Is my ex being an entitled cock lodger ?

[Bingobango86]

Ex dp and i have decided to go our separate ways due to him being unable to stop bringing up issues we have had in the past and i have come to the realisation i do not need to be spoken to like this , we have 3 dc together and ex dp is also disabled for context, we currently private rent and exdp solution is to move into my dining room and has a grand plan of turning it into his bedroom complete with lots of luxuries- which he has taken great delight in sending me - AIBU to want him to f**k off?

Is he on the tenancy and does does he pay rent/bills?

If he’s not on the tenancy just kick him out, if he is then you’ll need to decide whose moving out.

You are dumping him because he is unreasonable so don’t be surprised if he remains unreasonable.

Do you live separately now? And he's planning on moving into your dining room?

I don't understand what he's sending you?

Obviously tell him no, you’re splitting up so you won’t be living together. One of you stays in the current place while the other moves out or you both move out and get new homes. Start taking practical steps tomorrow to live apart. Did you not say anything when he made such a daft suggestion?

One of you needs to move out. What is happening about your dc?

Not enough information. Who is entitled to the property? Who pays the bills? Etc.

I pay all the bills, rent is in joint names unfortunatley! He has said he will take the DC to school every morning as I work full time but hes only managed a grand total of 4 school runs year to do date so im not sure - i guess would be every other weekend ?! Yes i laughed when I recieved the amazon links but in all.honesty all I want to do is cry right now

@Bingobango86 are you renting or do you own the property? Would it be worth getting legal advice about getting him removed from the tenancy? Sending hugs, its a difficult time x

I would be telling him you will transfer half the bills into his name & he can pay. I take he doesn’t work?

Also if he wants to turn the dining room into a bedroom where would you eat?? The mans living in cloud cuckoo land

So you live together but you're splitting up, and his idea is that the living room will become his bedroom and you'll buy him all sorts of shit for it?

What's the nature of his disability? And what does he expect you to buy?

The question for him is... and then what? You live together forever, him being kept by you? Clearly not.

So you need to end the contract and sign a new solo contract with the landlord. He has to go. Where, not your problem..

Maybe start by talking to the landlord. If you are the one paying the rent they may be helpful. They may even have another property in their portfolio that would suit you and the children. You certainly can't stay in the same house as a man who expects you to fund his lifestyle while he contributs nothing.

Cancel all the Amazon orders for a start! Good grief. When is your tenancy up? Can you get your landlord to let just to you? Stop buying him food, doing laundry, change the WiFi, Netflix and all the streaming services passwords - and the Amazon password.

Obviously if you are going to continuing sharing the same property without being in a relationship then you are not going to keep subsidising him.

If he wishes to stay then he needs to pay half of rent and half of all bills, food, etc. If he's not prepared to do that then he'll need to leave or find his own tenancy.

I'd speak to the landlord about the possibility of getting the tenancy put into your name (as you are working full time) and giving him notice to leave.

You can't really continuing living together, it won't work. And yes, he's an entitled cocklodger.

I’d find somewhere else to live asap.

Youre separating. I’m not sure what makes him think you’re going to carry in living in the same house!

Him bring disabled isn’t here nor there. I say that as a disabled person.

Btw, I’m not even sure I’d ask for the tenancy to go in your name only because he’ll drag his feet to move out. Even more so because he is going to find it very hard to find someone on UC+disability benefits

You need to end the tenancy and either take it over or just leave.

He needs to start paying half the bills and rent and do his own cooking, washing and so on.

How long is there to go on the tenancy? When can you give notice? Because I reckon the only way you will get rid of him is to move out, to somewhere else where he isn't.

Annoying as it will be to disrupt your and the kids lives, it won't be as annoying as him living the life of Riley in his man cave while you pay for everything.

You probably need to sever yourself from the tenancy and find somewhere else to live, him living the high life in the dining room isn't going to work and it sounds like he is not going to move out.

Why on earth does he think he can make you live in the same home and buy all that stuff for him?

Is he drunk?

Give your notice. Get somewhere without him.