To expect MoH to refund hen accommodation after we were refused access?

[Hennightmare]

I attended a hen party at the weekend - Friday to Sunday, staying close to a seaside resort in a private accommodation. I paid my share in advance - nearly £300.

Upon arrival, we were greeted by the owner who refused entry on the basis that hen parties (and same sex groups/stags) are not allowed and this is stated in the booking terms and conditions and elsewhere on the website. Despite reasoning, the owner was not backing down, and said there’d been an incident with a same sex group two weekends ago which required costly repairs.

MoH said she was aware of other hens who had stayed and this is how she found the place on instagram. She was told no refund would be given as there wouldn’t be time to let it again for the weekend.

We managed to find budget hotel rooms in the area but this scuppered the plans which were in place for the house - games etc.

I have looked myself and it is prominent on the website about the rules around hen parties etc. It is clear there has been inconsistent approaches in the past though.

Should the MoH cover us for her mistake? I am out of pocket after the hotel booking.

YABU - suck it up, it happened
YANBU - her mistake, she should offer to cover it

I agree with this.

All in all, that will be far less upsetting for the bride than a small claims claim over her hen.

I wouldn't be too bothered what the bride thinks, now she's said she doesn't want anyone to make a fuss (well she would, she wasn't out of pocket)

Well, she's acted badly and should have offered to pay and then you could all have said "oh no, these things happen" and made the best of it rather than being arsey.

I wouldn't expect her to pay for you all and if I were the bride and found out that you were asking for this I would pay you all back myself and then uninvite you all from the wedding, save the money that way.

Oh please read the thread!

This trashy northerner would if the MOH accepted her mistake and apologised but her subsequent condescension would drive me to chase her the hole way to the court and more if needed.

I see your thinking. However, I wonder if the hens also incurred extra costs because the accommodation changed from a shared house to budget hotel(s).

E.g. they might have brought drinks to have in the house, but then had to pay for drinks in a pub instead. And they might have expected to have food delivered at lunchtime/brought snacks to eat then, but instead had to pay to eat out.

The OP also says the hens had planned to play games, which they couldn't do because of the change of venue. Does that mean they had to pay for other activities instead?

By ignoring the owner's T&Cs, and the follow-up email, the MoH undoubtedly changed the whole weekend - in terms of vibe as well as (probably) costs - on top of the £130 the eight other hens each had to pay for hotels.

Unless she paid for all extra pub drinks/meals out/other activities (if those happened), then yes, I do think the MoH should refund £300 to each of the other eight hens.

Well they would need to establish what those other costs were.

The reality is that sometimes in social situations, you don't always get money spent the way you would choose if you want to go with the flow. I had to pay for a meal at a restaurant DH and I really dislike the other evening, because it was where the group we went with chose. Everyone went to get tapas, which we hardly touched (all very heavy pork and fried things we just don't enjoy). The original plan had been to go somewhere else but it didn't work out for various reasons. DH and I just paid our share because that's the risk you take when socialising in a group.

I'm not going to what's app them all now and say "actually that restaurant was not on the plan when we set out, I didn't like it and we had to heat up food we had planned to use the next day when we got home as we were both starving because we didn't get the food we thought we would get and were hungry for more. So please can you refund our cost of the meal plus the cost of the meal we heated up at home."

I realise the analogy isn't entirely on all fours, but that's the vibe.

More like booking a villa with good facilities but you did it under a lie. Everyone pays you for the villa as you’ve booked it.

Owner confirms again no lies right? If so cancel NOW and get a refund. Otherwise if found to lie no refund and no stay.

When you arrive the owner catches the bookers lies and prohibits the stay with no refund as per the terms and conditions.

Now you all get lumped in travel lodge rooms and you have to pay more.

Then the bride and Moh expect you all to suck it up.

nah.

£430 in the end to stay at travel lodge when sold a villa basically lol some people have more money than sense if they would suck that up along with the attitude of the moh and bride.

We book large houses (sleep 15) for our family in rural areas and they almost always say no hen or stag groups.

Last time I went on a hen it was the same. We booked a large country house, officially they said no hens but we did anyway. I think this is the norm and this group got really unlucky because of a recent event

Yeah, and it must have been obvious it was a hen party.

We did the same on a stag weekend I was part of. We booked a house for a "university reunion", and made sure only one person went to collect the key with the others (including a "couple", which may have given the owner a good impression) arriving later. It worked out fine. We're civilised, tidy people so nobody trashed the place - plus we were lucky that the owner didn't enquire too deeply! 🙂

She may as well have said, “Seriously guys, I graced you with my presence and dazzled you with my personality, which let’s face it, is worth much more than £300 a head. You should be grateful I’m not charging you for my company at the wedding. Consider yourselves very lucky indeed.”

£430 in the end to stay at travel lodge when sold a villa

This is also a good way of looking at it tbf

Small claims court it is then !!

Wow. So if you were the bride you’d expect people to just suck up a loss of £300 each because the MoH you appointed lied and fucked up to the point where she rejected a perfectly reasonable offer of a full refund, in favour of trying to outwit the owner of the venue ? And if the people involved don’t want to accept the shitty end of the stick they’re no longer invited to the wedding ? That’s taking bridezilla toa whole different level.

Exactly this. She was given the opportunity to cancel for a full refund but didn't.

@Hennightmare I would reply "Hi, £300 is a lot of money to most of us. As you were sent an email saying no hen parties and the opportunity for a full refund, I think you need to still pursue the owner for a full refund stating you didn't see/read the email in time due to being busy with work, then refund everyone in full. Make it clear to the owner that had she phoned you to check if you'd read the email then you would have then asked for the refund. You need to push this as otherwise its unfair "

Someone else has messaged to say they’ve contacted the owner directly threatening a negative review if money is not returned. She obviously doesn’t know what I found out from my friend yesterday!

Wow poor owner. They don’t deserve to be out of pocket anymore than you hens do.

August is prime holiday time they likely could have rebooked if the moh had just admitted fault and cancelled.

To be fair, emailing only a couple of weeks out changing the terms and conditions after booking and only giving a short window to accept or decline (knowing that you might struggle to get another property in time) is actually pretty unfair. Regardless of the opportunity to cancel (which was by email and easily missed), I do think the property owner should have honoured the booking and changed their conditions for any new booking. They could have reiterated to your party that any damage and issues will be paid for. I would definitely have left a negative review on that basis.

If I was part of the group. I would just let the money go and put it behind me rather than cause bad feeling before the wedding. Of course you have all learnt from the experience.

Not sure if you're aware, but if it exists, you can search old versions of websites before any changes were made. See if this website has a prior version of the site you booked on around the time you booked, just to check on t &cs.

web.archive.org/

I’d reply to moh thanking her for clarifying her stance and that you’ll see her at the small claims court.

This is a good thing, because the owner will likely respond outlining exactly what happened in terms of their T&C's, the follow up email to the MOH, etc. It'll clarify the situation.

I have messaged MoH privately, making clear I know what happened from speaking to the bride to be, and suggesting a refund of some description would in order. I am leaving this off the group for now as I don’t think things kicking off in there will be productive to resolving things.