To hate the pressure for facial injections

[TrickNotTreats]

Virtually all of my friends and family members (youngest are my nieces in mid twenties!) have Botox/fillers etc .

Everyone is asking me (or trying to give me friendly advice/recommendations) why I don’t. Being nice about it telling me I’d look better and that they just want to help me .

Am I really that odd to not be getting this done? I’m 43 and yes I have a few little lines (and apparently loss of volume round eyes thanks SIL for pointing that out !) but they aren’t that bad and also if relevant I’m autistic and I really hate change I think if I made even slight tweaks to my face I’d hate it and feel panicky! I also have sensory issues and if it feels weird I’d hate it!

Still it’s constant they keep saying to get it done. At family gatherings it’s now the number one topic of conversation who has had what done, the latest things they are into. They all look amazing but I feel a bit ‘odd one out’ and struggle to join in conversations!

Each to their own I know but it’s become like a cult and they want to recruit me. Sometimes it knocks my confidence a little but not enough for me to do it.

Dreading over Xmas the conversations and comparisons and inevitable ‘you should get Botox/tear trough filler/lip filler etc’

Personally I'd just be blunt and tell them that I'm not afraid of natural ageing, thanks very much.

Gosh, they sound boring. I get some tweaks, I think maybe some of my friends do, plenty don't (as far as I can tell), but no one sits around at every gathering discussing it. It's just not that interesting.

Just don't join in the conversation. If they ask or make recommendations, you don't have to explain or justify yourself. Just say "it doesn't interest me". Just only ever say that, don't be drawn further. Hopefully they'll get bored and the conversation can move on.

This has NEVER happened to me, so I’m not sure if my input is useful beyond saying it’s really really not normal for everyone. I don’t know anyone in my very very large family or friends who have done any “work” beyond reconstruction after surgery. Why would you even want to stick poison in your face? The results aren’t what you want.

I just use the, what seems unheard of these days, word no

You cant blame anyone else for not using it

Your family is just weird. Precisely one of my large family gets Botox and she’s known throughout the family these days as Pokerface.

I’d skip these gatherings as they sound really dull? Hang out with some more interesting friends?

Also, never happened to me. I'd say change your social circle, but you can't choose your family.

I do know people who've had tweakments (you might do too batshit, but you're not aware), but nobody has ever encouraged me to do so.

I’d rather spend my money on other things which make me happy.

Plus I have had more than enough of anything medical in the past ten years.

It is a sad state of affairs that normal faces aren’t considered good enough.

You’ve got to tell them to stop asking you about this.

Be blunt “I’m not interested in having anything done, so stop asking me.”

Aside from the pressure (which is obviously not on), I couldn’t bear to spend my precious time with people whose only topic of conversation is tweakments, or appearance in general; how boring 😔 I hope they tire of the topic eventually and move on to something more interesting.

Yanbu

Loads of people will say ohhhhh aging is a privilege.

They clearly dont work in my sector. LOOKING in your 40s let alone 50s is a crime.
There are vanishing few men who look anything other than refreshed early 40s let alone women.
I am fairly indifferent and held out until 40 i view it as "cost of doing business" when I leave in 5 yrs or so I wont bother.

A few weeks back My 4 yr old asked me why a lady had a needle in her face. I asked what she meant and she said "a dr needle. its on a shop"

I then explained (which frankly was edifying)

Tldr.
They trick people into thinking theres something wrong with them wheb theres not so they spend lots of money. Then they are stuck and have to keep going back and spending more money.

she cried.

I will say friends / network etc rarely discuss it/ don't discuss it

I get botox and wouldn't dream of saying this to anybody! Ive made suggestions to people who have asked me "what would you get if you were me" etc but never ever unsolicited. That is SO rude.

You just need to be very blunt with people like this, because they are being blunt to you.

Just say "I'm happy with my face as it is thanks, I think there's something nice about aging naturally" that should shut them up.

Once you start getting into your fifties all bets are off as everything loses volume. My eyes are screwed literally as my once perfect eyesight is no more, so loss of volume takes second place to lack of eyesight. Similarly my neck is now hanging and crepey but I’ve got issues with my TMJD so the look of my neck is now taking second priority to needing to pay for neck adjustments. And so it goes on.

It’s the circle of people you’re in. I’m 46 and never felt under pressure to have anything done. No one I know ever talks about it. I mean they might have had things done, I don’t know, but it’s never mentioned.

I feel like I’ve become a project to them almost I feel like every time I see anyone they are trying to persuade me I should have it done. Nobody can seem to understand that I know I could look a bit better / more rested / a little younger but I don’t want to feel or look different and it’s not something I think about that much and they just seem confused ! They do all look great but I couldn’t risk it - I’d be the one who ended up with a droopy wonky eye or a reaction or something !

Everyone in my work place has “work done” but no one has suggested I do (I’m sure they think it lol). Just say “please stop asking me about this- I do not want anything done and never will thank you”.
Then if anyone continues to bring it up you can say “you know my view on this, let’s change the subject”.

They are very rude!

I am 54. Done nothing, will do nothing. No pressure from anyone.No one in my circle does it.
.Find better friends. Tell family to shut it.

It’s a personal choice and they should respect your choice to not want to have tweakments.
just say it’s not something you want to do and you won’t be changing your mind.
i do have Botox but part of the appeal is no one knowing!

I find people like that incredibly dull and quite frankly rude. To be so obsessed with appearances is sad and shows a real lack
of confidence on their side. I’d have to snap back and tell them that the lines on my face aren’t anything to do with anyone else. Have you listened to Kate winslet and her opinion of society pressure for cosmetic surgery? I’d steal some of her statements and I’d most likely make them feel quite uncomfortable but that’s exactly what they’re doing to you. Tell them to bore off. What they do is up to them but piss off commenting on anyone else

These people are weird, boring and rude!
Shut the conversation down, walk away if necessary.

Your family and friends are being rude, at best, making such comments to you, and persistently.

You could try the broken record technique, eg

’I don’t want to do that, I won’t be doing that’ & change the subjecy (then don’t get drawn into discussion about your reasons)

‘Please don’t give me unsolicited, negative feedback about my appearance / suggestions about procedures’

’You’re repeatedly commenting on my face and suggesting things I could do. Please stop it’

Just tell them that you don't want to feel or look different.
Do they know you are autistic? If they do then they should understand this statement from you and they should back off politely

You don't have to be autistic to not want to shoot your face full of plastic. That doesn't have to be the reason.

My friends and family are not like this

Rest assured in 20 years time when they have really weird faces you will look perfectly normal

They sound as deep as puddles.

YANBU, it's a them problem, not a you problem. Tell them to stop being rude and trying to make you into their pet project.