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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Home Births. What do i need to do?

67 replies

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 20:26

Hello all.
I am seriously thinking of a homebirth this time. If i go to term (both girls were born on their due dates) then i'll have a 5 year old and 1 year old at home. Nana could come and watch them and i could give Birth downstairs in the living room. My main concern is the noise i make, have been likened to a wild animal and don't want to scare the others Honest!!
So, i did broach the subject with the midwife at booking in app, just that i was wondering about it 'maybe' and got no response so i am assuming either she wasn't too happy or thought (rightly) that it was too early for me to know.

I guess what i'm asking for is experience of Home Birth, need to knows, good and bad and what rights do i actually have in Midwife says they are short staffed and can't do it?

I had no complications with the girls (well they tried forceps with dd1 but i said no it was excruciating and did it myself on the next push. DD2 was a textbook Birth.
Both VERY quick though!

So, any advice?

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starlover · 30/04/2006 20:28

angeliz.. i don't know a huge amount about how it all works.. but if you're worried that the midwife will say no, or that they won't come out if they're short staffed or whatever (i think actually they will, and your ocmmunity midwife would come ).
but you could maybe hire a doula or an independant midwife?

lockets · 30/04/2006 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tortoise · 30/04/2006 20:30

I had home births with 3 out of 4 of my dc.DS1 went to my mums when i was having ds2.with the next two home births the other dc stayed with a friend then came back about an hr after the birth.My midwife said was up to me if wanted them there but i didnt like the thought of them seeing me in pain!You should do what you feel is right for your dc.Good luck.

Seashells · 30/04/2006 20:34

I wanted a homebirth with this pg, after 2 straight forward pregnancies and labours. I brought up the subject with midwife quite early on, and she said to mention it again at around 32 weeks so they could book it all in. Unfortunately by this time my iron levels had dropped and have not improved yet so homebirth out of the question.
Hope you get to do it, I think it would be a lovely experience.

WWWontSlagOffAnyone · 30/04/2006 20:44

Angeliz, I had both mine at home and would wholeheartedly recommend it. It's your legal right to have one, don't let them tell you they're short staffed! It's so lovely being at home in your own bed afterwards, bliss. (I don't have any experience of the alternatives though!) Go for it, there's a HUGE long old thread somewhere, I'll see if I can find it.

Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 20:47

Oh thanks all
My Hospital are great and i see both my Births as positive (and beleive me i count my blessing after some of the stories i've read on here). The thing that really got to me after dd2 though was, they made me get up about half hour after i had her and shower so they could change the bed. I was wobbly and had blood pouring down my legs. Also no pain releif till 2 hours later and then only 2 paracetamol. I really do see her Birth as positive though and they are tiny blips that if i had to go to Hospital i would NOT do again. I would not shower till i was ready and i'll make sure i bring drugs!

I think it would be so special to do it at home though.+

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hewlettsdaughter · 30/04/2006 20:56

Go for it! I had dd downstairs in the living room while ds (4 and a half) was upstairs asleep - he had no idea! We didn't plan it that way (had friends lined up to either take ds or come here and look after him) but we never got round to calling them.

Have you looked at the \link{http://www.homebirth.org.uk/\Home Birth Reference Site}?

motherinferior · 30/04/2006 20:59

Go for it, girl, my home birth was FAB.

Katemum · 30/04/2006 21:00

I had a homebirth with dd and it was a lovely experience. Ds slept through the whole thing and woke in the morning to meet his new sister.
If you needed to be noisy could their nana take your kids out for a walk?

Blu · 30/04/2006 21:22

Would it be possible for the kids to go and stay with their Nana once you start labour?

I was in the house when my Mum gave birth to my brother and my sister - and was only woken up by the booming voice of the doctor in the v last stages of my s being born, was otherwise oblivious.

Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 21:27

I'd like that Blu (the kids at Nanas) and the daytime would be great.
DD2 however still co-sleeps adn she has yet to sleep anywhere but in bed with me. (Well around 12ish if i'm lucky-she stays in her cot till then). I have a little bed set up in dd1's room for her so that is my next step before having number 3 !

Nice to hear all the positivity.

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mckenzie · 30/04/2006 21:33

my DS (then 4) was awake upstairs having his bath while I was in labour downstairs. He asked what the strange noise was and Dh told him that I'd put the TV on! He went to bed as normal thoguh and didn't wake up at all even though I laboured and gave birth downstairs without pain relief an hour later.
FANTASTIC experience. Go for it!

SoupDragon · 30/04/2006 21:46

Mine was absolutely fabulous. I had a nightmare hospital birth with DS1, a text book hospital birth with DS2 but was still of the "homebirth is not for me" so it was a bit of a surprise when I realised I wanted a home water birth for DD :)

Packed the DSs off out for the day because at 9am I realised I wanted them gone now so you need to have that option. DD was born less than 15 minutes after they left! Both DSs were born at night so this was how I had envisaged it all going this time too. Luckily my parents had come up so there was ample childcare. Anyway, absolutely fab. It was quiet with no hospital bustle around, I had my own bed, bath, toilet, shower... everything. So much calmer.

Remember, you can back out and say you want to go to hospital at pretty much any point during the labour if you feel you can't cope.

Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 21:50

I am getting more convinced at all these wonderful stories.
DD2 is very clingy so that would definately be my worry too (but that would be happeneing anyway wouldn't it?). I only live 10 minutes from the Hospital too.

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CatherineG · 30/04/2006 22:05

After a quick birth with ds1 I planned a home birth with no 2.
Mentioned it to the GP on booking in and he was fine (had asked at booking in with ds1 where I wanted to have it).
MW was also very keen when I mentioned it at booking in with her.

Planned for my mum to come over and look after ds1 when it happened, but in the event she didn't get here in time, umm and neither did the midwife.

With regard to rights / short staffing etc have a look at the AIMS website, there is also an excellent home birth board on the BabyCentre website (can I mention that here??)

Congrats on your pg and good luck!

starlover · 30/04/2006 22:07

angeliz with regard to dd being clingy... arrange for your mum (or whoever) to come over. then you can keep her with you, if she wants... but should it come to a point where you want her out then they can just whisk her outside for a walk or whatever to distract her.
assuming it's daytime!

SoupDragon · 30/04/2006 22:09

Oooooh - and you get your home address as "place of birth" on your baby's birth certificate!! That was an unexpected bonus for me :o

Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 22:10

If it's daytime it'll probably be better for my Mam to take the girls out for a bit. It's nighttime i'll be worried about the noise

Am getting quite excited at the thought (though still to decide 100%). My Parents are against it wholeheartedly btw!

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Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 22:10

Oh i'd like that Soupy!

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Hattie05 · 30/04/2006 22:12

Hi Angeliz, i too am hoping of a homebirth for similar reasons to yourself.

The attraction of - comfort of own home, dd not having to be shoved off anywhere etc.

I had to book in with my GP when i was 6 wks. I told him i wanted a homebirth and he said he couldn't stop me but he didn't recommend it as if the baby had the cord round their neck they could die!!??.

So i dutifully ignored him, and went to see the midwife a week later, who said fine, booked me in as a homebirth straight away so that i just have midwife led care in the community, rather than being assigned a consultant and a hospital. She explained that only if i showed any complications would i be referred to a consultant.
I guess each area does this at different times.

Good luck! when are you due?

Hattie05 · 30/04/2006 22:13

I too am concerned about the noise was pretty noisy in first labour!

CatherineG · 30/04/2006 22:16

Hattie - I was EXTREMELY loud in labout with ds1 - I was heard in the car park (quite proud of that one), but don't think I made much noise with ds2, it didn't wake ds1 anyway.

cord round neck - ds1 had the cord round his neck and i had to hold on a push while the MW hooked it over. ds2 was unassisted and mentioned to MW a week later about what would have happened re cord etc and he said its only if the pushing last a long time that it is really a problem, otherwise the baby and cord is born and the cord then falls out (I was amazed how long the cord was!).
But the hooked over the head on a push could be done as easily at home as in hospital.

Original poster

Angeliz · 30/04/2006 22:17

I'm due late August.
Good luck Hattie
I am seeing the Midwife on Thursday, it's only the second time i've seen her so i'm going to broach the subject then.
Your G.P sounds very abrupt!
That's what my Mam says btw. (worries about the cord)
I think here it's Midwife care only too as i'm classed as low risk so i don't have any Consultant appointments.

OP posts:

Hattie05 · 30/04/2006 22:22

I know Catherine, i had exact same experience with dd having cord round neck, midwife was urging me not to push for this reason, but i couldn't stop and is the reason i tore so badly . I guess nature will do whatever it can!

But i totally agree, this will happen wherever you are, and midwives will cope the same way.

I just took my GP's comments with a pinch of salt

Good luck with mw then Angeliz, i have a long way to go not due till November!

starlover · 30/04/2006 22:25

fwiw, aside from cord round neck type stuff... complications/intervention are less likely to occur in a homebirth than a hospital birth

statistics are flawed too... for example, the percentage of home births who have to transfer to hospital include ALL people who are in latter stages or labour/give birth at home, whether planned or not... ie the quick ones that arrive before the ambulance/teenage girl hiding it from everyone

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