Soooo fed up of having to sleep on thr floor in my toddler’s room

[Beachbooks]

My son is 21 months and used to self settle and sleep 12 hours a night.

Last month he started fighting his nap and waking up at 5am. Everything I read online said not to start their day at that time so I went into his room and laid down on the floor to try and get him to settle again. Sometimes it worked sometimes it didn’t.

Then a week or so later he started kicking off at bedtime and climbing out his cot so we had to take the sides off. Initially he refused to sleep in the bed so has been sleeping on a mattress on the floor. He wouldn’t go to sleep unless I was in the room and was waking up at 4 and I was having to go into his room and sleep on the floor again.

This week things have got even worse - he’s taking 90 minutes + to fall sleep no matter what time I put him to bed then waking up a couple of hours later and will not sleep unless I stay in his room. I waited an hour when he woke up at 10 this evening and when I was sure he was asleep I crept out and of course he woke up screaming again.

So I’ve got another night of sleeping on the floor ahead of me.

I’m just sooooo fed up of it, the room is not big enough for another mattress so I’m on a yoga mat which isn’t really any help and I have a bad back anyway and this is making it worse

i don’t even know the point of this thread but I just need to rant as I’m just hating this at the moment and feels like every night is worse than the last. I just don’t know what to do with him.

Say a nice goodnight, leave room. If toddler gets out say something like “it’s bedtime now” and put them back in bed. Leave room again. No chat, no shushing etc.

It will work- you might have 1-2 nights of misery but after that you’ll be back to normal.

Thanks for all the tips everyone - really appreciate it

I’ve always been very anal about his sleep so we’ve got black out blinds / white noise / consistent & calming bedtime routine etc

I would take the 5am wake ups back for anything but it’s now progressed onto night waking

Ah I hated this phase spending hours trying to settle him. We had to just drop the nap once my son was 15 months old. It was really hard having him on the go all day long but it did solve the fight at bedtime.

I think if you are dropping the nap then you should try early bedtime to escape the overtiredness trap, as then even if takes 1-2 hours to settle, it's not that late and his night sleep won't be so short.

I agree with setting a wake time and sticking with it but it's hard when the night is so broken to start with. You might need to alternate nap and no nap days to start with, especially if waking 5-6am, taking into account his sleep needs over 24h as PP said.

Honestly don't be afraid of early bed time, we've always erred on trialling more sleep before capping, as overtiredness is harder to tackle.

With regards to him staying in bed, then a big bed (single) with a bed guard might make it more exciting/novel, make sure he has a comforter of some description and do some rapid return/gradual retreat sleep training - and don't cave whatever you do and return to sleeping on his floor whatever you (unless you're happy to potentially do that for the next 1-2 years)

My DS got up at 5.30 for years, sometimes 4.30. It’s a phase. If they sleep through the night then tolerating early wakings is just part and parcel of having young DC.

It’s very rare to find a child who has always slept through AND doesn’t wake early.

Try gradual retreat; moving closer towards the door each night. If all else fails consult a sleep trainer. Nicola at Child Sleep Solutions is v good.

It is part and parcel of having young DC though; often there is no rhyme or reason. I stayed with my DS until he fell asleep until he was 6!

I promise it ends. Just make sure you eat lots and rest when you can. Once he’s fallen asleep go back and sleep in your own bed.

My lg dropped her nap about this age , it is hard for the first couple of weeks and feels sooo early but they do learn to power through. You could also alternate it so nap every other day or on nursery days only for example while he gets used to it
I think this will help with the sleep pressure as it was the same for my girl! Good luck!

@HeyThereDelila unfortunately he’s not sleeping through the night anymore !

I’ve tried staying with him till he falls asleep but even after an hour of seeming to be asleep he is wide awake and crying the moment I make a move to leave

Maybe stop stop the late evening bath. Mine were energised by the bath so I bathed them in the late afternoon instead. It gave them enough zip to have dinner and some quiet reading or an early evening walk, and then they started feeling tired again. They washed hands and faces after eating, so it wasn't necessary to do the full bath.

Buy a children's weighted blanket and see if that helps too.

Also cut out all screen time from 4pm on. Don't let him watch content with any adversarial element to it. Avoid dinosaur and large machine content too unless these characters are peaceful and friendly.

How feisty is he during the day, and does he engage in behaviour like head banging or similar at times other than bedtime?

Thank you for your post - last night I have him a bath and then did an hour of puzzles & reading to help him wind down as we have been going from lots of excitement in the bath straight into bedtime routine. I suppose it’s too early to see if that’s going to make a difference.

He doesn’t watch tv or go on an iPad so we are already covered there.

He generally pretty nicely natured but very strong willed if he’s not getting his way & the tantrums are definitely coming in thick and fast. He will occasionally bang his head in a rage during the day not very often .

We have been doing this for weeks with our 3yo without any success at all