Name regret...

[Lyndsey8880]

Hi all,
I had my baby in a whirlwind at 30+3 back in July.
Completely unexpected spontaneous labour and spent 6 long weeks in the NICU.
We had a few names, but for about a week he was 'boy'

Then it came to me being discharged...
I said to my partner that I'm not leaving him alone and nameless - but none of the names we picked seemed to work, so we randomly chose Isaac and that was that.

Fast forward to now, 16 weeks + 5 days actual age. Out of the NICU for 10 weeks.
I suddenly noticed i wasnt saying his name or calling him by his name, and then realised that actually... i dont think I like the name at all, i dont think I like the sound of the name, and it really doesnt suit him.

So now im in the dilemma of thinking up other names (he reminds of a rough and tumble type of kid!) Or whether im being silly and his name will grow to be him

But I feel this real disconnect with the name. I love my son with all my heart, he's a character, and a fighter, but the name just doesnt feel right.

Anyone ever had this and eventually loved the name and thought yes its the one?

Or anyone ever changed their child's name?

(I know its easy to do within the first year.. just keen to hear thoughts!)

I have some names i think suit him much more...
Remy
Frankie
Bobby

A bit old school bruiser type names.
But then a name is just a name!

I think Alyssa & Issac are lovely together.

I think no matter what you had called him, you'd be feeling like this at this point in time.

I wouldn't have been my first choice, but I've met a few few in the past few years and it's really grown on me. I certainly like it a lot more than Remy (especially for a boy) or Frankie. But that's not really relevant because he's not my baby!!

I do think you've been through a terrible terrible time & some therapy might help you to come to terms with what you've been through and also his name.

Would your daughter find it unsettling to have his name changed? Do you think? Might she want to change her or might she then be worried you might change hers??

I love the meaning of Isaac, it means “he will laugh” and “he will rejoice” both such positive associations to the name, laughter, joy and happiness in one bundle of fun!

How about Zachary? So an extension of the name Isaac, so keeping his history of his birth and taking it forward in a positive way?

Isa is a Scottish name, and very much a female one - usually short for Isabel. To be honest, once you've said 'Isa', it's hardly any more effort to add the 'c' sound on the end.

Same here - not proud and not that I like to dwell on it, but if I hear 'Remy', I also think back to the 80s and the horrible slur used for children in the 'remedial' class, or just generally those considered not very intelligent.

Obviously, this won't be a thing for many younger parents now; and certainly not the newborn children who are being named.

I wouldn't personally associate 'rem' with 'rim', but I guess it depends a lot on your accent and how the vowels are pronounced.

Worry can become a bad habit and now that he is safe and well maybe this is something to focus on. Before you ties yourself up in knots I would suggest counselling.

Honestly I don’t LOVE any of my kids names, I was in my 20’s having them and now I’m 50 I would chose differently but it makes no difference to them. Isaac will like his name and his life once his mom is ok. Steady yourself before changing anything x

Remy/Remi sounds boyish to me! Reminds me of the French books/movies Rémi Sans Famille. But then again, I didn’t grow up in the UK, so things might be different here.

I think you should maybe give it a bit of time and see if Isaac grows on you, if not, then definitely change it to something you and your partner like better xx

I think all the names you picked, including Isaac, are lovely

I love the name Isaac and love Zac even more. But if neither you nor your dh like it and if you are having trouble with it then you should change it.

I'd take a minute if I were you and not rush it. Imagine he doesn't have a name at all and then the two of you should do a few lists of names you'd love to use.

I think Isaac is lovely but I think you should change it. Keep Isaac in his names and add another unless that would make it ridiculously long. It'll always be part of his story. If he wants to go by Isaac instead when he is older, accept that with good grace.

I love Remy. It may have been extended to some girls recently but it's still a boys' name.

I changed my daughter’s name. I’m very very glad I did

I always loved Rolf and Jimmy...

Or what about Russell?

Isaac is lovely, but if it’s not feeling right it’s fine to change it. It’s still very early.

Remy is primarily a boy’s name in the UK, used sometimes for girls (more so in the US). In France it’s definitely only for boys. It’s a standalone name, not traditionally from Jeremiah. Also a lovely name (the issues a couple of posters have suggested seem very specific to region and a particular time which won’t be relevant to babies born now). Frankie is also a great choice.

Isa is an old lady name
I think its probably short for something but no idea what.

Remy - makes me think of the Royal Electrical & Mechanical Engineers - REME.

Frankie and Bobby are both quite soft and can both be used for girls.

Both Bobby's I grew up with are now Bobs.

I think Issac will grow on you, is there a middle name that you could use?

Yes, change the name. Isaac is a handsome name but you don't like it.

Start again with lists. Give yourselves a time limit.

Ideas ..
Robert
Bruce
Zebedee
Elliott
Elio
Bruno
David
Scott
Winston
Adam
Leo
Rohan

What about Elliott or Zachary?

Isabel.

I'm sure it's just 'a me thing', but if I knew/met somebody called Elio, I would permanently have the old song going through my head all day (as I now have from just reading it here) - "The big ship sails on the Eli-Elio, Eli-Elio, Eli-Elio"

Another traumatic birth here - we decided on the name as I was rushed into theatre because I wasn't sure I was going to make it. It was my preferred one from our shortlist, but wasn't something I'd definitely decided on. After 3 months in NICU he was home and it turned out that his name which is common where I'm from was really not known where I live, and it completely threw me. I worried for ages about his name, hated that I was so sure about DS1's name and so unsure about DS2. Now he's 3 and it's definitely his name, but I honestly don't know if the worry I had was just trauma related or I would have been equally happy had I changed his name. I probably would have changed it if I had a definite one to change it to. I'd try out a different name for a bit at home and see what you feel. For what it's worth, Issac is a lovely name!

I've only heard that one as "alley-alley-oh". Maybe you are much posher than I am.

I like Isaac. It's a strong name. Don't like any of the others you've given . Any more ideas ?

Thanks that one has puzzled me for years. 😂
I'd often thought along the lines of Ina as in Jamesina etc but that didn't make sense. Never consider Isabel.

Change it but not to Remy, the only Remy I’ve ever heard of is a rat.

Remo?

Definitely not!