Licking dinner plates

[Endlessblueskieswhatsnottolove]

Recently my 8 year old has started licking her dinner plate when she's finished. Whilst I appreciate it when she says it's because it was delicious, I've told her not to do it as it's yucky and bad manners.
Dh thinks I'm being harsh on her for getting cross with her

Aibu to not want my child to think it's ok to lick plates after finishing their food?!

I kind of agree with this, as long as she knows this is something you do just at home, not to be done at restaurants/other people's houses and I am pretty sure she does know this at her age. My daughter behaves very differently at home comapred to say a restaurant. But I think bread is better than licking anyway!

I have never understood licking plates and thankfully I’ve never seen someone do it in real life.

If the gravy is that good go get some bread. Don’t become a slobbering animal.

I understand what you're saying but I think a lot of people would find it quite unpleasant to have to watch others in their family licking plates. There's a reason we don't do it anywhere else, and that reason is that most people would think 'Ewww' - in the same way they'd think 'Ewww' about someone eating a roast dinner with their fingers or chewing with their mouth open. It's just the sort of thing that, for a lot of people, will trigger a natural disgust response, even in the home. It's not a logical thing, it's more visceral. So for that reason I would say that it's perfectly reasonable to tell a child they can't do it at home, out of consideration for the rest of the family (or in this case, the OP, as her DH doesn't mind apparently).

You could say she needs to ask first or only do it with you, if you're concerned about her doing it out? Not a bad thing really, as learning that certain behaviour is ok sometimes/with certain people, and wrong other times, is important.

Rightly or wrongly if she does this in public she will be judged as having the table manners of a chimpanzee, so unless your husband is trying to set her up for people reacting to her with revulsion and condemnation, better to knock it on the head now.

My dad does this. I really don’t see the big deal. He only does it at home/within other family member’s house

My mum prefers a slice of cheap white bread to soak up the rest of the gravy.

Actually yes, when the stuff you're licking is really, really good, and too good to waste. Only in the privacy of my home, though.

You’re right to teach her not to do that, it’s bad manners and she will be judged harshly if she does this in public.

it’s not okay even in the privacy of her home.

I was very firmly taught not to dip bread in soup and taught my DS the same, only for his very uncouth aunt to loudly remonstrate with me and call me a snob for stopping him from doing it at a wedding.

Our dogs would be very disappointed as that is their job in our house. 😉

I did it at infant school and had to sit on the dining room floor with my legs crossed and my hands on my head for the rest of the lunch break.

My very relaxed mum had chosen to turn a blind eye to it at home and I genuinely didn't know it was unacceptable 🫣

Oh I dip bread in soup-lovely!

I draw the line at licking plates though!

Grim. I would be shocked if I had another child over for dinner and they did this and yes, I would judge the parents.

You can't dip bread in soup?!

You're playing fast and loose with the word traumatise there @Bez72

I think you were being mildly ironic, but you never know these days!

I do this but ONLY if I’m alone. Luckily; I live alone so I’ll lick as many dinner plates and drink out of as many cartons and lick my knives as much as I damn well please. Mum taught me it was bad manners so I do not do this in company of others.

I don't see how it's yucky, but it is bad manners.
Just tell her you don't want to see/hear that, and she can mop the end up with bread.

It’s not ok.

but I’d do it if no one was around 😈

Licking plates is revolting, use bread for goodness sake. It’s not something that would have been tolerated in our home and the plate would have been removed if any of my children had done that.

Bizarre!

I think it's fine as long as she knows to only do it at home.

I totally agree with this (i'm an 80's child so bread was also a staple with any meal).

I used to always 'Mop up' with some bread but, never with my tongue - sounds pretty gross!

How so?

I wouldn't have allowed it but I wouldn't have got cross. I would have explained that table manners are about being considerate towards people we are eating with. Bread is your friend.

Really? Is it really going to traumatise her? Hyperbolic language is the worst.

OP, its disgusting and poor manners. Tell her not to and when she starts to ask for the plate.

Or, as other poorly mannered people have said let her carry on and then wonder why in a restaurant or public setting she can't figure out that having good manners is necessary.

Yeah but licking knives is also about not cutting your tongue.