My parents have become insufferable.

[PleasePleasePleaseDontProve]

I am really struggling with my parents. Both are mid-sixties, retired. It seems since retirement they have become quite bigoted, insufferable and insular in their viewpoints. Every time I meet up with them conversations revolve around:

• Illegal immigration / people on benefits / Reform and Nigel Farage. Essentially focussing around the latest GB news story (which they watch religiously).
• Their latest or ongoing health ailments and how poor, in their view, the NHS is.
• Unnecessary and rude descriptions to describe other people (could be random strangers) or people they know. For example, ‘our fat neighbour has put on tons of weight.’

I used to have a fantastic relationship with my parents, particularly my father, and I’m sure he wasn’t always like this. I’m starting to dislike meeting up with them as their attitudes seem to have changed towards life and people in general, and they constantly want to discuss the latest GB News story.

Has anybody else found this has happened to their parents?

I’m mid 60’s. I’ve never watched News GB, and if anything I’ve become more relaxed, and less judgmental!

I’m commenting because I’m fascinated to see the replies you get.
I do wonder if the filter just isn’t in action any more. My dad has a great relationship with a number of asylum seekers who he’d class as family, but then will have a similar attitude to your parents about immigration in the next breath. It’s wearing but I’m not going to judge him harshly for his crappy comments. He’s spent years being a tolerant human being while out in public. He’s not long for this world and he’s not publicly calling for flogging and violence against anyone.

This perfectly describes my parents too, in early 70s. They can be so mean about how people look and they do it on front of the DC too so I’m always having to correct them which then goes down very badly.
You have my sympathy as it’s exhausting and puts me on edge! I just limit contact now because what’s the point!

Blimey, DH and I are in our sixties and we're not a bit like that I hope

My 90 year old parents - now they are just like that, very much so. And yes, they are insufferable and I have to limit contact. I think it's a personality thing though, not an age thing.

My dad is late sixties and he now holds these same views, not sure what he was like prior to finishing work but his life is definitely more insular than it used to be. He is also an avid watcher of GB news and spends a lot of time watching videos on YouTube that follow the same theme as the points you've made. My mum tries to stay neutral/doesn't hold the same views (neither do I) but it's got to the point where she just ignores him or leaves the room so as not to cause an argument. I've noticed he also talks 'at' people rather than with them, I.e. he isn't interested in any opinions other than ones that agree with him. I feel bad describing him in this way, as he is also funny/kind/generous etc.. but I have noticed exactly what you've described surface over the last couple of years.

Wait till they get to their 80s, every ailment is a frigging competition!!

How do you respond to your parents views and opinions?
Do debate/discuss or say nothing?

I'm even older and have a much more relaxed and tolerant attitude to things now, I think it's just life experience, and the inability to have much control over things. I do have a rant now and then about traffic, crowds, the cost of living and so on, but that's when I'm talking to my friend - the mirror lol.

I don't think watching GB News is very good for the mental health tbh - so it could be that.
But it might just be their age/experience of life too? Eg I have had terrible (really dreadful) experiences with the NHS in respect of my (now passed on) parents towards the end of their lives. So your parents may not be being unreasonable there.
Re immigration: 51% of the population think immigration is the biggest issue facing our country according to YouGov. That can't all be from people watching GB News.
Just nod and hmmm at them, if you like, but don't necessarily dismiss real issues as bigotry.

They've been radicalised by GB News and the Daily Mail.

Get them referred to Prevent.

Debate? Christ, life is too short for that effort. I just say “oh, ok then”.

We are early 70s and certainly not like that. Do your parents do anything with their time?
When we retired we made a decision to not watch the TV till 6.30pm, and keep as active as possible, I volunteer two days a week whilst my husband does most of the housework, we look after a granddaughter once a week and as it has been such a lovely summer gone camping most weekends or camped in the garden.
We laugh and have fun and make the most of life.

Jesus, we get one of these every week.

i don't think lifes to short for communicating and discussing anything with family.

I might ask them what they've been watching lately, what news sources they get and why they believe them.

I agree though OP, my parents too were once the polar opposite of this. it's hard.

I’m starting to think these threads are started just to start name calling against people who go against the Left’s views.

I am in my sixties and am a bleeding heart liberal lefty.

My mother on the other hand has held the disgusting and ignorant views you describe, and exhibited similar behaviour since I can remember.

We are completely NC.

@HelpMeGetThrough Yep, no one else is allowed to be unwell, my Dad is always much, much worse!😂

@PleasePleasePleaseDontProve You can try to offer other points of view, but if they won't listen to them, all you can do is decide how much of their company you can tolerate from now on. I let a lot of what my Dad says wash over me, but he's late 80's so I'm not going to limit contact at this pointm because I don't have much time left with him (and he can be lovely).

It doesn’t get any easier . My parents are in the 70s and it’s the all the same. I’m sick of hearing the doom and gloom of it all .

My much younger friend became like this during a period of unemployment when she started watching GB News on a loop, despite having been fairly liberal before - it was like an addiction. Back in work and back to normal now!

Maybe it’s because the older someone is, the more they will notice the difference between now and ‘the good old days’.

I asked AI what are the top 3 issues in the UK right now. It said:

Economy, NHS, immigration.

They need to get busy

Mid 60s is quite young, but if they are behaving like old people, maybe they are living old people's life. They need to be active, to travel, even volunteer if they want.

Retiring is fantastic, but only if you do something with yourself.

Busy and active people are happy and don't have time or care to be bitchy about others.

You’re not wrong.

As far as my mother is concerned, if you had a black cat, she’d have a blacker bugger. Everything is a competition.

With my mum, at that relatively young age, I would have the argument.

I would say to them, you taught me right from wrong, fact from fiction, not to moan and whinge (or whatever they did teach you). These days you are a right pair of Debbie Downers. I challenge you to block GB news off your TV for six months and watch some proper news - whatever you like as long as it’s not Russia Today or Fox or any of the other propaganda channels. Offer to block it for them, I found instructions on how to do it by googling. If they will accept the challenge, do it and see if things improve.

Prople love to believe they are too clever to be manipulated but we aren’t. None of us are. GB Pablum is an unadulterated stream of shite beamed straight in to our brains. Don’t accept it.

I think retirement can have a negative effect in this way if you don't make an effort to get out into the world- if you just watch TV news all day and have no counter-balancing experience then that will change your views of the world. It's not age in itself (although age-related cognitive decline of course doesn't help- not everyone has that though)- it's the result of getting all your information about the world from a single source.