Home Births. What do i need to do?

[Angeliz]

Hello all.
I am seriously thinking of a homebirth this time. If i go to term (both girls were born on their due dates) then i'll have a 5 year old and 1 year old at home. Nana could come and watch them and i could give Birth downstairs in the living room. My main concern is the noise i make, have been likened to a wild animal and don't want to scare the others Honest!!
So, i did broach the subject with the midwife at booking in app, just that i was wondering about it 'maybe' and got no response so i am assuming either she wasn't too happy or thought (rightly) that it was too early for me to know.

I guess what i'm asking for is experience of Home Birth, need to knows, good and bad and what rights do i actually have in Midwife says they are short staffed and can't do it?

I had no complications with the girls (well they tried forceps with dd1 but i said no it was excruciating and did it myself on the next push. DD2 was a textbook Birth.
Both VERY quick though!

So, any advice?

I had a wonderful home birth with DS2. And one of the best things is you get fed during labour to keep your strength up. Toast and honey in the birthing pool yum yum!

The labour was actually longer than DS1, but I was glad I was at home with top care and attention, as I would probably have been whisked away for an unnecessary caesarian in hospital just because I didn't fit into their schedules. With a home birth you get experienced midwives and one or two to yourself (in hospital they can be running after 3 women in labour at once).

Weigh up whether your local team will support you, as it varies from area to area, and consider getting an independent midwife.

The midwives will be in touch with the local hospital anyway when you go into labour, and you can transfer if necessary.

Also done it both ways and would say home, home home!!
I didn't fancy other children around though and they stayed night at friends.

Home birth was serene - and the fastest recovery of all 4 of mine.

The only thing that shocked me at the time was how quickly afterwards the midwives left.

More great stories
I am seeing the Midwife this afternoon so will see what her attitude is!

well this has been really interesting ladies. At 32 weeks i'm considering it for my first. I've been put off by the hopelessness of the hospital's admin, and the feeling of how short staffed the midwives are. The thought of having a midwife with me throughout and not worrying about when to go to hospital, plus we live only 10 minutes away from the hosp if i need help is making me think seriously about it. I'm going to my NCT's info session in a couple of weeks with hubbie to find out more facts.

Good luck VonnieB

Just dropped dd2 off at my Mam and Dad's house and this was the conversation.

M+D - 'are you going to talk to the Midwife about it?'
ME - 'Yes this afternoon'
M+D - 'We think you should have it in Hospital, it's safer'
Me - 'well it's not actually if you read up on it'
M+D - 'yes it is, and what about the noise, you'll scare the girls'
ME - 'well that's why i'd probably ask you to have the girls anyway'
Dad - (with disgusted expression-apparently he heard me from the waiting area)'Have you HEARD the noise you make?' (felt like saying no but i'm f*ing giving Birth i'm allowed)
Mam - 'Your arms are getting really fat, infact you're getting fat all over you won't like me saying that'
Me - 'but you're going to say it anyway'

Sigh. I was in a lovely mood too. All your lovely stories but real life is so different. Have yet to see miserable midwife. Bloody Nora!!

Homebirth is great. What you need to have a positive experience is to be in the place where you feel most confident and comfortable about the process. For some, that is in hospital - if you trust the medical profession and believe that you are better off in a hospital environment then you are right and you should be. If you would feel more comfortable at home and are confident that it would be the best place for you then go for it. I had my son at home and would never think to do anything else for any future children - it was a fantastic experience.

Dont let the hospital put you off - they always mumble stuff about being short staffed. We hired our birthpool from our local hospital (Homerton Hosp in Hackney, London) as we felt that the more commitment we could get from them to setting us up for a homebirth the more likely we were to get the staff we needed!

I hope you get the birth you want and that it is as peaceful as it can be!

Gosh Angeliz - not really the encouragement you need is it? Hope it went well with the midwife.

If you want to read a book that will inspire you about homebirth, I really recommend Ina May Gaskin's "Guide to childbirth". I read it as I was due with dd2 and it really gave me confidence in my body's ability to do this thing. I wish I'd read it when I had my first baby!

Excellent Pidge.
Thanks for that. There's a Borders near us now and DP and i are alwasy looking for an excuse to go book shopping

Excellent Pidge.
Thanks for that. There's a Borders near us now and DP and i are alwasy looking for an excuse to go book shopping

Angeliz if your midwife is not supportive is there another one you can see - mine really encouraged me to have a home birth when i was somewhat unsure.

I hate it when my parents do that sort of thing - its not fair!

Angeliz - I'm a sucker for bookshops too. I was loaned a copy of the Ina May Gaskin by my SIL, but was so inspired by it I bought my own copy 4 months after my dd was born! The first half of the book consists of labour stories, which I loved because they're all so different and show you how many different ways there are to do this. Also I felt they helped me get beyond my obsession with "this is a typical labour", which first time round meant I spent the whole time thinking "why isn't this like I expected". Then the second half of the book is Ina May's thoughts on natural childbirth. She's a midwife with an amazing track record of delivering babies 'at home', so her work is backed up by her experience and isn't just the ramblings of someone who doesn't know what they're talking about.

I can't wait to read that Pidge

Well, my Midwife was brilliant. She explained that there would be 2 midwives at the end. (i asked if i'd only need one). She said one would come out and that another would be called when delivery was imminenet. She did say if they are evry short staffed that she personally would be happy with a student midwife or an auxilary(sp).
(Could someone please explain exactly what auxilary means-is-does???)
Anyway, i'd be happy with just one good midwife so the extra person is not really an issue.
She said that they'd bring gas and air but i needed to get pethidine on prescription at about 36 weeks from my G.P. I didn't use it with other 2 and hope i won't need it but will get it probably for a back up.
She was really open minded about it all, not showing emotion one way or the other at first but seemed to warm to the idea herself and when i left she said "I think it's a fine idea to have a homebirth"
Obviously won't know which midwife i'll get but then i didn't know either Midwife who was with me at the girls Births so i'll just hope for a freindly one.

Can't quite beleive it. It all seems so real now.

My Parents didn't say much when they asked how it went, i know they're set against it so just hope they'll take the girls on the day and keep quiet!

I had no support from my parents when I opted for a hb either, my mum just doing the whole "ooh you'll change your mind when it starts" thing, and my dad adding a very huffy "talk to your idiotic daughter". I went with my instincts anyway and it was the best decision I've ever made. SOOOOO much better than my dd's hospital birth, lovely to feel completely secure and in control from start to end. My absolute favourite memory is of all four of us, (dh, dd, new ds and me), curled up in a freshly made bed just 2 hrs after he'd arrived. If I had a hundred children (not that I'm going to!), I would choose a hb every single time!

There are two midwifes on delivery: one for the baby one for the mum, that is in case one or both of you needs any medical attention other than the normal care.

I had three homebirths. all three fantastic. Can strongly recommend for all the reasons mentioned before. Go for it, girl!

My home birth was completely unplanned. Labour was just so quick (1hour 25 mins from first twinge to birth of dd :)) that it just happened. The midwife said because it was so quick that the next one would have to be a home birth, so Angeliz if your first two were quick I would have thought they were recommending it. In terms of your dd's hearing the noise, I was terrified of what my ds ( 2 & 8 months) would think (he was the only one with me) and that gave me an incentive to not scream and shout. I did say a few bloody hells which he has picked up on but I guess that's life. Good luck

Poor Angeliz, my mum is really into the idea when she found out I wouldn't have the same midwife throughout and that we'd probably be left to ourselves whilst they ran from one labour room to another. My mum and dad will be staying with us as they'll be over from Oz - heaven knows what my dad will think! But it's not about them, it's about YOU Angeliz. Don't make a decision based on pressure that you'll regret afterwards....

HI Just want to let you know my story. I have 5 children all homebirths, We have always had someone to look after the children as I didn't want them to be there with the birth. But they were able to see the new brother or sister straigth after it was born....stil without clothes. Our last son was born when we lived in a 2 bedroomcottage. He was born in the middle of the night in the room nextdoor to the one the 4 children were sleeping and they didn't wake up...... Next morning they woke up to find a new baby in mammy's and daddy's bed.....
I also love the idea to stay in your own bed after the birth it is such a nice experience to be together with your husband, I would have hated to be left on my own in hospital.

I had the 3 girls in the Netherlands where it is very normal to have a homebirth, thats your first option if you don't feel happy about that or with complications then you go to hospital.
Women here need to learn to have more confidence , but ultimatly it is where you feel safe that you have the best birth. Being at home things progress more naturaly because you can just cary on doing things in your early stages of labour which makes you more relaxed.

I have just found out I am expecting our 6th child and I am really looking forward to do it all over again.