Soooo fed up of having to sleep on thr floor in my toddler’s room

[Beachbooks]

My son is 21 months and used to self settle and sleep 12 hours a night.

Last month he started fighting his nap and waking up at 5am. Everything I read online said not to start their day at that time so I went into his room and laid down on the floor to try and get him to settle again. Sometimes it worked sometimes it didn’t.

Then a week or so later he started kicking off at bedtime and climbing out his cot so we had to take the sides off. Initially he refused to sleep in the bed so has been sleeping on a mattress on the floor. He wouldn’t go to sleep unless I was in the room and was waking up at 4 and I was having to go into his room and sleep on the floor again.

This week things have got even worse - he’s taking 90 minutes + to fall sleep no matter what time I put him to bed then waking up a couple of hours later and will not sleep unless I stay in his room. I waited an hour when he woke up at 10 this evening and when I was sure he was asleep I crept out and of course he woke up screaming again.

So I’ve got another night of sleeping on the floor ahead of me.

I’m just sooooo fed up of it, the room is not big enough for another mattress so I’m on a yoga mat which isn’t really any help and I have a bad back anyway and this is making it worse

i don’t even know the point of this thread but I just need to rant as I’m just hating this at the moment and feels like every night is worse than the last. I just don’t know what to do with him.

Oh god life is too short for that! I’d be looking at a floor bed as an option for his room, or having him in with me. I appreciate you think you’d squash him but you’re aware of them there and probably both have your own space.

No advice OP, just solidarity. My DD is 21 months and we’re in a similar spot, though she has always woken multiple times in the night and has never self settled. She often fights bedtime and sometimes wants to fully get up and run around in the middle of the night.

I’ve tried every “method”, every routine, bed and nap time variations, you name it… anything other than co-sleeping and responding to her needs gets us all LESS sleep.

I hope you find something that works, but I’m very much in the camp of “it doesn’t last forever, they are tiny, whatever we need to do to get sleep at night is ok”.

Perhaps someone else has suggested this, but a good camping mattress might help your back: www.decathlon.co.uk/p/inflatable-trekking-mattress-size-l-mt500-180-x-52-cm/189392/c344c344m8799965?utm_source=awin&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=ShopForward+CSS_531573&utm_content=www.google.com&sv1=affiliate&sv_campaign_id=531573&awc=26895_1784875159_550904dca1a25d51e425e87d31599208

I had all proper single beds for my DC to sleep in. With all 4 DC I slept beside them until they settled. Still doing this with my youngest who will be 9 soon.

There's no point being uncomfortable on the floor. Look after yourself.

Is he really tired at bedtime? One of mine had to be literally dropping with exhaustion before they would go to sleep.

@Barney16 he goes quite silly & hyper when he gets tired. He’ll be exhibiting all his sleepy cues after dinner and then we get to bath time and he gets a burst of energy.

Tonight we’ve tried the putting him to bed and checking in on him every few mins. Didn’t even manage to get to that stage as he got out of bed constantly for an hour despite no nap today and a later bedtime.

He did eventually go to sleep and but woke up about midnight and has been awake and crying / getting out of bed constantly till then. Managed to settle once and then our creaky floorboards disturbed him as we walked away 😡

I feel so bad but I’m soo angry at the situation and I’ve had to come downstairs as I’m getting cross now

This course might be helpful: https://www.takingcarababies.com/?srsltid=AfmBOorpqhIvO2ivuP6LYvzfPBDjFHlDFoXNw9io8tvX0JQ4XxoK5-hs

Hope the rest of the night went better. I noted from your OP that you have switched to a bed as he was climbing out of the cot, and the advisory is to move them to a bed once it is no longer safe to be in a cot. There is a possibility that you have moved him to a cot too early - my 2.5year old is still in a cot. He can climb out, but not if he is in a sleeping bag. So we put him in a sleeping bag for naps and nighttime, and we know he can’t climb out then. Not a criticism at all, but just something for you to think about/try.

@YellowDaffodil25 tbh I would have preferred to keep him in the cot for longer but he was getting into an absolute rage in the cot and constantly climbing out and we just couldn’t risk it - he also can take off the sleeping bag so we had to switch it to a duvet

Can you swap the toddler bed for a proper single mattress on the floor, so you can get DC to sleep lying in with them? No way would I sleep on the floor!

Stop sleeping on the yoga mat !

You need proper sleep yourself

His room is a very odd shape so I can’t squeeze a mattress in there as well as his cot bed but I’m going to have to rethink everything if things don’t improve.

I just want to get back into my own bed but he just will not go back to sleep at the moment without us there - I keep reading it could be a sleep regression and not to make bad habits that you get stuck with like sleeping in with them but we just couldn’t keep going after 2 hours of it so my husband ended up on the floor

Kids naturally change their sleep patterns. It seems to me he no longer needs as much sleep as you expect.

I would try and drop the nap. He may seem tired in the afternoon for a week, but it should work itself out. You could instead try making bedtime later, if you want to keep the nap.

One thing not yet mentioned and which feels like the last thing you'll want to do when you're exhausted is to make sure you are completely physically exhausting him in the day. You are already spending hours trying to get him to sleep, an extra hour spent in the swimming pool or running round the park is more enjoyable and productive than what you are currently spending your time on sleep wise.

I also found that if they can't sleep, getting them up to do something that uses both brain and dexterity, like Lego or a puzzle, would often make them feel tired within 30 mins. I would read my book beside them but not fully engage, I didn't want to reward with attention, I wanted them to better gauge when they were actually tired and it worked.

Sleep does settle down when the nap drops completely, but the expectation that you'll cater to every whim doesn't, so do try to find better ways to manage it than sacrificing yourself.

I’ve made bedtime later and did try dropping the nap but he was just falling asleep in his high chair during lunch

I’d just have him in with you , everyone sleeps and eventually he will go back in his own room naturally . If you are worried about squishing him , which I really doubt you would perhaps try him on a mattress on the floor of your room .

@SueKeeper he doesn’t stop all day and we are spending most of our days at the park at the moment so physically I think he’s tired but just for some reason is waking up at night.

This is why I put all of mine in a double bed and co slept. Life's too short, sleep is king.

And there's nothing wrong with 5am starts

@gamerchick the 5am starts feel like bliss in hindsight in comparison to bedtime battles & night wakings lol

I would personally introduce some kind of sleep training

i know lots of people disagree but I know so many people who are still spending hours setting their 6-7-8 year olds at bedtime

@pouletvous this is what we tried to do last night (using the same technique as when he was a baby) but after 2 hours of almost non stop screaming we felt like we had no choice but to give up

when we took the rails off we put a safety gate on the door

on another note and a serious one please try to put a podcast on your phone - somehow it knocks you clean out - you’d be surprised

A blackout blind really helped my DS sleep a bit longer in the mornings. We have one that suctions on to the window so you can also take it on holiday. I wasn't prepared to leave him to cry due to him having a difficult start in life so I just made a comfortable setup for myself in his room (double bed).

I'm not sure if cutting his nap short will actually make him sleep more at night. He might now be overtired, which could be causing the hyperactive behaviour. Worth playing around with it a bit.

Sadly 5am is a natural wake up time for toddlers in summer when it gets light so early.
You could try black out blinds if you haven’t already got them, make sure no chink if light can get through. And try co sleeping in your bed, at least you won’t be on a mat in the floor.