Name regret...

[Lyndsey8880]

Hi all,
I had my baby in a whirlwind at 30+3 back in July.
Completely unexpected spontaneous labour and spent 6 long weeks in the NICU.
We had a few names, but for about a week he was 'boy'

Then it came to me being discharged...
I said to my partner that I'm not leaving him alone and nameless - but none of the names we picked seemed to work, so we randomly chose Isaac and that was that.

Fast forward to now, 16 weeks + 5 days actual age. Out of the NICU for 10 weeks.
I suddenly noticed i wasnt saying his name or calling him by his name, and then realised that actually... i dont think I like the name at all, i dont think I like the sound of the name, and it really doesnt suit him.

So now im in the dilemma of thinking up other names (he reminds of a rough and tumble type of kid!) Or whether im being silly and his name will grow to be him

But I feel this real disconnect with the name. I love my son with all my heart, he's a character, and a fighter, but the name just doesnt feel right.

Anyone ever had this and eventually loved the name and thought yes its the one?

Or anyone ever changed their child's name?

(I know its easy to do within the first year.. just keen to hear thoughts!)

I have some names i think suit him much more...
Remy
Frankie
Bobby

A bit old school bruiser type names.
But then a name is just a name!

Sorry you had such a terrible time when your baby boy was born. The thought of having to separate from my babies when they were so young is just unimaginable, I struggled if I was ever in a different room to them.
I can't help with the name regret feelings but maybe wait a bit longer and if you still don't like it, just change it don't worry what others might think.

But also to say, I do think of Frankie and Bobby as quite 'bruiser' names or rather either a Glasweigen or East End gangster name! How about Vinny, Stanley or Ronnie (Vin, Stan, Ron).

Remy, I did think was a French girls name, so definitely no 'bruiser' vibes to me!

Good luck with it all.

Try calling him a nickname instead for a month - Zac, Iggy, Izzy. Sometimes it feels strange to call the baby a name at all and generally takes getting used to using it - don't overthink it and rush into changing it.

I’ve always had a list of names and then chosen once baby was born and picked one that suited them so can’t quite relate. However I think it awful for a parent to not like the name they chose for their child so just change it. The sooner the better!!

It does sound like your name regret might be tied up with a traumatic time for you and not feeling that you were in control or able to make choices.

Isaac is by far the nicest name of those mentioned - it has a classic feel that would suit a lot of different ‘types’ and all ages. Zac is a nice nickname, too.

But that is my opinion…if it’s really not your style at all, or your husband’s, it’s not unreasonable to change it. He’s still so little.

I chose my second son's name (third child) before he was born. I loved the name. It wasn't common but it was a proper name (not like a newish fad-y name if that makes sense, like with a weird spelling).

Then for the first new months I really struggled with it. I just didn't know anyone with the same name apart from one film star (who he was NOT named after!). I thought I'd made it too different.

But, soon after it was just his name. He grew into it, I love it like I did when I was pregnant, and as an almost fully grown man, he really likes his name (more importantly.)

I think it is really hard when it hits you that you have created this person, and now this is their name forever.

As an aside, I love the name Isaac! And has potential nicknames. Give it a bit more time then see how you feel. Could make Isaac his middle name instead.

I think the suggestion of Zach as a diminutive is a good one as you can still keep his full name as Isaac.

Anecdotally, my son’s friend at school is Isaac and he is the most rough and tumble child in the class 😆

I’m also baffled that so many people are saying that Remy is a girl name? 🤷🏻‍♀️ Maybe I’m only so familiar with it as I’m a name nerd but it’s a solidly male, not at all uncommon, French name. In the UK it would surely be a very strange choice to give a girl as we’re so close to France and the child would likely go there at some point.

Has no one else watched Ratatouille? 😅

Isaac is a great name, really love it.

For my ds, I was set on one name for the whole pregnancy, then when he was born it just didn't feel right. We picked a new name and I would say for a good 4 years I still wasn't sure if we had done the right thing. He is older now and hates the other name! So you may find if he gets older, he prefers Isaac too.

What’s his middle name? Could you call him that, or just give him a nickname without actually formally changing his name? Or shorten to Zac?

Frankie and Bobby are cute. Charlie has a similar vibe