DD9 doesn’t like any physical activity

[plaicematt]

AIBU to keep signing her up for things?

Hobbies-wise she’s in choir, Brownies and currently tutoring for 11+ next year. She does swimming but just for the skill rather than exercise if you see what I mean. She doesn’t like any other sport/exercise that we’ve tried.

Over the years she’s done a term here and there of football, cricket, gymnastics and a couple of types of dance but not enjoyed any of them. She has never wanted to learn to ride a bike or scooter. I have two other DC who love all types of sport and can’t sit still so I’m not sure what to do.

She’s got some puppy fat - not sure if this is normal puberty or if due to her low levels of exercise. This puts her just into the overweight band for BMI for her age. She’s tall so she carries it well. I almost can’t believe I’m talking about a 9yo’s weight.

So, AIBU to keep signing her up for sports and getting her moving when she clearly doesn’t want to? And any advice?

Have your DD checked out for Diabetes and heart and lung health.
If healthy just keep her in the excellent sport of swimming and incidental movement like walking, climbing etc.
Let her try all new sports as they present themselves.
I would buy her a bicycle and teach her to ride. That is a skill worth having.

I thought it was just me that hated all sports! Only thing I ever liked was running round at the park on the swings and the slide - I still like that if the equipment's sturdy enough and nobody's there.
Does she like doing that? Good luck.

Diabetes??? @user1492757084 that’s quite a reach.

Yoga? Would be a lovely balance to 11plus work

Exactly what I was going to say.

Diabetes ? No signs of that.
She has clearly said she doesn’t want a bike.

Do walks together every day. Also do your local junior park run every week.
i would try again with cycling, its a life skill -I find it a great family activity I can do with my three boys.
go swimming with her for exercise a few times a week and do lengths /widths /races together

I don't like sport but I'm very active. Forcing her into something she doesn't like won't be helpful. Do more swimming. Walk everywhere but don't frame it as exercise, just getting where you need to go or getting some fresh air. Do days out that are active, water parks, climbing centre, trampolining. Even days out that include walking like theme parks, national trust properties etc.

Agree with PP that weight is much more related to what she eats than exercise.

So she has a healthy diet, but maybe cut her portion size down a little - are you unconsciously giving her the same as her more active siblings? I find myself serving equal portions sometimes without thinking, even though that isn’t right for my family’s different sizes/metabolisms. She sounds like she will finish her plate even if she’s full before that iyswim, so try a smaller portion and she may find that’s enough.

You mentioned she’s approaching the 11+, I think if you pick a school with plenty of sports options on the timetable/clubs that may help, as it will seem normal to do sports and exercise and it may become attractive to her as a sociable thing.

Having said that, I do agree with pp that team sports are not for everyone (I hated them too) and the important thing is physical activity of some kind rather than sport. I really wish schools were less fixated on team ball sports and had more opportunities to try other things.

Another vote for martial arts. Some styles of karate, such as Shotokan, are not high impact, more about building strength and stamina. Try and find a club with a woman involved in coaching, or better still plenty of older girls.

also Pilates or Yoga, can do at home with a video and/or you.

Roller skating or Ice skating.

Please dont make her feel like theres anything wrong with her preferences. I was exactly the same and my Dad used to upset me so much by making me feel bad about it. He was constantly on at me to go outside, try this try that when all I wanted to do was read, paint and do other crafts, listen to music , jigsaws etc. I was perfectly happy.

I did have a weight problem but that was directly related to food and disordered eating.

I am still drawn to “inactive” hobbies. But I am (I think!) a nice kind person with friends, close family, had a good job and a good range of interests. That’s more important to me.

(NB some posters like to list their kids activities as if they were trying to impress the schools admissions board..take them with a pinch of salt!)

Id encourage her to learn to ride a bike, in the skill category rather than exercise.

How about team sports? Or somewhere together?

Yoga? Pilates? Badminton? Table tennis? Karate (with self defense in mind)? Golf?

There's lots you've not tried yet. For me it's about finding what she likes and yes she should do exercise outside of school. It helps mind and body and can be a way to make new friends. All things she will need as she gets older.

Do you do anything as a family activity wise such as a fun swim?

Weight wise I wouldn't worry just yet. Just keep an eye on snacks as they become poor habits /boredom eating.

We have done some fun swim sessions as a family this summer which she’s enjoyed yes.

Horse riding sounds expensive. But yes she loves animals and would love it.

Good point on cycling as a skill. And if she passes this damn 11+ it will make logistics easier for her I suppose.

Loads of food for thought here, esp on portion sizes. Thank you all.

I went on a school residential trip in the early 1970's and still have a photo my dad took of me and all the other kids standing in front of the coach before we got on. There's around 40 of us, and there is just one overweight child. One out of 40.

DD doesn’t like sport but she loves nature so we do forest/woods walks and she goes to the outdoor pursuits centre for bushcraft. Anything that gets her moving really.