back to normal downstairs after a few weeks or not? I knkw every womans different but im quite tight normally down there and preparing myself for a tear or to be cut. Just wouldnt mind reading experiences of how your bodies were afterwards aswell. Im quite slim but already had tons of stretchmarks due to water retntion when growing up, so they dont bother me just as ive said the rest of me body lol

I had two vaginal births, no cutting or tearing (did the perineal massage both times). It took about 3 months I would say before it felt pretty much as before downstairs. I am now doing pelvic floor exercises religiously courtesy of Mumsnet advice - a bit like the massage, probably works and gives me loads of confidence!

Two vaginal births, cutting each time plus 2nd degree tears with the second one. Fantastic job of stitches done both times. Epidurals are great - didn't feel any of the above!

Back to a different version of normal within 3 months first time, except for a small sore spot that took a bit longer. Back to normal within 6 weeks second time.

Core exercises and pelvic floor work a lot more necessary after dc2.

I had two 'slight grazes' from a vaginal birth.

We had sex two weeks post birth. Everything felt fine, according to OH at least! Everything stopped feeling like it was going to fall out after about day three, and after about a month, it was liked I'd never had a baby.

Interesting that you comment you're quite tight down there and so expect to tear or be cut. I was exactly the same (couldn't use tampons, had to be really really super foreplay-ed to have comfortable sex - tmi?? ) and so expected that I would never be able to get a baby out of 'there'!!! My midwife couldn't manage to get her fingers in to do a sweep at the first attempt - I had to really really focus and breath to enable her to do it - and at that point I was resigned to either ending up with another c-section (emcs first time around) or just tearing open like Tom Jones's shirt.

But as it turned out, I used Hypnobirthing breathing techniques, had no directed pushing and ended up with one minor graze. I was shocked and delighted! So I don't think that being tight down there is necessarily an indicator that you will tear at all - the midwife commented before looking 'down there' that since DD2 was born slowly she didn't expect there would be any damage.

I will keep that in mind emsyj :) i would love as natural birth as possible. I have a blocked kidney at the mo and given my history with my kidneys im not sure if im going to be able to now as ive read up they normally like to induce or recomend a c section. It had pretty bad scarring onit already and now its blocked and causes me so much pain doesnt help it lol hope my kidney holds out and doesnt get worse so i can have a natural birth x thankyou for the rest of the comments too

I had an episiotomy 13 weeks ago and still waiting for it to fully heal (it got infected so taking longer than the 6 weeks they told me it would be). That's something I wasn't really prepared for - taking so long to heal afterwards

I was like you OP, thought I would tear and need stitches but I had a very quick labour (VBAC) and delivery of 8lb baby with only a graze
Down below healed in about a week ie: no stinging etc after a week and swelling went down
I checked myself in the mirror and it all looked the same and sex was exactly the same and not sore or painful and my partner said everything feels good too
I had a section with my first baby so was quite worried about baby no 2 but it all turned out okay

i have 3 children and i dont feel any different. My first 2 were born 11 months apart, so i didnt really have time for it to "go back to normal". All vaginal delivery, no tearing. Was quite obsessed about pelvic floor exercises, even do them now and she is 5 years old" Sex feels no different than it did before the children.

My first - no difference at all really. 7lbs and second degree tear.

After my second there was a very noticeable difference. 9lbs and again a second degree tear. It took about 12 months to recover I would say.

Things did go back to a useable condition, I have no issues with weeing myself, running about etc. BUT I did end up with a minor rectocele (prolapse) which has caused me some problems. Certain sexual positions are off-limits entirely and I do get a lot more air inside during sex. It's a total downer, and being completely honest if I had known I would've pushed to have a cesearean.

I'm now on my third and final pregnancy and I'm having a cesarean for this one due to the rectocele. I had to exaggerate my symptoms to get it, but I knew another birth would really make things worse, and the opinion from most health professionals is that it's just something you 'deal with'.

I had a second degree tear. I dont feel quite the same (not even tried tampons since) but dh doesn't seem to notice a difference

Last time I had a gynecological exam the nurse asked if I'd ever had a vaginal birth. I assume that having to ask meant that she couldn't tell either!

I was wondering the same thing. I had a 2nd degree tear and am still in the process of healing. I only had the baby 2 weeks ago, but so far it's healing pretty quickly. It didn't really hurt past a week for me, it was the stitches itching for a few days that drove me nuts.

I had a second degree tear which was stitched up so meticulously that I never really had much pain from it and healed within a couple of weeks. I'm 8 weeks post partum now and things feel pretty normal - no incontinence thank god, though DP and I are yet to DTD due to lack of time and the ever-screaming DS in the bed with us!

I had no stretchmarks and only put on about 11lb in total as I kept up with the exercise right to the end. I was back in my old clothes within a couple of weeks of giving birth and my stomach is flatter than it was before I got pregnant. Though sometimes I think I'd happily be dealing with a few extra kilos if DS would just bloody sleep!!

Little baby who was lateral oblique presentation, episiotomy and massive (to scared to ask degree). It took a consultant over an hour to stitch me back up. This was all 10 years ago and it will never be how it was before.

I got a 4th degree tear OP got stitched up and was like a born again virgin afterwards

They stitched me up so tight I had to see a specialist and sit through the most humiliating talk on some stretching tools worked that they gave me (basically a big bag of nhs dildos ranging from the size of a finger to the size of a small babies head )even got given a lovely pink carry case to take them home with.

Even more embarrassing as I came out another woman got into the lift with me clutching her pink case full of dildos and we had a painfully awkward lift ride to the ground floor

I've had 3 dc's and only had 'grazes' with them so no need for stitches.
My pelvic floor/bladder control is fine - I can sneeze, jump on a trampoline etc without peeing. But I think I have a little prolapse. It's not a problem and doesn't effect sex etc but after 3 vaginal births with largish babies my vagina isn't what it was.

Cafe sorry, was going to type my experience but your post made me laugh so much!! Sneezing and jumping on trampoline without peeing!

Got me, sorry funny funny xxxxx

OP, had stitches ten fold with my two, all good now, don't worry hun and good luck!!

Cafe gonna go pee on a trampoline!!!

Haha Oops - I only say that because my friend can't do that anymore! if she jumps on a trampoline she pees herself. Apparently it's quite common.

I had 10lb DS by forceps, they gave me an episiotomy and DS ripped me some more, so it was all a bit messy. They sewed me too tightly. I had to be re-cut and re-sewn exactly a year later. I had pain inside where scar tissue trapped a nerve. I was able to get in and out of a car painlessly when DS was 2. We have just been able to dtd without pain. DS is 2.4.
It effects women in different ways. I was very well-prepared pre-birth. I don't think it's something you can control.

congratulations OP

I had an epidural and ventouse delivery with my first.. i've never felt anything during intercourse since (nearly 19 years) 2 kids since. Apparently my wotsit is collapsing in on itself. i still have awesome grip, just no nerve endings.

Second degree tear here. DTD four weeks post birth and when I asked DH for honest assessment in case I should talk to GP he said it didn't feel different. I was with full to the pelvic floor exercises from day one though!

I think I'm the same. DH swears I am and I think he is the type who would say. No tears just a slight graze first time. Although I remember noticing a difference between dc1 and 2. Less sensitivity iykwim although all feels normal now so either it's returned or I have got used to it.

Is no one totally buggered like me?

Take it from me, after my dc Vlad. I was never the same downstairs. Igor didn't want to touch me with his 10 inch Soviet pole.