Friends mocking my engagement :(

[UpShitsCreek]

My fiance proposed to me this week after 3 years together, just a day after our 3 year anniversary!

He had planned to propose in his home country when we visited a few months back but it was very busy seeing all this family (his mum is British before any comments about wanting a UK visa!).

We had a stressful time coming back and I had been prepping for a new job interview. He came home from work around 9, told me to put some shoes on as he wanted to show me something…

He drove me to a road and got out and said “this is the first place I ever said I loved you” and then proposed, with a gorgeous delicate ring!

I was on cloud 9, so happy. I always told him I didn’t like big proposals and I’d been embarrassed if someone saw, so this felt perfect and quite romantic.

Saw my best friends today. Both of them were saying how cheap it was, how it was thoughtless and that they’d be sick if they were proposed to in their pyjamas (like I was), and that he could have done something more romantic. They were laughing about it as well.

It’s made me really really sad. Aibu to think that the proposal was quite thoughtful… the first place he said “I love you” is quite sweet?

The proposal was perfect. Your friends sound like they’ve fallen into the trap of the Hollywood proposal where everything needs to be seen and on display and bigger and better. Yours was sentimental, sweet and personal.

They’re not your friends

Congratulations.

Find new friends.

OP it must have been said hundreds of times already by page 22, but nevertheless I still feel moved to chip in with my agreement with you.

Having a fiance who has paid attention to you as a person, what you prefer, and where matters to you both & your relationship - bodes infinitely better for a long and wonderful marriage together than any tourist-spot backdrop with curated flashmob/petals/ring in dessert/string quartet nonsense that your friends may have been more "approving" of.

You have a gem! Wishing you both every happiness for the future, a wonderful wedding day - but more importantly a successful MARRIAGE where you continue to put each other, and not other people, at the centre of what you do 🥰

I’m like you @UpShitsCreek. I don’t like big showy proposals and always said that if DP proposed, I’d want it to be something simple in a place that meant something to us as a couple.

His proposal approach meant something to you as a couple, and you loved it. That’s all that matters.

Your friends are being shitbags. My two best friends would NEVER behave like this. And would be nothing but happy for me.

Are they usually this insensitive? They don’t sound like very good friends to me, no matter how long you’ve known them.

Oh and Congratulations!! 🥂🎉

Congratulations! What a lovely thoughtful and personal proposal. Your fiancée sounds wonderful. Your ‘friends’ do not.

Get rid of your “friends” they are jealous.

congratulations!! Xx

Your friends are jealous & shallow ... I think its lovely who cares what they think.
Congratulations x

It sounds like a very sweet and thoughtful proposal to me. It also seems you didn't expect it which gave it some surprise and as long as it made you feel happy and loved that's all that matters. I find it strange that your friends openly criticised it, are they often this crass? As I imagine even if that was their true opinion most people would keep their mouths shut out of politeness.

If they were your friends then they should be happy that you are happy.

The details of why you are happy (and the fact that they presumably would not be under the same circumstances) are unimportant.

I would be cooling down my friendship with them, as the situation probably won't improve in the future.

Your fiancé sounds like a keeper. Your friends on the other hand, not so much.....

Best wishes! It sounded romantic to me! Spontaneous, surprising you, and you in your pj's, I think it's a good story for your grandchildren some day.💐

@UpShitsCreek

This.

Eldest doesn’t necessarily mean best, especially in terms of friendships. We can easily out grow them. Going in very different directions is one thing, if we’re able to be kind and tolerant, they sound mean and shallow.

Congrats btw!!

Lovely proposal, all the Instagram-worthy proposals make me wonder how long the marriage will last. I know some people who had a "hint" so they'd have their nails done so they look great in the photos/videos for Instagram. Congratulations and ignore your friends, they are not real friends pissing on your parade

I think I would text them and say how hurtful I found their comments to be, that while they might value a big showy proposal, what he did was perfect for you - I feel like your fiance deserves for you to stand up for him here and knock their bitchy comments on the head!
How they respond will tell you a lot about them. A sincere apology and maybe you can move past it (so long as they are mindful of your feelings in future and not snotty about your fiance). A doubling down and you know it's time to distance yourself a bit further and not share personal things.

This!

It doesn’t actually matter how someone proposes, or where or how much it cost!

Your ‘friends’ sound very high maintenance! Imagine proposing to someone and them saying the proposal isn’t good enough and want something ‘more romantic’….. I feel bad for men with women like that as partners!

Anyway @UpShitsCreek congratulations x

No we’re not and no she wasn’t invited

She sounds nuts and obviously a terrible friend.