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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to hate the term 'the baby'

78 replies

susia · 20/09/2008 22:50

It seems bizarre to me but probably being unreasonable that people refer to their baby as 'the baby' rather than their name especially if they have only one.

Someone I know has a baby/child of nearly two and still refers to him as the baby. I feel like saying 'do you mean xxx?'

But think its just me being irritable and intolerant!

OP posts:

Ceolas · 20/09/2008 22:54

I found it weird to begin with, but the youngest child in DH's family is always referred to as 'the baby'.

Sometimes I say it myself, but only if I'm talking to someone who doesn't know me/my family very well.

GobbledigookisThrifty · 20/09/2008 22:54

Even worse when people just refer to them as 'baby', as if that's their name!

Original poster

susia · 20/09/2008 22:55

don't mind it so much when it's the youngest. Its when its the only child that I think it's strange. Like the child has no name/personality or something.

OP posts:

thumbwitch · 20/09/2008 22:57

A tad U, I think - each to their own. It would matter more if the child was older, maybe - probably about the time when they can answer back themselves that they "am not a baby, am a big boy/girl now" (no idea what age that is)

Original poster

susia · 20/09/2008 22:58

yes think it's me, feeling in a very unreasonable mood. It just annoys me along with almost everything today.

OP posts:

wilkos · 20/09/2008 22:58

its not really worth worrying about, is it?

mindalina · 20/09/2008 22:59

Am I the person you know? I do this. I know he's not really a baby anymore but he's not really a proper child yet either.

RGPargy · 20/09/2008 23:00

I refer to DD as "the baby" sometimes, but more when there's alot of noise going on with DS and i have to say "ffs, ssssshhhh!!! You'll wake the baby!!!" (DS is 18!).

Having said that, i dont say it so often now, but i more when DD was younger.

misselizabethbennett · 20/09/2008 23:00

I think it's quite sweet when you are talking about an actual baby. I did it even though I only had one child. He'd been 'the baby' for 9 months so it was a hard habit to break.

Plus, if I was passing the baby to a friend or relative, I'd often say 'hold this for a minute'.

Remotew · 20/09/2008 23:00

UANBU, My inlaws referred to my DD as the baby instead of her name, peed me off now end.

iliketosleep · 20/09/2008 23:01

YANBU as it annoys YOU but we call 3 week old DD3 "the baby" "her" or "she" as it still sounds very new and weird calling her Brooke after 9 months of calling her the baby, her and she.

Although calling a 2 year old the baby is a bit OTT i think.

TrinityRhino · 20/09/2008 23:02

I do say it about gecko sometimes

but we do have three girls and its not often
like ssshh you'll wake the baby
and wheres the baby?

that last one doesn;y sound good does it

iliketosleep · 20/09/2008 23:02

sorry misselizabethbennett x posts.

I went to school with an elizabeth bennett, not anything to do with the post but a coincidence

sorry

Ceolas · 20/09/2008 23:04

Actually, I do agree with iliketosleep. It took me a few weeks to get used to calling each of my children by name when they were born. They all needed to 'grow into' their names!

SlartyBartFast · 20/09/2008 23:06

simple baby annoys me too, at my friends wedding her baby was referred to by her mother all the time as baby.... annoying.

misselizabethbennett · 20/09/2008 23:07

iliketosleep - of course it's Mrs Darcy now!

Original poster

susia · 20/09/2008 23:09

yes think its just what some people do. To me it seems like after about 3 months they have a personality so have a name (even before that).

OP posts:

iliketosleep · 20/09/2008 23:10

Yup although we use her and she mostly in sentences like...

"I wish she would stop crying"
"she cant be hungry AGAIN!!!"
"she needs her nappy changed"

although there is

"dp will you feed the baby"
"dp will you change the babys nappy"

and my favourite....

"dp get up and sort the baby out please im soooo tired"

tortoiseshell · 20/09/2008 23:12

We have called all of ours 'the boy' and 'the girl'. I quite like it - 'is the boy awake?'

wahwah · 21/09/2008 10:18

Guilty, guilty. It does me a while to feel that they've grown into their names, until then 'baby' or 'the boy/girl' does very well. Sorry if it annoys anyone, but then I am probablyunreasonably irritated by your child's given name too. Lillyellamollimilliepoppydaisierosieboo En Suite Bathroom gets my goat every time.

thescurvysockmonsterofdoom · 21/09/2008 10:32

I can tell you exactley what age I am not a baby my a big girl hapens, it is exactley 2.5 or last week for dd2. she is not my baby anymore, but I have always referred to her as baby.

SmugColditz · 21/09/2008 10:38

I often refer to mine as "BIg one" and "Little one"

Or "boy" and "small boy"

Cos it doesn't matter. They know I love them and know their names. They call me mummy but it doens't negate my name.

SmugColditz · 21/09/2008 10:39

They grow into their names when they respond properly to them, and for some this is not until they are roughly 35

SmugColditz · 21/09/2008 10:39

And

My dad still calls me Bunty

Peachy · 21/09/2008 10:40

I use the term

Its becuase I have so many boys, I cant remeber whic name goes well

Alo guilty of shouting 'Oi Boys!' raher than names- far easier

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