To not want to spend my staycation watching tv

[Thosecandlesdontmatch]

All the family is off for three weeks together. It’s the most we’ve ever been off. We are going away for a couple of nights an hour away at the end of the holiday.
We live in a tourist area with lots to do.
We’ve had some mornings at the beach and at some attractions, but we seem to be having lots of days just at home.
Dh goes on his computer and Dc play or watch tv, but I feel that we’re wasting our time together and it wasn’t how I imagined it.
I would love to at least go out every morning, maybe relax in the afternoon, then some nights out locally or back to the beach.
Dh seems happy and says he just wants to relax

Would you be happy with having whole days inside?

So... to make you happy everyone has to not do the things they want to do?

3 weeks is a long time when you’re not actually going on holiday. You live in a tourist area yet mentioned the beach, coastal towns don’t typically have much to offer beyond the actual beach and associated activities. I wouldn’t want to go to the beach every single day for 3 weeks running. If you wanted some sort of structure you should have planned and booked activities.

I don't think either you or your DH is unreasonable but didn't you talk about a plan before your three weeks started?

For three weeks off and staying at home I wouldn't expect to be out every day but have a few days out (whole or part) then 1 day at home.

I think it also depends on the age of your DC. Mine at 8 and 4 so being out if preferred as at home they would end up arguing all the time and bored after 3 weeks of that.

There is a fine balance between being out and being at home, esp for such a long period.

8

When ours were young we used to try and do lots of activities.... by day 4 they were begging to stay at home in PJ's.

Can you not go and do whatever you want and they can do the same?

I think you need to make staying at home hard work, OP! Give them (including DH) jobs to do, make them prefer the idea of getting out. Obviously the odd day at home chilling is fine, but not sliding into a coma.

If you only had three days off, you'd be right to be pissed off at spending it indoors. But three weeks? The odd day chilling in front of the telly won't kill you.

Sounds like it should have been better planned, but you still have time to change things up. Family meeting perhaps about going out some days and having chill out days. I think a planned day out is better than walking out the door and just winging it, everyone will soon tire of that. Important they get to have down days though. (My son had to have the week before school started back to do nothing or it would negatively affect him).

None by the sounds of it.

It’s important to have a plan before the staycation starts to differentiate it from simply being at home. I would have thought there would have been a fun time with the whole family ‘brainstorming’ what do to during those three weeks, then writing a schedule up on the wall. Including chill out days of course. No point waking each morning with, ‘so what shall we do today’? You’ll just get a load of ‘dunno’s’.

Aren't they bored at home at 8 years old? Iii thought you were going to say mid to late teens!

Home is ok if you have stuff planned that's different. When my two were young, one was about that age we had a long time off like you and wrote a play version of a Julia Donaldson book, made masks for each character, rehearsals and on day 6 it was the performance with an audience of their parents and Granny and Granddad.

I also live in a similar place to OP and I’d be hard pushed to be in holiday mode here for three weeks, even though it’s full of people holidaying here. It’s just my home town and neighborouring city. There’s nothing new to do or see.

Same.

I thought op was going to say there were teens and if that was the case I was going to say they’re lucky to get them out at all! But 8 is very little, I’d want to be doing more days out etc at that age.

Inertia will soon set in and then you find that no one wants to do very much. You're the one trying to rally the troops on your own nervously watching time slipping away. In the same boat so i understand.
Can you and your child go out, anywhere, it doesn't matter then try and plan things for a few days??

The issue is that you want 'family time', but DH doesn't feel the same need.
The 8 year olds are dependent on you and/or DH to organise stuff.

The best you can do is organise to take the DC out, and tell DH 'we are going to X tomorrow, do you want to come?'
If he wants to come, fine, although it is annoying that he is happy to be a passenger in family life and leave the mental load to you.
If he doesn't want to come, then that is a much big problem; he doesn't value quality time with you or your DC.

Sometimes doing nothing is not a waste of time if that’s what you want to do.
We’re all different and like to spend our time doing different things.
If you want to be out and about more, then you can do but you can’t force everyone else to because it’s not their preference.

I find my children a bit feral if they are inside all day and especially if they have lots of screen time. DH and I have been alternating days off due to annual leave rather than time off together but we make sure to get the kids out of the house once a day. This week I took them for a day out of Monday, to somewhere they could play all day basically, yesterday I took them into local city on the train in the morning and we went around the museum (free) and they did a craft there (£3 each) today they spent 2 hours at the park and I met my mum there so she could see them. Tomorrow and Friday DH has them and they will do something cheap as well. So no I wouldn’t be happy to spend all day inside.

If I had 3 weeks at home I'd have made a plan ages ago, mapping out days out, friends over, visiting people etc, otherwise my lazy lot would just be lolling about in their undies watching screens. You know for next year that you will need to be more proactive in planning a nice summer I guess.

Yes, teens are hard to rally if family thing IME unless on holiday where things are a new experience. Locally they would only motivated by friend meet ups which are usually mid to late afternoon- evening!

Surely depends on the 'nothing'. At 8 if it's playing, reading, drawing, bit of TV perhaps but I would argue only for a day, seems unnatural and a waste of childhood for an eight year old child to be lounging around like an 18 year old student in halls all week!

When I was 8, I could happily spend days at home entertaining myself - computer games, reading, playing in the garden, riding my bike, board or card games, baking etc.

For days but a week or three? It's supposed to be a staycation as a family, it's a bit sad that there is no desire for that from the Dad and actually as a parent you need to engage with your children attending to their needs, actively parenting them involves providing opportunities to broaden their horizons, they cannot do that for themselves at eight, unlike teenagers and IME that is what cherishing your children looks like.

Yeah its a bit shit. Life is for living. Especially in this weather

Dd has had some time playing with friends on the road, so she’s not been bored.

We last went out for a busy day out on Saturday.
Sunday was lots of garden time & swimming
We have taken the dog out, but now that’s enough being at home for me!
Definitely planning beach in morning or day out tomorrow!