To be driven crazy by a few very, very common expressions on Mumsnet?

[Pineapplesonpizza]

Here are two to start with:

"Just that really." after the initial title of the post, sometimes accompanied by shrug emoji.

The word "surely".

Do you have any that irrationally irritate you?

It works for us (especially used when DH earns a lot of money and she doesn't work but she lives off him)

USE YOUR WORDS.

Makes me want to throw my laptop across the room in anger and fury every time I see it. So patronising and fecking ridiculous, and you can tell that every single poster who writes it thinks they are being ever so clever and oh so big.

No, you sound like a condescending, patronising smug twat! 😎

You clearly don't like her /him/MIL etc

Am having to lie down with a cold flannel on my forehead, these are SO irritating, especially this one. Or 'it sounds like you don't like him much'.

I can't stand ick. It sounds like it should be used by 5 year olds in the playground.

"Yep." It translates as a world-weary "Yes, I understand this better than almost anyone on this thread. I have special experience that makes me a wise old hand whom you have to respect."

"Explain xyz to me as if I were two/stupid/an alien." No. I'll explain it to you as if you accepted some level of responsibility for not being ignorant/naive.

Or 'Gently...' 😫

Plus, 'Wow. Just wow.'

Both make me very annoyed!

“Just…”. Because it’s always used so flippantly for what most people would consider big things, or makes huge assumptions.

”just get a new car”. As if everyone can afford to do that.
”just get your husband to do it” when OP has made no mention of having a partner (I saw one last week where she’d already said she was single).

Today, I saw “just resign”. As if anyone is so fortunate to be able to just quit their job with no back up. The OP did highlight to that user it had taken her serval months to secure a roll so “just resigning” would be moronic. And come to think of it, it was a very playful post and the OP wasn’t even unhappy in her job.

Could not agree more! 👏

“ducks in a row” just needs to die, horribly, and then get buried in concrete.

“I’ve just asked DH/read this to DH and he said…”

Some of these are just normal turns of phase in everyday life, not a Mumsnet thing. You must spent your lives in a state of perpetual irritation.

Yup is worse !

That’s true but in real life I rarely hear about the ducks in a row, yet on here every single poster with marital problems is told to do it, repeatedly.

Goodness, you lot are an intolerant bunch!

I don't mind most of the regular MN sayings tbh, apart from 'HTH' which is about as passive aggressive as it gets.

I'm far more irritated by poor spelling and grammar, so I often hang out in Pedants' Corner to have a vent.

Coz a man's opinion trumps ANYthing on the thread. 😆

.

And always said as if it's such a simple, straightforward thing to do.

It boils my piss
I lost my shit

Both horribly vulgar phrases which thankfully I’ve never seen/heard outside of here.

I do quite like those 2 😆 But I know they're disliked on MN so try not to say them!

I don't think I've heard any of these phrases said out loud in real life though.

Maybe I am sheltered .

So basically, you're intolerant too then?!

Thanks for clearing that up. 😎

Also ‘change the locks’ . Like that’s going to help!

Deeply
Bliss
Gently
In the trenches
Cool girls

Nobody says any of this in real life 😖

Are you peri?
Book a spa day - in response to the most minor of indiscretions!

I hear it and use it often (though not about someone's marital problems).