Friends mocking my engagement :(

[UpShitsCreek]

My fiance proposed to me this week after 3 years together, just a day after our 3 year anniversary!

He had planned to propose in his home country when we visited a few months back but it was very busy seeing all this family (his mum is British before any comments about wanting a UK visa!).

We had a stressful time coming back and I had been prepping for a new job interview. He came home from work around 9, told me to put some shoes on as he wanted to show me something…

He drove me to a road and got out and said “this is the first place I ever said I loved you” and then proposed, with a gorgeous delicate ring!

I was on cloud 9, so happy. I always told him I didn’t like big proposals and I’d been embarrassed if someone saw, so this felt perfect and quite romantic.

Saw my best friends today. Both of them were saying how cheap it was, how it was thoughtless and that they’d be sick if they were proposed to in their pyjamas (like I was), and that he could have done something more romantic. They were laughing about it as well.

It’s made me really really sad. Aibu to think that the proposal was quite thoughtful… the first place he said “I love you” is quite sweet?

Many congratulations OP, that sounds like the perfect proposal, thoughtful and understated. Wishing you and your fiance a wonderful wedding and many years of happiness.

As for the 'friends', well they just sound jealous and bitchy. Are they the types that live their lives on Instagram or some such? At least you can leave them off the wedding invite list.

He, and you, sound delightful.

Your friends are vile.

*fiancé OP! Get used to saying it! That is such a lovely and romantic story, he sounds like a keeper. Congratulations!

Let me guess - your friends are all about the likes on their Instagram poses and live a fake and shallow life.

Congratulations ❤️
What a lovely and genuine proposal.
Your friends sound selfish jealous and spiteful. I'd look for new friends.
Ignore them and enjoy your little bubble and wedding planning. Xx

Wow, I was full on thinking how romantic this was until I got to the bit about your “friends”. Please do without them until you find new ones.

I don’t think they’re your friends. They sound very jealous and bitter. I’d imagine no one would want to marry them with that attitude. If you’re happy that’s all that matters. It sounds like very thoughtful and romantic to me. Congratulations

The proposal sounds lovely. Don’t let them ruin it for you.

It's perhaps a first for me....to say ditch the friends, keep the man 😂

He sounds lovely. They are pricks.

I agree, and its a first for me too!

Ive always found couples with big shows for things like engagements are far less likely to have deep long lasting relationships.

Anecdotally, me too. The couples I know that had big "social media" style proposals are either divorced or unhappily married.

Some people are only interested in an ‘instagram’ proposal. They don’t really care who the person is as long as it looks good on a photo.

Your proposal was heartfelt and lovely and I wish you many years of happiness together.

My DH proposed with no preparation and no ring. We were just sitting on the sofa and he felt so overwhelmed by his feelings he said he just had to ask me to marry him then and there.

I absolutely LOVED it.

My ex proposed abroad, with a ring, on one knee, at sunset by a river. Sounds better on paper, but it made me feel embarrassed (as it was a public space) and uneasy because the little speech he'd prepared just didn't convince me that he truly was ready for this step. It felt like a performance. I said yes, but we never got married - my gut was right.

I also felt sorry for a friend of my colleague, whose DH had taken her to Venice to propose. My colleague was telling people behind her back that she thought Venice was clichéd and boring and he could have put in more effort! Colleague was only about 20 so I put it down to the ignorance of youth. I find younger people often have a vision of how a proposal (or wedding) should be, but as you get older you realise there are many ways to do these things and what's right for you may not be right for them.

Congratulations on your engagement!

I think it sounds perfectly lovely - and very thoughtful.
Congratulations to you both.
Your 'best friends' sound awful.
If they bring the subject up again, I would tell them how disappointed you are with their response and that you never realised how shallow they are.
All the very best for the future.

Your friends are dicks. It's a lovely proposal.

Some people are all about the giant Instagram worthy gestures and giant ring and that's great but it doesn't mean any less to have a delicate ring and it means so much more to have a heart felt proposal ♥️
My hubby proposed to me in his xr2i outside my house and we had been with each other just 8 weeks. Congratulations ❤️

Sounds lovely to me OP. That moment obviously was huge in your relationship so to go back there, is really personal and thoughtful. Who wants style over substance?

Congratulations 🥂 too.

Do not make these women your bridesmaids please

You shouldn't be questioning the proposal, but your friendships.

Congratulations to you both - that sounds like a really lovely and thoughtful proposal.

My husband proposed to me in a supermarket car park in the rain 🤣 We've been very happily married for 27 years this year.

I do think some people forget that a marriage is forged in the everyday moments, on the normal boring weekdays. It's not actually about the big set piece occasions (I mean, they can be lovely, but they're not what makes a marriage) More fool them, I say.

He thought of you. He realised and remembered that moment and place in your relationship and he felt it would be a special time. I think its lovely. Your friends wouldn't understand it aas a special moment between the two of you that you won't get back . Congrats!!!

Odd these are your best friends

can’t imagine what an acquaintance must be like

You don't need friends like this. Are they jealous, perhaps? My husband proposed to me in the car on our way out. When I said yes, he pulled over and kissed me, then we went on our way. I genuinely don't understand why a proposal of marriage needs to be a big, ostentatious, splashy and expensive business - after all, surely it's just two people who love each other, agreeing to make a life together? I wish you every happiness, and hope you will have as long and happy marriage as my husband and I.

Oh god I hate the over performative pretentious proposals. Ridiculous.
Yours sounds really lovely and sweet and real!
Congratulations 🎉

You need new friends.

I think your friends are nasty to be honest and not real friends. Who behaves like that with a friend they care about?!? The most important thing is that you are happy and you felt good about it, fuck anyone else. I actually think it’s quite sweet. What’s important is how they treat you every day not ridiculously over engineered proposals that are all about ego. Tell your friends to shut up or just get rid.