Tongue tie. Very upset. Please help me get through the next week

[GoodVibrations]

DD2 5 days old has tongue tie. My nipples looks like they have been slashed with knives and are full of scabs (that fall off and make feeding even more excrutiating). We have an appointment to have it snipped next week but I am going mad with pain and tiredness.

Latch is initially really good (I bf DD1 until 22 months, plus have had lactation consultant helping me this time) but then DD2 slips off/ chews nipple. Taking her off (finger in corner of mouth to release suction) is even more painful.

We are trying & failing to syringe feed. DD obviously hates it and spits it out/ cries. It also gives her terrible wind so she cries most of the time. Cup feeding did not work either. Have now been told I may have to use teats but really worried this will impact breastfeeding.

I have had 10 hours of very broken sleep in 6 nights. I haven't left the house since the birth. I spend all day with my baps out to get air to the nipples to help them heal. I'm using vaseline and rubbing nips with milk after a feed/ express.

Currently expressing every 3 hours and trying to bfeed when I feel brave enough.

Now I've typed all that I'm not sure what help I want . I suppose any advice on cup/ syringe feeding, impact of bottle feeding and some general kind words to help me get through :)

Congratulations on your DD!

I don't have any personal experience, but you might find some useful ideas on the 'DC3 is two days old' thread.
here

It needs snipping NOW. Phone around local hospitals and try and get earlier appointment. They left it too late for me. Push them and keep calling and pay if necessary. Next week too late.

Oh you poor thing. I didn't have anything like as bad as you are describing, but I used shields for the first wee while - didn't remove the pain completely but did make it bearable. Have you tried tea tree oil in a warm bath? That really helped my healing.

Congratulations on your new addition, hope things get easier soon!

Ps cup feeding sucks. We tried with it for few days, used a bottle and he was fine doing both, just snipped too late as milk dried up and I got sick. Will not nec ruin your bf but as I said call everyone locally to rush appt. Search online to find all places that will snip. So fed up of hearing this why is it not checked at peads check and snipped asap. So sorry you are having problems.

Pps we were offered an appt 2 weeks later at bath hospital but got one the next day in Bristol. Please please try.

Ppps you will be amazed the difference once is snipped. Sorry get so excited about this subject I post before finishing! You'll be fine, my problem was it was 10 days of it and my illnesses too. Please post how you get on and don't accept no for an answer. I usually support the nhs but they are f ing useless at diagnosing and treating TT.

Definitely, DEFINITELY get it snipped.
I had tongue tie as a child but wasn't diagnosed until age 11 after years of speech problems - by which time instead of a quick snip I had to have a night in hospital & then start speech therapy. I didn't hear until years later what hell my DM had trying to breastfeed. It's really, really worth getting it done NOW.

Good vibrations - has the LC talked to you about finger feeding (NG tube taped to finger with other end in a cup of milk - baby sucks on your finger to get the milk out) as an alternative to cup/syringe feeding?

You really don't want to let scabs form as (I'm sure you are painfully aware) they just get sucked off by baby causing greater damage. Jelonet is a moist wound healing dressing available from pharmacies or you can try slathering with lansinoh or similar and not letting your nipples dry up so the scabs don't form.

Is the LC an IBCLC or otherwise? If she is an IBCLC then she should be able to refer you to one of her colleagues who do tongue tie dividing. It might cost you ~£90 but it would probably be very worth it.

Good luck and congratulations on your new daughter.

Ok, sorry if this is not the way you want to go and I totally agree that you need to get a quicker appt but ds2 was tongue tied and I topped him up with bottles until he'd had it snipped. It didn't impact on breastfeeding. Good luck with getting earlier appt and congrats!!

I had experience of this with DD3. I gave her a bottle for about 5 days Just expressed my milk and gave it to her. She did show a bit of nipple confusion but she overcame that with the added bonus of taking a bottle when needed. I went on to breastfeed for a year.

Bottles are fine to take the pressure off you and your poor nipples. There is no pain like it, I know. I used to bite on a belt to latch her on.

I think I gave a big bottle feed, then when hungry again, a breast feed. I also used formula for a bit in between expressing,as it gave me a chance to rest, and settled DD3.

When you do pump, watch out for mastitis, keep massaging breasts etc. If you get a fever or a red line along your breast get straight to GPs for Abs.

Call your HV/midwife and see if you can get pushed up the list.

Once it is snipped, feeding will feel totally different and you will begin to heal. Hang in there and remember you can only do your best, and in the end as long as your baby is fed, it doesn't really matter how you do it

It's really, really not just about the feeding though.

and yy to lansinoh and jelonet. Do NOT let your nipples dry out, you are aiming for moist wound healing.

Kestryn, what do you mean? Of course it's about feeding.

I know it's about the feeding but see my earlier post. Growing up with a tongue tie meant I found speaking very awkward as a child - ok people could understand me but I often had to repeat things several times & it drove me mad & had a big impact on my confidence - & it wasn't until I was diagnosed & operated on at 11 that I really learnt to talk properly. And it was something I had to learn. Even if Good Vibrations finds other ways to sort out the feeding, it's still worth getting the tie snipped for that.

Oh of course, sorry Kestryn. Yes my GP said it could cause problems with weaning, speech and ice cream licking when older.

I had a slight tongue tie which was snipped by my dentist when I was 6. I still lisp slightly though.

It's shocking that the NHS doesn't seem to regard it as a big deal, and that midwives don't seem to check for it properly.

No problem NT. Yes it's ridiculous isn't it? Mine got diagnosed by a speech therapist. I still can't blow up balloons or stick my tongue out very far.
Licking ice cream has never been a problem though

Hi

Dd had quite a severe tongue tie. I was told they wouldn't cut it so ended up giving up breastfeeding only to be told she could have it cut after all. Dd was mix fed until 3m which isn't great but better than nothing. Push for her to get it cut asap.

To reassure you the actual procedure is so quick - literally a snip with a pair of scissors and it didn't bleed and she only cried for a few seconds.

Oh OP, that sounds horrendous, you poor love. Congratulations on your DD though!

FWIW I can reassure you that, if nipple shields are accepted by your DD, then they won't impact bf. The modern ones are so thin that your nipples should still get adequate stimulation (so my unusually clued up HV told me). And its only for a week (hopefully less if you can get an earlier appointment), so even if there were a slight drop in supply, it could soon be built up again.

Alternatively, you could express for a week and bottle feed. So long as you do it at least every 3 hours (including at least one or two night expressing sessions), again, it shouldn't impact your supply too much. The whole nipple/teat confusion thing has, I believe, been largely disproved now anyway.

DD1 didn't have tongue tie, but she did struggle with bf. She was bottle fed in SCBU for a week, then we used nipple shields and also expressed bm in bottle for about 4 months. I still fed her for 12 months. No confusion between bottle/teat at all.

DD2 had a mild tongue tie, which we got snipped at 6 weeks (the actual procedure is so quick, its really not a problem at all; in fact DD2 had a feed and a sleep straight afterwards). But, she would never ever accept nipple shields/a bottle etc (unfortunately for me), so direct bf her, for 12 months as well.

Don't be scared to use whatever helps, you can't possibly go on like you are.

I bottlefed (formula) alongside bfing while in hospital and gradualy reduced the quantities of bottle until I was exculsively breastfeeding again after about 3 weeks. She then refused a bottle when I tried again at about 5 months. So a bottle ime needn't impact too much on your breastfeeding.

Thanks so much everyone. I've managed to get a cancellation appointment for Friday after a lot of pestering (and tears, though they were very real!).

Kestryn so sorry to hear about your late diagnosis. It is appalling that they don't routine check for it at birth. If I hadn't breastfed I wouldn't have been aware of it at all

NT I know what you mean about biting down on a belt, I actually screamed out loud last night the pain was so intense

Ok, just 3 more nights to go.

Am also going to try a bottle. I think I can feed off one side myself every other feed or every 3rd feed. The other side I can't touch (milk leaks out of parts of the nipple that they shouldn't as the cuts are so deep )

Thanks again, it really helps to hear from you all

GoodVibrations - great news just a shame they don't have a time machine to snip it at birth!