I HATE people who give in to their kids screaming!

[eastendgirl]

I have a friend who has a 3 year old who always ends up giving in to his screaming, she will say at the beginning "no, no, you cannot have that" and will end up giving him a biscuit, or lots of attention, or a cuddlle. Why cannot some women bear to let their children cry and scream? My friend says that he screams and shouts because it is his character, and that he is not able to stop by himself. I think he does because it is in his interest to do so and he hasn't learnt to control himself because she always butts in, and doing so is fostering dependency. I am seeing her less and less these days because we cannot have a conversation without him butting in. Let them cry I say, so they learn to control themselves and become more independent. Anyone wants to join in?

Incidentally we have to use pretty much pure behaviourism with ds1- and done properly it is very powerful (and all the things that claim not to be behaviourism that I have come across are still employing reinforcement so in my book are actually behavioural- even Alfie Kohn or whatever he's called).

DS3 sounds very similar to the OP's friend's child, and I can vouch that in his case it really is his character. Now he;s started nursery they say he's lovely but very willfull, which just about sums him up I'd say.

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juuule - 9 WOW