Is it rude to talk over someone?

[Fortheloveofpenguins]

I don’t mean if it’s an emergency, or if you want to clarify something before someone gives more information (eg you’re talking about Jim and they want to check which Jim it relates to). I also don’t mean if it’s an accident and you don’t realise they haven’t finished speaking, and I don’t mean a situation where you’re very short on time. Also assume the person doesn’t have additional needs. This just relates to having a normal conversation in a relaxed situation.

YANBU: given the above caveats, it is rude to start talking over someone who was clearly part way through a sentence
YABU: it is always fine to talk over someone if you want to say something

What did your parents teach you?

I'm surprised you're asking after all those caveats.

My husband does this all the time. Drives. Me.nuts.
im so tired for various reasons and I’ve tried explaining that not only is it rude but it distracts my chain of thought and I forget what I’m talking about and have to start again. He does it with other people too, I’ve started saying “ let x finish “ as I’m so fed up with it. He’s usually wrong in guessing what I’m going to say anyway.

It’s rude, if someone is saying a sentence, you can wait until they’ve finished it.

It's so common these days, I don't think kids are taught the etiquette of conversation like we used to be.

I vaguely remember desperately trying to tell my Gran her pan of boiling milk was overflowing and my Mum kept ssshing me not to interrupt adults talking 😆.

Totally rude. So is picking up and looking at your phone. And so is turning away from someone who is mid sentance. You may not be interested in what they are saying but wait til they finish saying it!

Depends. The consensus will be it’s rude, but if it’s someone who drones on and on, sometimes it’s just got to be done.

I have a friend who does this and raises her voice at the same time to drown out everyone else. Drives me nuts.

Also had an aquaintance who used to repeat the last bit of your sentence before replying. It was most odd.

Maybe your kids aren’t but mine are. This is an issue I experience with adults more than kids so I don’t think it’s a new teaching issue

Yes its rude.
However I seem to hear a lot of supposed conversations these days where people are literally talking at the same time as each other. Not listening to each other. I find it really weird. Btw it's not that im deliberately listening in but because I'm nearly always by myself and I don't wear headphones or similar it's impossible not to hear how other people interact.

Overall, I do think it is rude. However, some people drone on and 'talk at you' as a defensive way of stopping you from contributing your point of view.

I had an issue today where I was explaining an issue to someone who deals with medical complaints and they were monologing at me. I had to interrupt, constantly, to try and put my case forward. It was exhausting and fruitless

Yes but I know two people (work colleague and mother in law) who if you don’t interrupt won’t let you get a word in. Even when you do speak though they aren’t really listening, just waiting for you to stop so they can talk about themselves.

Obviously it's rude

Don't think this warrants a vote do you

This is quite common, I agree. People taking past each other and not listening to each other

It’s one of the traits I hate most, along with standing in a group with your back to someone. Really angers me, it feels like total disdain.

routinely repeating the last bit of the sentence is often a sign of neurodivergence. It is called echolalia. It helps with language processing difficulties.

And, actually, interuppting is also a sign of neurodivergence.

but obviously yes, talking over someone/interrupting is normally considered rude.

Of course it’s rude for anyone to talk over someone who is speaking - it’s the most basic of manners

Trouble is, I find so many people waffle on and on and take ages to get to the point, I’ve already worked out what’s happened and got bored of the conversation but they keep droning on.

I have to bite my tongue and keep looking interested as I am polite though.

I have to stop myself saying, “skip to the end”

I’m surprised I’m asking too. I’m glad to see I’m in the majority so far.

Obviously I do

I have a friend who does this and it drives me mental, I’ll be half way through a sentence and she’ll just butt in with her own story. Once she’s finished she’ll say “oh sorry freckle carry on”. She also finishes sentences with what she thinks happened and most of the time it’s wrong. I’m quite quiet so in a group what I was saying just gets lost and I give up!

Yes. Though I had a friend where our conversations involved her talking 75% of the time, me talking 75% of the time and both of us being happy.

It is rude but I do it. Sometimes I don’t realise I’m doing it. Sometimes I don’t pick up the cues.

I know it’s rude and if I realise I’ve done it I apologise.

Conversely in my family, my teenager does not do this, my mother does. She believes that asking a question is conversation, you are not given space to answer it so she’ll answer it herself or just carry on talking. My teenager is rightly very vocal with me and her father if she feels we are interrupting ( she’s not with her grandma as it’s pointless).

I quite agree.

When I was a postgrad one of the men in the group used to talk over me. One day I said "Chris this is the third time today youv'e interrupted or talked over me. Don't do t again."

He never did.